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Winter II: 7

Left (Win).

雪のうちに猶も緑の色ながら千世をあらはす嶺の若松

yuki no uchi ni
nao mo midori no
iro nagara
chiyo o arawasu
mine no wakamatsu
In amongst the snows,
Yet still does the fresh, green
Hue remain;
A thousand years made manifest in
The young pines on the peak.

Lord Suetsune.

553

Right.

今朝見れば雪高砂の松が枝は土につくまで降り積みにけり

kesa mireba
yuki takasago no
matsu ga e wa
tsuchi ni tsuku made
furitsuminikeri
Looking on this morning
The snow has reached such heights
The pine boughs are
Bent down to the ground,
Buried by the fall…

Lord Tsune’ie.

554

The Right find no fault with the Left’s poem. The Left state that the Right’s poem is ‘lacking in sense’.

Shunzei’s judgement: The Left’s ‘A thousand years made manifest in the young pines on the peak’ (chiyo o arawasu mine no wakamatsu) is charming [okashiku miehaberu], but the in the phrase ‘Yet still does the fresh, green’ (nao mo midori no), the use of ‘still’ (mo) is old-fashioned, and including it produces a phrasing which is inferior to ‘yet’ (nao) alone. When I say such things, people may find them difficult to accept, but not to do so would do the Way a disservice, and thus, I must. The Right’s ‘The pine boughs are bent down to the ground’ (matsu ga e wa tsuchi ni tsuku made) is something which has been used in poetry since long ago, and so is somewhat commonplace [tsune no koto], but ‘such heights the pine’ (takasago no matsu) does not seem that bad [ito masanakuhaberuran]. The Left’s ‘young pines on the peak’ (mine no wakamatsu) should win.

Winter II: 6

Left (Tie).

雲深き嶺の朝明けのいかならん槇の戸白む雪の光に

kumo fukaki
mine no asake no
ika naran
maki no to shiramu
yuki no hikari ni
Deep within the clouds,
Morning to the peaks must come,
But how? I wonder,
With whitening round my cedar door,
Brightened by the snow…

A Servant Girl.

551

Right.

眺めやる衣手寒し有明の月より殘る峰の白雪

nagameyaru
koromode samushi
ariake no
tsuki yori nokoru
mine no shirayuki
Gazing on,
How chill my sleeves;
The dawntime
Moon will linger less than
The snowfall on the peaks…

Jakuren.

552

Both teams say they find the other’s poem moving.

Shunzei’s judgement: The Left’s poem has ‘deep snow’ (yuki fukaki), ‘whitening round my cedar door’ (maki no to shiramu), and the Right has ‘the dawntime moon will linger less than’ (ariake no tsuki yori nokoru) – the conception and diction of both are splendid [kokoro kotoba tomo ni yoroshiku koso haberumere]. It seems to me that is exactly how winter mornings are. Thus, it is difficult to say which is better. This must be a good tie [yoki ji].

Winter I: 6

Left (Tie).

散果てん木葉の音を殘しても色こそなけれ嶺の松風

chirihaten
ko no ha no oto o
nokoshitemo
iro koso nakere
mine no matsukaze
Completely scattered
Are the leaves, but the sound
Remains
Lacking only the hue
As the wind blows through the pines on the peak.

A Servant Girl.

491

Right.

時雨ゆく松の緑は空晴て嵐にくもる峰の紅葉葉

shigure yuku
matsu no midori wa
sora harete
arashi ni kumoru
mine no momijiba
Is drizzle falling
On the pines so green?
The skies are clear,
Clouded only by a storm
Of scarlet leaves from the peaks…

Jakuren.

492

The Right have no criticisms to make of the Left’s poem. The Left state that they find the Right’s poem, ‘difficult to grasp’. In reply, the Right say, ‘It is conceived after a Chinese poem that “the wind in the pines is the sound of rain”.’

Shunzei’s judgement: The Left’s poem is excellent in both configuration and diction [sugata kotoba yoroshiku haberumere]. The Right’s ‘clouded only by a storm’ (arashi ni kumoru) sounds charming in conception [kokoro okashiku kikoyu] – even without drawing upon the Chinese model. In this round, too, there is no clear winner or loser and it must tie.

