Autumn III: 16

Left.

祝ひ置きてなを長月と契かな今日摘む菊の末の白露

iwaiokite
nao nagatsuki to
chigiri kana
kyō tsumu kiku no
sue no shiratsuyu
Celebrating:
To have yet more long life,
Is the vow, with
White dewdrops from the tips
Of today’s plucked chrysanthemums…

Lord Sada’ie.

451

Right (Win).

君が經ん代を長月のかざしとて今日折り得たる白菊の花

kimi ga hen
yo o nagatsuki no
kazashi tote
kyō orietaru
shiragiku no hana
That my Lord will pass through
Ages more, for the Longest Month
Our garland will be
Picked on this very day,
White chrysanthemum blooms!

Lord Takanobu.

452

Neither team can find any fault with the other’s poem this round.

Shunzei’s judgement: The Left’s poem is excellent in both diction and overall configuration [sugata kotoba yū narubeshi]. Although the Right’s fine phrase [shūku] ‘picked on this very day’ (kyō orietaru) is somewhat archaic [koto furite] and I am unable to appreciate it, the Left’s poem, however, sounds as if it were a poem praying for one’s own long life. The Right, though, celebrates for one’s Lord, and so must win.

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