Autumn III: 30

Left.

龍田姫今はの比の秋風に時雨をいそぐ人の袖かな

tatsuta hime
ima wa no koro no
aki kaze ni
shigure o isogu
hito no sode kana
Princess Tatsuta,
At this time, now,
With the autumn winds
Does hurry along the showers
Upon folks’ sleeves.

A Servant Girl.

479

Right.

あはれなる身のたぐひとも思来し秋も今はの夕暮の空

awarenaru
mi no tagui tomo
omoikoshi
aki mo ima wa no
yūgure no sora
How sad
Am I and so, too,
I’d thought was
Autumn, now ended
With the evening skies.

Nobusada.

480

The Right state that ‘hurry along the showers’ (shigure o isogu) is lacking in technique [jutsu nashi]. The Left merely say that the Right’s poem ‘isn’t bad.’

Shunzei’s judgement: Both poems use ‘now’ (ima wa) in their diction [kotoba], in conjunction with a powerful [sechinaru] conception [kokoro] of regretting autumn’s passing. Nevertheless, the Gentleman of the Left has said the Right’s poem ‘isn’t bad’ and the Gentleman of the Right has said that of the Left ‘lacks technique’. I feel, however, that the initial conception ‘Princess Tatsuta, at this time, now’ (tatsuta hime ima wa) does not refer only to autumn [but could be used for winter, too]. The Right’s ‘Autumn, now ended with the evening skies’ (aki mo ima wa no yūgure no sora) is also somewhat lacking in technique, is it not? Thus, the round lacks a clear winner, or loser.

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