Round Twelve

Left (T – Win)

わが恋はたかしの浜にゐる田鶴の尋ねてゆかん方もおぼえず

wa ga koi wa takashi no hama ni iru tazu no tazuneteyukan kata mo oboezu

My love is Upon Takashi Beach A resting crane— He will go a’visting, but Where? No one knows…

Lord Tamezane
71

Right (M – Win)

あふことのたのむる人のなきときはよをうき物と思ひぬるかな

au koto no tanomuru hito no naki toki wa yo o uki mono to omoinuru kana

To meet with me Is there no one I can trust— At such times The world is such a cruel place I feel!

Lord Tokimasa
72

Toshiyori states: the poems of both Left and Right seem to be of about the same standard. The first poem displays slightly better technique, but there’s nothing to point out about it. The later poem doesn’t do anything. I would say ‘A resting crane— / He will go a’visiting’ wins.

Mototoshi states: as for the poem about ‘My love is / Upon Takashi Beach’: it really seems to me that if you mention Takashi – heights – then you need to mention waves. After all, in reply to Tadafusa Tsurayuki composed, ‘The waves offshore / Rise high; on the beach at Takashi’, and while there are many beaches, I recklessly feel its mistaken not to have waves linked with Takashi Beach—although, of course, this may be a failing of my elderly mind. The poem of the Right’s ‘feeling in a cruel place’ seems a bit smoother in the current context.