Left (Win)
都人宿を霞のよそに見て昨日もけふ野邊にくらしつ
miyakobito yado o kasumi no yoso ni mite kinō mo kyō nobe ni kurashitsu |
Capital folk of Their homes, through the haze, Catch a distant glimpse Yesterday, and again today, Have they spent among the fields. |
69
Right.
これぞこの春の野邊よと見ゆるかな大宮人のうちむれてゆく
kore zo kono haru no nobe yo to miyuru kana ōmiyabito no uchimureteyuku |
This, For springtime in the fields Is most apt, indeed: Folk from the mighty palace Gathering all together! |
70
For once, the Right describe the Left’s poem as ‘moving’ and have no criticisms to make of it. The Left merely wonder whether ‘folk from the mighty palace’ are entirely suited to the fields.
Shunzei agrees that the construction of ‘Their homes, through the haze,/Catch a distant glimpse’ is particularly good, and that it cannot be said that ‘folk from the mighty palace’ are appropriate for the fields in springtime, but that if they are gathering together, it might be possible. However, in this theme the poet should not be looking on, but be part of the scene, so the Left’s poem must be the winner.