shinobine o wa ga sode nomi to omoishi o otorazarikeri hagi no shitazuyu
Secretly Upon my sleeves, alone, I thought, but ‘Twas not lesser than The dewfall ‘neath the bush clover.
Minor Captain Kin’nori, Fourth Rank 17
Right
色かはる萩の下葉の露けさは我が身のうへと成りにけるかな
iro kawaru hagi no shitaba no tsuyukesa wa wa ga mi no ue to narinikeru kana
A change of hue To the bush clover’s underleaves Drenched with dew— Upon my sorry self Has it befallen, too!
Tadasue, Senior Assistant Minister of the Sovereign’s Household 18
The image of the droplets of secretly wept upon the poet’s sleeves not being less than those of the dewdrops beneath the bush clover appears extremely charming and moving. In addition, the pain expressed by one’s sorry self being as dew-drenched as the bush clover’s underleaves—this has left my own sleeves, both left and right, seeming as soaked with dewdrops from the bush clover.
itodoshiku teri koso masare momijiba ni hikage utsurou ama no kagoyama
All the more Brightly do shine The scarlet leaves Reflecting the sunshine On heavenly Mount Kago!
Minor Captain Lord Kin’nori, Fourth Rank 7
Right
天の原時雨にくもるけふしもぞ紅葉の色はてりまさりける
ama no hara shigure ni kumoru kyō shimo zo momiji no iro wa terimasarikeru
The plain of heaven is Clouded with showers, but Today for certain The hues of the scarlet leaves Shine most bright.
The Daughter of His Excellency, the Head 8
Considering the Left’s ‘Reflecting the sunshine / On heavenly Mount Kago’ about scarlet leaves reflecting the sun’s light, gives me the feeling that this must be a mistaken reference to the garlands of scarlet clubmoss worn by minor officiants at the Great Thanksgiving Service. In addition, among all of the many mountains in various places whose leaves turn scarlet, it seems something of a stretch to go so far as to mention Heavenly Mount Kago, considering it is an archaic expression found in the Collection of a Myriad Leaves, among other places. The Right’s ‘Clouded with showers, but / Today for certain’ is an expression perfectly in tune with the topic, making one wonder whether the leaves’ hue is the result of single drenching which has dyed them superbly.
midori naru matsukage hitasu ikemizu ni chiyo no sumika to miyuru yado kana
Evergreen The pine tree’s shapes sink Into the pond waters— A residence for a thousand ages Does that dwelling seem!
Lord Dainagon 57
Right (Win)
ちとせともいろにはいでていはし水ながれむほどは君がよなれば
chitose to mo iro ni wa idete iwashimizu nagaremu hodo wa kimi ga yo nareba
For a thousand years or more Does its hue emerge— Spring waters from the rocks Might flow as long as My Lord’s reign will be, so…
Lord Chūnagon 58
What on earth might be the colour of the Left poem’s ‘pine tree’s shapes sink’ and the Right poem’s ‘thousand years’ hue’? When one talks about ‘hue’ that means ‘scarlet’ and, in addition, it’s used of blossoms or autumn leaves. I have yet to see wisteria colouring the water in numerous private collections. The two poems are about the same, but the Right is marred by a series of faults.
The Left’s ‘shapes sink’ is extremely vague. ‘Sink’ means to submerge an object in water. One could certainly compose about a pine tree’s branches sinking, but how can we accept ‘shapes sink’ to mean an object’s reflection from beneath the water in the absence of a poem as precedent? The end is extremely, charming, though.
The poem of the Right doesn’t have anything special about it. It’s a pedestrian affair which doesn’t seem to show much evidence of thought. How are we to distinguish between a poem which is hackneyed but lacking any faults and one which is vague?
aki sugite hanazakari naru kiku no hana iro ni taguite aki ya kaereru
Autumn is past and The flowers richly blooming are Chrysanthemums: With their hues Autumn does return!
Korenori 3
なみとのみうちこそみゆれすみのえのきしにのこれるしらぎくのはな
nami to nomi uchi koso miyure suminoe no kishi ni nokoreru shiragiku no hana
Simply as waves Do they, indeed, appear! At Suminoe Lingering on the shore White chrysanthemum blooms.
Korenori 4
わぎもこがひもゆふぐれのきくなればあかずぞはなのいろはみえける
wagimoko ga hi mo yūgure no kiku nareba akazu zo hana no iro wa miekeru
My darling girl Both day and eve is As a chrysanthemum, so Never sated am I with this flower’s Hues I see.
