照る月を昼かと見れば暁に羽核搔く鴫もあらじとそ思ふ
teru tuki wo Firu ka to mireba akatuki ni Fane kaku sigi mo arazi to zo omoFu |
The shining moon Makes it seem like noon, so With the dawn, Beating their wings, even the snipe Have gone, I feel. |
Ki no Tsurayuki
紀貫之
照る月を昼かと見れば暁に羽核搔く鴫もあらじとそ思ふ
teru tuki wo Firu ka to mireba akatuki ni Fane kaku sigi mo arazi to zo omoFu |
The shining moon Makes it seem like noon, so With the dawn, Beating their wings, even the snipe Have gone, I feel. |
Ki no Tsurayuki
紀貫之
Left.
歸りつる今朝こそあらめいかにこは干る間も知らぬ袖の氣色ぞ
kaeritsuru kesa koso arame ika ni ko wa hiru ma mo shiranu sode no keshiki zo |
Having come home This morning, I am certain, Why is it that A daytime dry moment is a stranger To my sleeves? |
Lord Kanemune.
809
Right.
をのづから暮れ行く空を待つ程も頼むことゝは夢路成けり
onozukara kureyuku sora o matsu hodo mo tanomu koto to wa yumeji narikeri |
While I For darkening skies Do wait, The only thing in which I can place my trust Is the path of dreams. |
Jakuren.
810
The Right state: we find no particular faults to mention. The Left state: we wonder about the appropriateness of placing one’s trust in dreams during the daytime. Was he having a nap?
In judgement: the conception of the Left’s poem is well developed from beginning to end. The Right’s poem has an elegant configuration, but it is unacceptable to have the speaker napping. However, the Left’s ‘Why is it that’ (ika ni ko wa) is unsatisfactory style. I have to say the poems are equal and tie.
Left.
物思へばひま行く駒も忘られてくらす涙を先おさふらん
mono’omoeba hima yuku koma mo wasurarete kurasu namida o mazu osauran |
Sunk in gloomy thought, That the hours had flown so fast I did forget; First, the tears shadowing my sight I should suppress… |
A Servant Girl.
805
Right (Win).
人知れぬ戀忘れ貝拾ひかね塩の干る間も袖は濡れけり
hito shirenu koi wasuregai hiroikane shio no hiru ma mo sode wa nurekeri |
Unknown to all is My love, and a forgotten mussel shell I could not find, so Even when the beach is daytime dry My sleeves are soaked. |
The Provisional Master of the Empress’ Household Office.
806
The Right state: while ‘shadowed’ (kakikurasu) is a normal turn of phrase, we find ‘tears shadowing my sight’ (kurasu namida) to be unsatisfactory. The Left state: we wonder about the appropriateness of using shio no hiru ma alone for a play on words with hiru.
In judgement: The Left’s ‘That the hours had flown so fast I did forget’ (hima yuku koma mo wasurarete) gives the impression that the conception of the poem ought to be of waiting for dusk, but ‘First, the tears shadowing my sight I should suppress’ (kurasu namida o mazu osauran) seems to be something entirely different. As for the Right’s ‘Even when the beach is daytime dry my sleeves are soaked’ (shio no hiru ma mo sode wa nurekeri), I ask you, how can you think daytime isn’t a part of the phrase? The Right must win.