雲がくれ鳴きてゆくなる初雁のはつかにみてぞ人はこひしき
| kumogakure nakiteyuku naru hatsukari no hatsuka ni mite zo hito wa koishiki | Hidden in the clouds, Crying, goes The first goose, Faintly glimpsed and yet I do love her so. |
540
Tag Archives: clouds
Kinkai wakashū 525
Kinkai wakashū 523
Eien narabō uta’awase 21
Round Seven
Left
秋の夜はながゐのうらにとまりしてのどかにてらすありあけの月
| aki no yo wa nagai no ura ni tomarishite nodoka ni terasu ariake no tsuki | Autumn nights Are long at Nagai Bay Lodging, and Gently shining The dawntime moon. |
Lady Kazusa
41
Right (Win)
秋の夜のくもふきはらふあらしこそ月みるひとのこころなりけれ
| aki no yo no kumo fuki’harau arashi koso tsuki miru hito no kokoro narikere | On an autumn night The clouds a’blowing away, The storm wind, truly, As someone gazing upon the moon Has the selfsame heart! |
Lady Shikibu
42
The poem of the Left certainly imagines the scene just as it is. With that being said, however, the dawntime moon is not present long enough. The Right’s poem simply sounds like one composed by Atsutaka for the ‘Poetry Match held at the Residence of the Former Captain of the Outer Palace Guards, Left Division’.[i] Thus, it’s impossible for me to determine a winner or loser.
It’s a poem which we see in the Poetry Match at Lord Moroyori’s Residence.
冬のよの雲ふきはらふ木枯や月見る人の心なるらむ
| fuyu no yo no kumo fuki’harau kogarashi ya tsuki miru hito no kokoro naruramu | On a winter’s night The clouds a’blowing away, The bitter wind, indeed, As someone gazing upon the moon The same heart seems to have![ii] |
In the poem of the Left, is it the moon or the poet who is lodging at Nagai Bay? If it’s the moon, then ‘lodging’ is erroneous; if it’s the poet, then ‘gently shining’ doesn’t work. In addition to this vagueness, I do also question whether ‘dawntime’ sounds appropriate. As for the Right’s poem, ‘as someone gazing at the moon / Has the selfsame heart!’ is an elegant conception, and the diction is also smooth. It reminds me of an earlier work by someone else. Thus, it wins.
[i] This match has a several different titles, Mototoshi refers to here as both: Zen sa-hyōe no kami no ie no uta’awase 前左兵衛督家歌合 and also Moriyori-kyō no ie uta’awase 師頼卿家歌合, but it is also known as the ‘Poetry Match held by the Late Master of the of the Crown Prince’s Household’ (Ko-tōgū daibu ie uta’awase 故東宮大夫家歌合) and the ‘Poetry held by Moroyori, Captain of the Outer Palace Guards, Right Division’ (U-hyōe no kami moroyori uta’awase 右兵衛督師頼歌合): the text of this match is no longer extant, but it is known to have taken place in the winter Tennin 天仁 2 (1109). Fujiwara no Kiyosuke notes that it was judged by Toshiyori, but Mototoshi disagreed with his assessments and submitted at set of judgements of his own in appeal (Fujioka 1995, 212).
[ii] This poem is included in Shoku shikashū (VI: 293), attributed to Moroyori, with the headnote, ‘Composed on the moon in winter’.
Tsurayuki uta’awase 11
Love
Left
あまぐもに鳴きわたるなる雁がねはおくれし秋や恋しかるらむ
| amagumo ni nakiwataru naru kari ga ne wa okureshi aki ya koishikaruramu | Through the heavens’ clouds Crying, crossing go The geese, their calls, Delayed, might autumn’s surfeit Make me yearn for you more? |
21
Right
わが心あやしかりけり秋果ててゆくとみるみるなほぞ恋しき
| wa ga kokoro ayashikarikeri aki hatete yuku to mirumiru nao zo koishiki | My heart Feels strange, indeed! Autumn’s done, and I ever watch it leave, yet Still I yearn so strongly… |
22
Eien narabō uta’awase 14
Round Seven
Left
ほととぎすひとこゑなきてすぎぬれどしたふ心ぞちぢにありける
| hototogisu hitokoe nakite suginuredo shitau kokoro zo chiji ni arikeru | The cuckoo A single call cried out, and Passed me by, yet Missing him, my heart He left in a thousand, thousand pieces. |
Lady Kazusa
27
Right (Win)
ほととぎすくものたえまにもる月のかげほのかにもなきわたるかな
| hototogisu kumo no taema ni moru tsuki no kage honoka ni mo nakiwataru kana | The cuckoo, as From a gap between the clouds Drips the moon’s Light, faintly Calls on! |
Lady Shikibu
28
Both poems are of the same quality.