Korenori 5
きくのはなふゆののかぜにちりもせでけふまでとてやしもはおくらん
kiku no hana fuyu no kaze ni chiri mo sede kyō made tote ya shimo wa okuran
Chrysanthemum blooms In the winter wind Scatter not; Is it that up to today is when Frost is said to fall?
Korenori 6
かげさへやこよひはにほふきくのはなあまてるつきにかのそはるらん
kage sae ya koyoi wa niou kiku no hana ama teru tsuki ni ka no sowaruran
Even their shape Fills tonight with a scented glow; Chrysanthemum blooms To the heaven-shining moon Seem to add their fragrance.
Korenori 7
[i] Fujiwara no Suetada/Suenawa 藤原季縄 (?-919). Little is known of Suetada’s life, other than that he was apparently close to Ise 伊勢 and exchanged poems with her. The circumstances of his death, however, are recorded in Yamato monogatari, which relates that he fell ill in Engi 19 (919) when he held the position of Minor Captain in the Inner Palace Guards, Right Division (Ukonoe shōshō右近衛少将). On a day when he was due to be in attendance at the palace, he sent a message to Minamoto no Kintada 源公忠 (889-948), a Chamberlain and the Assistant Director of the Bureau of Housekeeping, to say that illness prevented his being there. Kintada replied that he should attend without fail on the day after tomorrow, but when that day came, Suetada sent him the following poem:
くやしくぞ のちにあはむと 契りける 今日をかぎりと 言はましものを
kuyashiku zo nochi ni awamu to chigirikeru kyō o kagiri to iwamashi mono o
I am struck with bitterness! Once more would we meet Did I vow, but Today I meet my end— That is what I would say…
SKKS VIII: 854
Concerned, Kintada ordered up a carriage and went immediately to Suetada’s residence, only to find he had died before he arrived. Greatly downcast, he returned to the palace and reported Suetada’s death to the emperor.
tsuyu sugaru niwa no hagiwara irozukinu ika naru hito no omoisomuran
All clung with dew, The bush clover grove in the grounds Has taken on such hues, that I wonder who it is Might have just fallen into passion’s flames?
Chikanari 61
Right (Win)
おく露は秋のならひの萩が枝にあまるや雁の涙なるらん
oku tsuyu wa aki no narai no hagi ga e ni amaru ya kari no namida naruran
Dewdrops falling is Autumn’s custom for The bush clover branches, but Added to them are the goose Tears, perhaps?[1]
Ie’kiyo 62
The Left’s poem has a person’s feelings being dyed by the bush-clover, but I cannot think why this should be? The Right’s poem seems particularly pleasant. Thus, it wins.
[1] An allusive variation on: Composed on the occasion of a poetry competition at Prince Koresada’s house. 秋の夜のつゆをばつゆとおきながらかりの涙やのべをそむらむ aki no yo no / tsuyu oba tsuyu to / okinagara / kari no namida ya / nobe o somuran ‘On Autumn nights / The dew as dewdrops / Falls, but, / Perhaps goose tears / Stain the fields?’ Mibu no Tadamine (KKS V: 258)
akihagi no tsuyu mo yosuga no sagariba mo kaze fukitatsuru iro zo mi ni shimu
On the autumn bush clover Dewdrops rest upon The dangling leaves, Whipped up by the wind, Their hues sharply sink into my flesh.
The Former Minister of the Centre 51
Right (Win)
さだめなき風を待つ間もうつろひぬもとあらの萩にむすぶ白露
sadamenaki kaze o matsu ma mo utsuroinu motoara no hagi ni musubu shiratsuyu
While the unsettled Breeze they do await, Faded from The sparse bush clover have The clinging dewdrops.[1]
Kozaishō 52
The Left poem’s ‘rest upon the dangling leaves, whipped up by the wind’ seems a novel style, and yet, even though everything about dangling leaves is contained in the Ancient and Modern, it does not sound particularly evocative. The Right lacks even a small fault and appears gorgeous, so it should win.
[1] An allusive variation on: Topic unknown. 宮木野のもとあらの小萩つゆをおもみ風をまつごと君をこそまつ miyagino no / motoara no kohagi / tsuyu o omomi / kaze o matsu goto / kimi o koso matsu ‘On Miyagi Plain / The sparse bush clover / Weighed down with dewdrops / Awaits the wind, just as / I do wait for you…’ Anonymous (KKS XIV: 694)
