思ひいでよみしよはよそに成りぬとも有りし名残の有明の月
| omoi’ideyo mishi yowa yoso ni narinu tomo arishi nagori no ariake no tsuki | O, remember me! The nights we were together distant Have become, yet I still have the keepsake of The moon at dawn…[i] |
610
[i] See: For the Poetry Match held at the Residence of the Regent and Chancellor. 風ふかばみねにわかれむ雲をだにありしなごりのかたみともみよ kaze fukaba / mine ni wakaremu / kumo o dani / arishi nagori no / katami to mo miyo ‘If the wind should blow, / Parting from the peak, / Even the clouds / My memories / Seem to represent!’ Lord Ietaka (Shinkokinshū XIV: 1292/Roppyakuban uta’awase 720)
Round Seven
Left
秋の夜はながゐのうらにとまりしてのどかにてらすありあけの月
| aki no yo wa nagai no ura ni tomarishite nodoka ni terasu ariake no tsuki | Autumn nights Are long at Nagai Bay Lodging, and Gently shining The dawntime moon. |
Lady Kazusa
41
Right (Win)
秋の夜のくもふきはらふあらしこそ月みるひとのこころなりけれ
| aki no yo no kumo fuki’harau arashi koso tsuki miru hito no kokoro narikere | On an autumn night The clouds a’blowing away, The storm wind, truly, As someone gazing upon the moon Has the selfsame heart! |
Lady Shikibu
42
The poem of the Left certainly imagines the scene just as it is. With that being said, however, the dawntime moon is not present long enough. The Right’s poem simply sounds like one composed by Atsutaka for the ‘Poetry Match held at the Residence of the Former Captain of the Outer Palace Guards, Left Division’.[i] Thus, it’s impossible for me to determine a winner or loser.
It’s a poem which we see in the Poetry Match at Lord Moroyori’s Residence.
冬のよの雲ふきはらふ木枯や月見る人の心なるらむ
| fuyu no yo no kumo fuki’harau kogarashi ya tsuki miru hito no kokoro naruramu | On a winter’s night The clouds a’blowing away, The bitter wind, indeed, As someone gazing upon the moon The same heart seems to have![ii] |
In the poem of the Left, is it the moon or the poet who is lodging at Nagai Bay? If it’s the moon, then ‘lodging’ is erroneous; if it’s the poet, then ‘gently shining’ doesn’t work. In addition to this vagueness, I do also question whether ‘dawntime’ sounds appropriate. As for the Right’s poem, ‘as someone gazing at the moon / Has the selfsame heart!’ is an elegant conception, and the diction is also smooth. It reminds me of an earlier work by someone else. Thus, it wins.
[i] This match has a several different titles, Mototoshi refers to here as both: Zen sa-hyōe no kami no ie no uta’awase 前左兵衛督家歌合 and also Moriyori-kyō no ie uta’awase 師頼卿家歌合, but it is also known as the ‘Poetry Match held by the Late Master of the of the Crown Prince’s Household’ (Ko-tōgū daibu ie uta’awase 故東宮大夫家歌合) and the ‘Poetry held by Moroyori, Captain of the Outer Palace Guards, Right Division’ (U-hyōe no kami moroyori uta’awase 右兵衛督師頼歌合): the text of this match is no longer extant, but it is known to have taken place in the winter Tennin 天仁 2 (1109). Fujiwara no Kiyosuke notes that it was judged by Toshiyori, but Mototoshi disagreed with his assessments and submitted at set of judgements of his own in appeal (Fujioka 1995, 212).
[ii] This poem is included in Shoku shikashū (VI: 293), attributed to Moroyori, with the headnote, ‘Composed on the moon in winter’.
Round Six
Left
あきの夜のありあけのつきはくまもなしあさくらやまもなのみこそあらめ
| aki no yo no ariake no tsuki wa kuma mo nashi asakurayama mo na nomi koso arame | At an autumn night’s Dawn, the moon Has not a cloud before it; The Mount of Morning Dark May be so in name alone! |
Cell of Fragrant Cloud
39
Right (Win)
秋の月あかしのうらはなびきもにすむわれからのかずも見つべし
| aki no tsuki akashi no ura wa nabikimo ni sumu warekara no kazu mo mitsubeshi | The autumn moon is Bright above Akashi Bay; Among the trailing seaweed Dwell tiny shrimp, Their number now clear to my eyes. |
Cell of Compassionate Light
40
The poem of the Left is an entirely tedious composition. It simply states that a cloudless autumn moon does not fit with the place name, Mount Asakura. The moon at ‘dawn’ is the same as the moon at ‘dawntime’, while Mount Asakura is used when dawn has completely finished. As for the poem of the Right, while the moon is described as bright, it doesn’t seem right to then make it a poem about trailing seaweed—this does not seem charming at all. This round, too, there’s not much more I can say than that.
As I have already mentioned, ‘moon at dawn’ in the poem of the Left is an expression which it is impossible to say is praiseworthy. Even more so, really, the concluding ‘may be so in name alone’ just says ‘is so in name alone’, doesn’t it? It’s contrary to reason to say that it’s fluent and thus, and I say this reluctantly, it’s difficult to understand. As for the Right’s poem, I don’t understand this either: it ought to be ‘their numbers, too, I have been able to see’—saying ‘their number now clear to my eyes’ implies that you haven’t previously been able to see them up to that point, and it’s vague about when you have. Even so, it’s getting light, so the light of the moon at dawn seems superior.
Round Two
Left (Win)
秋のよの月のひかりはかはらねどたびのそらこそあはれなりけれ
| aki no yo no tsuki no hikari wa kawaranedo tabi no sora koso aware narikeri | On an autumn night The moon’s light Is unchanged, yet The sky above me on my travels Is so very sad, indeed. |
Lord Saburō
31
Right
あきの夜はたのむる人もなきやどもありあけの月はなほぞまちいづる
| aki no yo wa tanomuru hito mo naki yado mo ariake no tsuki wa nao zo machi’izuru | On an autumn night With no man even expected At my house, It is the dawntime moon’s Appearance that, indeed, I have awaited. |
Ushigimi
32
The poem of the Left seems extremely well-trodden. It resembles a something sung as a popular song. As for the poem of the Right, ‘not…at my house’ is extraordinarily stilted, yet the poems are of the same quality, so I would say these tie.
The poem of the Left’s final ‘Is so very sad, indeed’ sounds pitiful and truly unskilled. The poem of the Right overemphasises ‘even’, and also appears to say that the dawntime moon is an element conveying a moving desolation. I wonder if this is appropriate for the topic of the ‘the moon’ in a poetry match? There needs to be a prior poem as precedent. It does say that the moon’s emergence after having waited for it is something precious, but the poem refers to the moon in the latter part of the month, after the twentieth day, doesn’t it? This would seem to be moving, for sure, but it’s something which doesn’t shed much light, so I would say that the Left wins.
