Tag Archives: dream

Love VIII: 21

Left (Win)
うらやまず臥す猪の床はやすくとも歎も形見寢ぬも契りを

urayamazu
fusu i no toko wa
yasukutomo
nageku mo katami
nenu mo chigiri o
I do not envy
The boar lounging in his bed:
He may be at ease, yet
Grief, too, is a memento;
Lying sleepless marks our bond…

Lord Sada’ie
1061

Right
いかにわれ臥す猪の床に身をかへて夢の程だに契結はん

ika ni ware
fusu i no toko ni
mi o kaete
yume no hodo dani
chigiri musuban
Somehow I
To a boar lounging in his bed
Would change myself, and
For just a brief dream’s length
Would form a bond with you…

Lord Takanobu
1062

The Gentlemen of the Right state: the initial line of the Left’s poem sounds poor. The sense of the ending, too, is difficult to grasp. The Gentlemen of the Left state: we wonder about the appropriateness of changing oneself into a bed.

In judgement:  both Left and Right refer to ‘a boar lounging in his bed’ (fusu i no toko), and it has been mentioned that the initial line of the Left’s poem sounds poor, and that its ending is difficult to grasp. There really are a number of unacceptable aspects to this poem, are there not, so I cannot add any further words to what has been said. The Right’s poem is not suggesting that one change oneself into a bed. It is saying that one should briefly become a boar, that one might dream briefly of love. How can one possibly see the dream of a boar lying asleep? It certainly seems inferior to ‘not envying a lounging boar’.

Love V: 5

Left (Tie).
言はぬ間は思ふも心九十九髪さは僞りの夢や見てまし

iwanu ma wa
omou mo kokoro
tukumogami
sa wa itsuwari no
yume ya mitemashi
While he’s said not a word,
If love in his heart
Arrived for my white hair,
Then a false dream
Would I see in truth?

Lord Kanemune.
849

Right.
戀初めし心の色に積む年は我黒髪に現れにけり

koi someshi
kokoro no iro ni
tsumu toshi wa
wa ga kurogami ni
arawarenikeri
Since I first awoke to love
The hues of passion in my heart by
The drifting years
Upon my raven tresses
Are made clear.

Nobusada.
850

The Right state: is this a reference to the recent poem ‘seeing a dream with white hair’ (yume o miru to mo tsukumogami)? The Left state: ‘drifting years’ (tsumu toshi) is grating on the ear.

In judgement: both poems refer to hair, and the Gentlemen of the Right have asked whether the Left are referring to a ‘recent poem’, and I wonder when this poem might have been composed? It is impossible to entirely avoid referring to poems which are not included in the anthologies. Needless to say, though, it is normal for one’s poems not to resemble others to a great extent. In addition, I do not feel that ‘drifting years’ is that grating on the ear. However, simply saying ‘Upon my raven tresses are made clear’ (wa ga kurogami ni arawarenikeri) does not convey a strong sense of gray hair, I think. Finally, the configuration of the Left’s ‘then a false dream’ (sa wa itsuwari no) is particularly unacceptable, I think. So, a tie.

 

Yoshinobu-shū 257

現とも夢とも見えぬ程ばかり通はばゆるせ下紐の関

ututu tomo
yume tomo mienu
Fodo bakari
kayoFaba yuruse
sitaFimo no seki
If it’s a dream, or
If it’s real, I know not, so
While I am unsure
If I should come, permit me
The barrier of  Shitahimo – your under-belt!

Ōnakatomi no Yoshinobu (921-991)
大中臣能宣

Love IV: 18

Left (Win).
雲となり雨となるてふ中空の夢にも見えよ夜半ならずとも

kumo to nari
ame to naru chō
nakazora no
yume ni mo mieyo
yowa narazu tomo
Whether you become clouds, or
Whether you become rain
In the heart of the heavens
Let me glimpse you in a dream,
Though nighttime it is not…

Lord Ari’ie.
815

Right.
暮ぬ間はかゝりせばや山鳥も夜半に思ひに契り變へけん

kurenu ma wa
kakariseba ya
yamadori mo
yowa ni omoi ni
chigirikaeken
The hours with no darkness:
Is it because they are so?
As the pheasants do
At night to thoughts of love
Can we vow to turn?

Ietaka.
816

The Right state: we find no particular faults to mention. The Left state: the mention of ‘pheasants’ (yamadori) comes a bit abruptly, does it not?

In judgement: the style of the Left’s poem sounds utterly elegant and beautiful. The Right’s mention of ‘pheasants’ is unnecessary. Thus, the Left wins.