Tag Archives: fune

San’i minamoto no hirotsune ason uta’awase 6

Wisteria blooming by a river bank

Left
さだめなく吹く風なれば池水のきしをめぐりてよする藤なみ

sadamenaku
fuku kaze nareba
ikemizu no
kishi o megurite
yosuru Fujinami
Inconstant is
The gusting wind, so
By the pondwater’s
Bank and all along it
Break wisteria waves…

Fujiwara no Munenari
11

Right

藤なみのかからぬ岸のなければやこぎくる舟のよるひまのなき

fujinami no
kakaranu kishi no
nakereba ya
kogikuru fune no
yoru hima no naki
Untouched by wisteria waves
Such a bank
Is there not one?
Come rowing, the boats
Have not a moment to make shore.

Lesser Superintendant Fujiwara no Sadamitsu
12

Love X: 6

Left (Win)
誰となく寄せては返る浪枕浮きたる舟の跡もとどめず

tare to naku
yosete wa kaeru
namimakura
ukitaru fune no
ato mo todomezu
To no one
Cleaving, they return;
Pillowed on the waves
The drifting boats’
Wakes fail to linger long…

A Servant Girl
1151

Right
何方を見ても忍ばむ難波女の浮き寝の跡に消ゆる白浪

izukata o
mitemo shinobamu
naniwame no
ukine no ato ni
kiyuru shiranami
Whither
Should I look in longing?
With a girl from Naniwa
I slept briefly, but her
Wake vanishes among the whitecaps…

Jakuren
1152

Both Left and Right together state: neither poem is bad.

In judgement: both poems seem elegant in configuration and diction, but the Right’s ‘girl from Naniwa’ (naniwame) raises the same issue as ‘diving girl’, only more so – there is not even evidence on this from inclusion in the Collection of Poems to Sing, is there? The Left’s ‘cleaving, they return; pillowed on the waves’ (yosete wa kaeru namimakura) really does seem like a pleasure girl, so I must say it is superior.

Love X: 5

Left (Win)
心通ふゆききの舟のながめにもさしてかばかり物は思はじ

kokoro kayou
yukiki no fune no
nagame ni mo
sashite ka bakari
mono wa omowaji
Her heart goes out
On the back-and-forth of boats
That fill her gaze, but
Surely her
Thoughts will not be as mine…

Lord Sada’ie
1149

Right
舟のうち浪の上なる浮き寝には立ち帰るとて袖ぞ濡れける

fune no uchi
nami no ue naru
ukine ni wa
tachikaeru tote
sode zo nurekeru
Within a boat,
Atop the waves
I sleep but briefly and
When I am to leave,
How soaked are my sleeves…

Lord Tsune’ie
1150

As the previous round.

In judgement: the use of ‘surely’ (sashite) in the final section of the Left’s poem sounds like it has been deliberately used to evoke a connection with the earlier ‘boat’ (fune). The initial section of the Right’s poem draws, yet again, on Mochitoki’s over-long line. The latter section also sounds like a deliberate use of evocative language, and the final line lacks impact. It is inferior to the Left’s poem.

Love X: 4

Left (Tie)
舟のうちにさしも浮きたる契までうらやむ程のえにこそ有けれ

fune no uchi ni
sashimo ukitaru
chigiri made
urayamu hodo no
e ni koso arikere
Within a boat
Such a brief
Bond is formed; yet
Do I envy it,
I really do!

Lord Ari’ie
1147

Right
その人と分きて待つらん妻よりもあはれは深き浪の上哉

sono hito to
wakite matsuran
tsuma yori mo
aware wa fukaki
nami no ue kana
There is her, and
My waiting
Wife:
Far fonder am I
Upon the waves!

Nobusada
1148

Left and Right state: neither has any fault.

In judgement: the configuration and diction of both poems sounds pleasant. I must make this a tie.