いかにしてかげをも見まし沢田川袖つくほどの契りなりとも
| ika ni shite kage o mo mimashi sawadagawa sode tsuku hodo no chigiri naritomo |
What am I to do? I would see her face; Though Sawada River Striking upon my sleeves Should be our bond! |
Tag Archives: kage
KKS XX: 1095
KKS XV: 764
Genji monogatari 107
梓弓入佐の山にまとふかなほの見し月の影や見ゆると
| adusa yumi irusa no yama ni matoFu kana Fonomishi tuki no kage ya miyuru to |
A catalpa bow At Mount Irusa is aimed; Is aimed; Dimly glimpsed, that moon, Will I see her light once more? |
Genji Monogatari 71
Autumn III: 28
Left (Win).
九月の有明の空を見て後ぞ秋のあはれの果ては知りぬる
| nagatsuki no ariake no sora o mite nochi zo aware no hate wa shirinuru |
In the Longest Month At dawn, the skies I’ve seen, and That there is nothing more sad Have I come to know. |
475
Right.
暮れて行秋もそなたぞ恨めしき傾く月の影を見しより
| kureteyuku aki mo sonata zo urameshiki katabuku tsuki no kage o mishi yori |
Turning to dusk Is autumn, too; that direction I despise, with The sinking moon’s Light in my sight! |
476
As the previous round.
Shunzei’s judgement: The Left’s ‘At dawn, the skies I’ve seen’ (ariake no sora o mite nochi zo) and the Right’s ‘The sinking moon’s light in my sight!’ (katabuku tsuki no kage o mishi yori), in terms of configuration, have neither strengths nor faults [sugata shōretsu naki], but ‘that direction’ (sonata zo) sounts overly simplistic [kotozokite kikoe]. Thus, the Left must win.
Autumn III: 15
Left.
今日といへばやがて籬の白菊ぞ尋し人の袖と見えける
| kyō to ieba yagate magaki no shiragiku zo tazuneshi hito no sode to miekeru |
On this day At last, along my lattice fence White chrysanthemums: Seeming like the sleeves of One who came to call… |
449
Right.
さか月に浮べる今日の影よりやうつろひ初むる白菊の花
| sakazuki ni ukaberu kyō no kage yori ya uturoisomuru shiragiku no hana |
In my wine cup Floating on this day: Does the moonlight Bring on changing hues For white chrysanthemum blooms? |
450
The Right say that having the phrase ‘at last, along my lattice fence’ (yagate magaki no) continuing one from the other is ‘unsatisfactory’ [kokoroyukazu]. The Left say that the Right’s phrasing sounds as if the change in colour is brought about by the blossom floating in the wine cup, rather than the moonlight, and query if this is appropriate.
Shunzei’s judgement: Is the Left’s ‘at last, along my lattice fence’ that poor [ashiku ya wa]? Furthermore, the Right’s poem simply means ‘when floating in the wine cup’ the colours ‘change’. Neither poem has any conspicuous faults [tomo ni toganaku kikoyu]. The round should tie.
Autumn II: 27
Left (Win).
心こそ雲井はるかにあくがれめ眺めも誘ふ廣澤の月
| kokoro koso kumoi harukani akugareme nagame mo sasou hirosawa no tsuki |
My heart To the distant heavens Is drawn Pulled in by the sight Of the moon at Hirosawa. |
413
Right.
月の澄む空は外にも變らじを眼に餘る廣澤の影
| tsuki no sumu sora wa yoso ni mo kawaraji wo manako ni amaru hirosawa no kage |
The moon, so clearly lodged Within the skies, distant yet Unchanging: The sight can never sate my eyes Light on Hirosawa. |
414
The Right complain that in the Left’s poem the phrase ‘moon at Hirosawa’ (hirosawa no tsuki) is ‘grating on the ear’. The Left respond that ‘The sight can never sate my eyes light on Hirosawa’ (manako ni amaru hirosawa no kage) in the Right’s poem is, too.
Shunzei’s judgement: The Left’s ‘moon at Hirosawa’, I do not feel to be grating. What sort of expression, though is ‘pulled in by the sight’ (nagame mo sasou)? The Right is reminiscent of expressions like ‘all four corners of the world do not exhaust my gaze’, which when one hear’s them in Chinese poetry are remarkable, but sound wrong in a Japanese poem, and are even incomprehensible! ‘The moon at Hirosawa’ is, perhaps, more interesting. Thus, the Left wins.
Autumn I: 13
Left (Win).
影宿す程なき袖の露の上に馴れても疎き宵の稲妻
| kage yadosu hodo naki sode no tsuyu no ue ni naretemo utoki yoi no inazuma |
The light dwells But for an instant on my sleeves Where dewdrops rest; Accustomed to it though I am, how distant is Lightning in the evening. |
325
Right.
むば玉の闇をあらはす稲妻も光の程ははかなかりけり
| mubatama no yami o arawasu inazuma mo hikari no hodo wa hakanakarikeri |
Lily-seed Dark, broken by Lightning; The flash, So brief. |
326
Neither team can find fault with the other’s poem this round.
Shunzei feels, ‘The spirit of “an instant on my sleeves” (hodo naki sode) is particularly fine, is it not? Prefacing “dark, broken by” (yami o arawasu) with “lily-seed” (mubatama no), seems somewhat overblown, and then concluding with “so brief” (hakanakarikeri) contradicts the initial statement. “Lightning in the evening” (yoi no inazuma) should win.’
Autumn I: 6
Left.
打ち寄する浪より秋の龍田川さても忘れぬ柳陰かな
| uchiyosuru nami yori aki no tatsutagawa satemo wasurenu yanagikage kana |
Approaching on The waves, comes autumn to The Tatsuta River; And yet, I cannot forget The willows’ shade. |
311
Right.
秋淺き日影に夏は殘れども暮るゝ籬は荻の上風
| aki asaki hikage ni natsu wa nokoredomo kururu magaki wa ogi no uwakaze |
Faintly autumnal is The sunlight, with summer Yet remaining; At evening by the rough-woven fence Blows a breeze o’er the silver-grass. |
312
The Right say the Left’s poem is ‘particularly good.’ The Left state that, ‘“Faintly autumnl” (aki asaki) grates on the ear, and we also cannot grasp the use of “evening by the rough-woven fence” (kururu magaki).’
Shunzei states, ‘The Left’s “approaching on the waves” (nami yori aki no), seems particularly charming, but when taken together with “willows’ shade” (yanagi kade)– the Tatsuta River has long been the subject of composition on “flowing scarlet autumn leaves”, and even now this gives a slightly poetic effect; “willows’ shade” has been used in composition, both in ancient times and more recently, but does it not seem commonplace now? The Right’s poem is in the same vein as that of the Right in Round One Hundred and Fifty-Two, yet I do not find “faintly autumnal” to be unpleasant. “Evening by the rough-woven fence”, too, has charm. The Left’s poem has vocabulary in accordance with the contents; the Right unusual expressions. In this combination, the round must tie.’