Composed when he was exiled to Oki.
おもひきやひなのわかれにおとろへてあまのなはたきいさりせんとは
| omoFiki ya Fina no wakare ni otoroFete ama no naFataki izarisen to Fa | I would not have thought it! Parted, in the boondocks and All at a loss, so As a fisherman, I shall take line in hand And fish away… |
Lord [Ono no] Takamura
Left (Win)
さざ浪や志賀津の海士になりにけりみるめはなくて袖のしほるる
| sazanami ya shigatsu no ama ni narinikeri mirume wa nakute sode no shioruru | Rocked by wavelets A fisherman at Shiga Bay Have I become! Glimpsing no seaweed, How my sleeves are soaked… |
Lord Suetsune
1171
Right
伊勢の海の底までかづく海人なれやみるめに人を思ふ心は
| ise no umi no soko made kazuku ama nare ya mirume ni hito o omou kokoro wa | At Ise, to the sea Bed dive Fisher-girls: Am I one, too? A seaweed-tangled glimpse of you Lodging in my heart… |
Jakuren
1172
The Right state: the Left’s poem has no faults to mention. The Left state: neither beginning nor end is sufficiently forcefully expressed.
In judgement: the conception and configuration of the Left’s ‘fisherman at Shiga Bay’ (shigatsu no ama) certainly seem splendid. That is really all there is to say about this poem. To make a deliberate point of seeking out elements which sound difficult is a pointless activity for the Way of Poetry and an individual poet. As for the Right’s poem, diving ‘to the sea bed’ (soko made) is just something that fisher-girls do. The Left must win.
Left (Win)
潮風の吹こす海人の苫ひさし下に思ひのくゆる頃かな
| shiokaze no fukikosu ama no toma hisashi shita ni omoi no kuyuru koro kana | The tidewinds Blow across the fisher girl’s Rush-woven roof; Below, in fires of passion Does she smoulder… |
A Servant Girl
1165
Right
みさごゐる磯良が崎にあさりする海士もみるめを猶求めけり
| misago iru isora ga saki ni asarisuru ama mo mirume o nao motomekeri | Ospreys hunt Along the strand at Isora; Digging for clams, The fisherman, a seaweed-strewn chance at love Is seeking still… |
The Supernumerary Master of the Empress’ Household Office
1166
Left and Right together state: we find no faults to mention.
In judgement: the Left’s ‘blow across the fisher girl’s rush-woven roof’ (fukikosu ama no toma hisashi) is certainly elegant. The Right’s ‘ospreys hunt along the strand at Isora’ (misago iru isora ga saki) seems a kind of overblown style, yet the Left seems particularly pleasant in form. I make it the winner.