shigure ni wa iori mo sasaji kusamakura oto kiku tote mo nurenu sode ka wa
Caught in a shower, I’d not erect my hut, for Upon a grassy pillow Listening to the sound, still Would my sleeves be soaked!
Tsunemasa 73
Right (Win)
たまもふくいそやがしたにもるしぐれたびねのそでもしほたれよとや
tamamo fuku isoya ga shita ni moru shigure tabine no sode mo shiotareyo to ya
Thatched with gemweed is My roof upon the rocky shore, beneath it Drips a shower, so My sleeves, as I doze upon my travels, Wet with the salty tides – should I say that?
Nakatsuna 74
The Left wonders whether his sleeves would be soaked, listening to the sound of a shower after abandoning all thought of a hut and grassy pillow—this seems extremely charming, but the configuration and sequencing of the Right, beginning with ‘thatched with gemweed’ and continuing with ‘my sleeves, as I doze upon my travels, / Wet with salty tides’, is extremely moving, isn’t it! Thus I have to award a win, once more, to the poem of the Right.
midutori no awoba no yama ya ikanaran kozuwe wo somuru kesa no sigure ni
Waterbird Aoba Mountain – What is to become of you? Your treetops dyed By this morning’s drizzle…
Lord Akinaka 7
Right (Win – Toshinari)
かき曇り海人の小舟に吹く苫の下透るまで時雨しにけり
kakikumori ama no wobune ni Fuku toma no sita toForu made siguresinikeri
Clouds claw in and, Upon the fisherfolk’s tiny boats Do blow; until from the thatch, Right through to beneath, Do the showers fall…
Lord Michitsune 8
Toshinari states: to follow ‘waterbird Aoba Mountain’ (midutori no awoba no yama) with ‘treetops dyed’ (kozuwe wo somuru) is blatantly obvious; in the following poem, while referring to ‘fisherfolk’s tiny boats’ (ama no wobune) is stylistically unexpected, it is not a fault, so I feel it should win.
Mototoshi states: referring to ‘waterbird Aoba Mountain’ (midutori no awoba no yama) is extremely old-fashioned, but the poem of the Right has ‘clouds claw in and, upon the fisherfolks’ tiny boats do blow; until the thatch’ (kakikumori ama no wobune ni fuku toma), which are not things on which spring or summer showers fall, so there is no linking sense with ‘right through to beneath’ (sita toForu made). Thus, I must conclude that showers which dye the treetops is slightly superior.
