Tag Archives: lattice fence

Autumn III: 15

Left.

今日といへばやがて籬の白菊ぞ尋し人の袖と見えける

kyō to ieba
yagate magaki no
shiragiku zo
tazuneshi hito no
sode to miekeru
On this day
At last, along my lattice fence
White chrysanthemums:
Seeming like the sleeves of
One who came to call…

Lord Kanemune.

449

Right.

さか月に浮べる今日の影よりやうつろひ初むる白菊の花

sakazuki ni
ukaberu kyō no
kage yori ya
uturoisomuru
shiragiku no hana
In my wine cup
Floating on this day:
Does the moonlight
Bring on changing hues
For white chrysanthemum blooms?

Ietaka.

450

The Right say that having the phrase ‘at last, along my lattice fence’ (yagate magaki no) continuing one from the other is ‘unsatisfactory’ [kokoroyukazu]. The Left say that the Right’s phrasing sounds as if the change in colour is brought about by the blossom floating in the wine cup, rather than the moonlight, and query if this is appropriate.

Shunzei’s judgement: Is the Left’s ‘at last, along my lattice fence’ that poor [ashiku ya wa]? Furthermore, the Right’s poem simply means ‘when floating in the wine cup’ the colours ‘change’. Neither poem has any conspicuous faults [tomo ni toganaku kikoyu]. The round should tie.