Winter I: 5

Left.

はかなしや浮きたる風に誘はれていづち生田の杜の木葉ぞ

hakanashi ya
ukitaru kaze ni
sasowarete
izuchi ikuta no
mori no konoha zo
How fleeting!
The fickle wind
Beckons, but
Where does Ikuta’s
Sacred grove send its leaves?

Lord Suetsune.

489

Right.

惜しみかね嶺の紅葉に染置きし心の色も散り果てにけり

oshimikane
mine no momiji ni
someokishi
kokoro no iro mo
chirihatenikeri
I cannot regret, that
Scarlet leaves from on the peak
Have laid a stain
Upon the hues within my heart
And scattered them all over!

The Provisional Master of the Empress’ Household Office.

490

The Right find no fault with the Left’s poem. The Left wonder whether the use of ‘I cannot regret’ (oshimikane) implies that the poet feels nothing prior to that.

Shunzei’s judgement: The Left’s final section is elegant [yū ni haberu], but although I have heard of many different types of wind, I have no recollection of any familiarity [kikinarete mo oboehaberane] with a ‘fickle wind’ (ukitaru kaze). While I feel the Right’s poem has no particular faults, the initial ‘I cannot regret’ (oshimikane) does not seem to fit will with what follows. The poems are alike and the round must tie.

Winter I: 1

Left (Tie).

晴曇る時雨に色を染ながら隙なく降るは木葉成けり

harekumoru
shigure ni iro o
somenagara
himanaku furu wa
ko no ha narikeri
From the unsettled skies
Drizzle with colour
Stains
The ever-falling
Leaves from the trees.

Kenshō.

481

Right.

時雨つる嶺の叢雲晴のきて風より降るは木葉なりけり

shiguretsuru
mine no murakumo
harenokite
kaze yori furu wa
ko no ha narikeri
Drizzle done,
The peaks the clearing clouds
Reveal;
Now the winds are done, fallen are
The leaves from the trees.

Nobusada.

482

Both teams state they find no particular faults with the other’s poem this round.

Shunzei’s judgement: Both poems are on the topic of ‘falling leaves’, and both ‘The ever-falling leaves from the trees’ (himanaku furu wa ko no ha) and ‘Now the winds are done, fallen are’ (kaze yori furu wa), in conception and diction, are charming [kokoro kotoba tomo no okashiku kikoyu]. They must tie.

Summer II: 28

Left (Win).

ゆふま山松のは風にうちそへて蝉の鳴く音も峰渡るなり

yūma yama
matsu no ha kaze ni
uchisoete
semi no naku ne mo
mine wataru nari
Upon Yūma Mountain
The wind passing o’er the pine needles:
Just so
Do the cicadas’ cries
Pass between the peaks.

Kenshō.

295

Right.

深山邊のふかみどりなる夏木立蝉の聲とてしげからぬかは

miyamabe no
fukamidorinaru
natsu kodachi
semi no koe tote
shigekaranu ka wa
In the mountains’ heart
Of deepest green
Are the trees in summer, yet
The cicadas’ songs
Surpass them in profusion.

Lord Tsune’ie.

296

The Right state that, ‘the expression ha kaze is usually used in reference to birds.’ (Ha here used to mean ‘leaf’, was also the word for ‘wing’.) The Left query, ‘the use of tote,’ which is a particle not usually used in poetry. In addition, they say, ‘“Trees in summer” (natsu kodachi) is should only be used in poems on the topic of “Summer Greenery”.’

Shunzei states, ‘The expression “wind passing o’er the pine needles” (matsu no ha kaze) is not that common, however, it is certainly not the case that ha kaze can only be used in reference to birds. Are not “wind passing o’er the bamboo leaves” (take no ha kaze) or “wind passing o’er the silver grass fronds” (ogi no ha kaze) everyday expressions? However, would it not have been better to say “the wind, blowing ‘gainst the pines: just so” (matsu fuku kaze ni uchisoete)? The Right’s “trees in summer” (natsu kodachi) and “surpass them in profusion” are interesting but, still, “pass between the peaks” (mine wataru nari) and “Yūma Mountain” (yūma yama) are better, I think.’