Tag Archives: kesa

Love IV: 15

Left.
歸りつる今朝こそあらめいかにこは干る間も知らぬ袖の氣色ぞ

kaeritsuru
kesa koso arame
ika ni ko wa
hiru ma mo shiranu
sode no keshiki zo
Having come home
This morning, I am certain,
Why is it that
A daytime dry moment is a stranger
To my sleeves?

Lord Kanemune.
809

Right.
をのづから暮れ行く空を待つ程も頼むことゝは夢路成けり

onozukara
kureyuku sora o
matsu hodo mo
tanomu koto to wa
yumeji narikeri
While I
For darkening skies
Do wait,
The only thing in which I can place my trust
Is the path of dreams.

Jakuren.
810

The Right state: we find no particular faults to mention. The Left state: we wonder about the appropriateness of placing one’s trust in dreams during the daytime. Was he having a nap?

In judgement: the conception of the Left’s poem is well developed from beginning to end. The Right’s poem has an elegant configuration, but it is unacceptable to have the speaker napping. However, the Left’s ‘Why is it that’ (ika ni ko wa) is unsatisfactory style. I have to say the poems are equal and tie.