The Left’s poem really makes me wonder why that should be the case, with the final ‘he left’ putting me in mind of someone in court dress who has forgotten to put on his shoes! The Right’s poem appears rather more bright than it needs to be. Furthermore, if one says that the ‘light is faint’ then shouldn’t the moon be hidden by the clouds? It’s vague over that, but if there were a prior poem as precedent, then it would be a good composition. For the present, I will make it the winner.
Eien narabō uta’awase 09
Round Two
Left
をちかたやくも井の山のほととぎすあまつよそにもなきわたるかな
| ochikata ya kumoi no yama no hototogisu ama tsu yoso ni mo nakiwataru kana | From the distant Mount within the clouds A cuckoo In yonder heavens Sings his song! |
Lord Saburō
17
Right
ほととぎすしのだのもりのしのびねをたづねざりせばいかできかまし
| hototogisu shinoda no mori no shinobine o tazunezariseba ikade kikamashi | A cuckoo In Shinoda’s sacred grove Lets out a hushed cry; Had I not come to visit here, How might I have heard it? |
Ushigimi
18
In regards the poem of the Left’s ‘from the distant’ and what follows, extremely recently and colloquially, at the Nakatomi purification ceremony it seems there was a composition, ‘in the distance, below the trees so lush’. This diction is contrary to the expected style of waka and something which occurs only extremely rarely. Truly, one does not compose using such diction in a poetry match. The poem of the Right has nothing of interest about it, yet it also lack faults to mention, so it wins.
This round, neither poem appears bad. The Left has a novel style, while the Right seems cliched, but its expression is smooth. I wonder if we could see these as a tie.
Entō ōn’uta’awase 24
Round Twenty-Four
Left (Tie)
覚束なたれきけとてか時鳥さよふけ方の雲に鳴くらん
| obotsukana tare kike tote ka hototogisu sayo fukegata no kumo ni nakuran | I do not understand— Who is it that you demand hears you, O, cuckoo? Toward brief night’s dawn, Calling from within the clouds… |
Tomoshige
47
Right
待ちかねしよはも昔にかはらねばことしもつらし山時鳥
| machikaneshi yowa mo mukashi ni kawaraneba kotoshi mo tsurashi yamahototogisu | Eagerly awaiting Midnight, to find—as long before— It all unchanged, so This year, too, how cruel is The mountain cuckoo! |
Dharma Master Zenshin
48
Both Left and Right sound suitable. So, they should tie.
Entō ōn’uta’awase 22
Round Twenty-Two
Left (Win)
五月雨にやすらふ暮の時鳥そなたの雲に声なへだてそ
| samidare ni yasurau kure no hototogisu sonata no kumo ni koe na hedate so | In a summer shower, Hesitating, at twilight, O, cuckoo, Let not the intervening clouds Interrupt your song! |
Shō
43
Right
過ぎぬなりさやはちぎりし時鳥なく音ばかりはこぞにかはらで
| suginunari saya wa chigirishi hototogisu naku ne bakari wa kozo ni kawarade | And so you’ve flown by— Is that what you vowed, O, cuckoo? For only the sound of your song Is unchanged from the year before… |
Nagatsuna
44
The Left’s poem doesn’t seem bad. The Right poem’s ‘For only the sound of your song is unchanged from the year before’ is somewhat difficult to grasp—if the cuckoo’s call has not changed, then what has? After all, cuckoos have ‘the voice of yesteryear’[1]—among other references—so it’s obvious that their calls don’t change, so the Left is somewhat better, I think.
[1] KKS III: 137
Entō ōn’uta’awase 19
Round Nineteen
Left (Tie)
なれをしぞあはれとはおもふ時鳥あかず過ぎても歳のへぬれば
| nare o shizo aware to wa omou hototogisu akazu sugite mo toshi no henureba | You, indeed, do Deeply move me O, cuckoo! Never sated am I Through all the passing years… |
The Supernumerary Major Counsellor
37
Right
われならで何をうしとか時鳥ことしも雲のよそに鳴くらん
| ware narade nani o ushi to ka hototogisu kotoshi mo kumo no yoso ni nakuran | Not I, but What is it distresses you so, O, cuckoo? That this year, too, from the clouds Yonder side you seem to sing… |
Lord Nobunari
38
Both Left and Right don’t sound bad, so again this is a tie.
