Autumn III: 16



nao nagatsuki to
chigiri kana
kyō tsumu kiku no
sue no shiratsuyu
To have yet more long life,
Is the vow, with
White dewdrops from the tips
Of today’s plucked chrysanthemums…

Lord Sada’ie.


Right (Win).


kimi ga hen
yo o nagatsuki no
kazashi tote
kyō orietaru
shiragiku no hana
That my Lord will pass through
Ages more, for the Longest Month
Our garland will be
Picked on this very day,
White chrysanthemum blooms!

Lord Takanobu.


Neither team can find any fault with the other’s poem this round.

Shunzei’s judgement: The Left’s poem is excellent in both diction and overall configuration [sugata kotoba yū narubeshi]. Although the Right’s fine phrase [shūku] ‘picked on this very day’ (kyō orietaru) is somewhat archaic [koto furite] and I am unable to appreciate it, the Left’s poem, however, sounds as if it were a poem praying for one’s own long life. The Right, though, celebrates for one’s Lord, and so must win.

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