kyō made mo kozue wa fuyu no iro nagara kozo ni wa kawaru yuki no shitagusa
Until today The treetops winter’s Hues did hold, but With the change to the year before Grasses grow up ‘neath the snow.
Lord Yasusue 173
Right
くれはどりあやにながめのなりゆくかみどりの空にあそぶいとゆふ
kurehadori aya ni nagame no nariyuku ka midori no sora ni asobu itoyū
A chequered Pattern–when I gaze out how strange It becomes: In the verdant skies Sports heat haze…
The Minister of the Centre 174
Although it sounds a bit difficult to grasp the sense of the Left’s ‘grasses ‘neath the snow with the change to the year before’, there’s nothing wrong with composing about grasses growing beneath fallen snow, so the configuration is pleasant. The Right’s poem, too, has no faults to mention, so this round, too, should tie.
samidare ni yasurau kure no hototogisu sonata no kumo ni koe na hedate so
In a summer shower, Hesitating, at twilight, O, cuckoo, Let not the intervening clouds Interrupt your song!
Shō 43
Right
過ぎぬなりさやはちぎりし時鳥なく音ばかりはこぞにかはらで
suginunari saya wa chigirishi hototogisu naku ne bakari wa kozo ni kawarade
And so you’ve flown by— Is that what you vowed, O, cuckoo? For only the sound of your song Is unchanged from the year before…
Nagatsuna 44
The Left’s poem doesn’t seem bad. The Right poem’s ‘For only the sound of your song is unchanged from the year before’ is somewhat difficult to grasp—if the cuckoo’s call has not changed, then what has? After all, cuckoos have ‘the voice of yesteryear’[1]—among other references—so it’s obvious that their calls don’t change, so the Left is somewhat better, I think.
