Tag Archives: namida

Love VII: 19

Left.
逢ふ事は苗代水を引き止めて通しはてぬや小山田の關

au koto wa
nawashiro mizu o
hikitomete
tōshihatenu ya
oyamada no seki
Can a meeting, like
The waters round the rice seedlings
Be stopped
In their endless flow
Past the Oyamada Barrier?

Kenshō
997

Right (Win).
衣手は清見が關にあらねども絶ゆるよもなき涙也けり

koromode wa
kiyomi ga seki ni
aranedomo
tayuru yo mo naki
namida narikeri
My sleeves as
The Barrier at Kiyomi
Are not, yet
Without cease
Are my tears…

Lord Tsune’ie.
998

The Right state: we are unfamiliar with the expression ‘Oyamada Barrier’ (oyamada no seki). The Left state: it sounds as if it is tears that are ceaseless at the Barrier at Kiyomi.

In judgement: the Left’s poem is stylistically tasteful, but with only ‘can a meeting, like the waters round the rice seedlings’ (au koto wa nawashiro mizu) the conception of love is weak is it not? The Right’s poem metaphorically has tears ceaseless at the Barrier at Kiyomi, and with the ta present, I accept the Left’s point to a certain extent, but this type of thing is not unusual in metaphorical poems.  In addition, there is little reason to imagine the waters round the rice-seedlings being blocked. As it has a stronger focus on Love, the Right wins.

Love VI: 22

Left.
独のみ寢屋の板間もあはずして雨も涙も所せきまで

hitori nomi
neya no itama mo
awazushite
ame mo namida mo
tokoroseki made
All alone, and
The boards above my bedchamber
Fail to come together;
Until with raindrops and tears both
I am excessively…

Lord Ari’ie.
943

Right (Win).
深き夜の寢覺に何を思けむ窓打ちてすさむ暁の雨

fukaki yo no
nezame ni nani o
omoikemu
mado uchisusamu
akatsuki no ame
Late within the night,
I start awake; what
Was in my thoughts?
Beating against my window is
The dawntime rain.

Jakuren.
944

The Right state: we cannot grasp the sense of the Left’s use of ‘until’ (made). The Left state: the Right’s poem is certainly not easy to understand on hearing.

In judgement: is not the use of ‘until’ (made) simply because it is appropriate to conclude a poem with that syllable? I can see nothing problematic with the use of ‘beating against my window’ (mado uchisusamu) in the Right’s poem. Thus, I make the Right the winner.

 

Love VI: 19

Left.
下とをる涙に袖も朽ちはてゝ着るかひもなき雨衣かな

shita tōru
namida ni sode mo
kuchihatete
kiru kai mo naki
amagoromo kana
Right through to below
With tears are even my sleeves
Quite rotted;
Putting it on would be pointless
This raincoat of mine!

Kenshō.
937

Right (Win).
戀ゆへに身を知る雨の年を經て心のうちにかき曇るらむ

koi yue ni
mi o shiru ame no
toshi o hete
kokoro no uchi ni
kakikumoruramu
For love
The rain knows how I feel full well
Down through the years
Within my heart
The clouds grow ever thicker…

The Supernumerary Master of the Empress Household Office.
938

The Right state: the Left’s ‘right through to below’ (shita tōruʼ) sounds as if the poet is passing below the palace! The Left state: in this poem it is not at all clear why it is that ‘the rain knows how I feel full well’ (mi o shiru ame).

In judgement: the Left, by using ‘right through to below’, has forgotten that ‘raincoat’ (amagoromo) evokes the sense of a salt-hut and, because there is nothing in the poem to suggest a location by the sea, amagoromo appears to be the clothing of a nun, or something similar. As for the Right’s ‘the rain knows how I feel full well’, it is simply ‘for love’. This seems plain to me. The Right wins.

Love VI: 15

Left.
心あひの風いづかたへ吹かぬらん我には散らす言の葉もなし

kokoro ai no
kaze izukata e
fukanuran
ware ni wa chirasu
koto no ha mo nashi
This pleasant
Breeze: whither
Does it blow?
To me not one scattered
Leaf or word has it delivered.

Kenshō.
929

Right (Win).
色に出し言の葉もみなかれはてゝ涙を散らす風の音哉

iro ni idashi
koto no ha mo mina
karehatete
namida o chirasu
kaze no oto kana
The bright hues of passion
In these leaves and your words
Have all withered away;
Tears scattering with
The sound of the wind…

Lord Takanobu.
930

The Right state: ‘Breeze: whither’ (kaze izukata e) seems lacking. The Left state: the Right’s poem has no faults to indicate.

In judgement: in the Left’s poem, I wonder whether ‘breeze: wither’ really is lacking. ‘This pleasant’ (kokoro no ai) would seem to be an expression deriving from ‘At the head of the road’. I seem to recall it coming after ‘In Kofu in Takefu / Will I be’, but that is not a suitable source. The Right’s poem, as the Gentlemen of the Left have said, appears to have no faults. It should win.

Love VI: 5

Left (Tie).
やすらひに出にしまゝの月の影我涙のみ袖に待てども

yasurai ni
idenishi mama no
tsuki no kage
wa ga namida nomi
sode ni matedomo
Reluctantly
Emerged and left
That moonlight shape;
Though my tears, alone,
Upon my sleeves do wait…

Lord Sada’ie.
909

Right.
をろかにも思やるかな君もゝしひとりや今宵月を見るらん

oroka ni mo
omoiyaru kana
kimi mo moshi
hitori ya koyoi
tsuki o miruran
Heedlessly
Do I wonder
Whether maybe she, too,
Is alone this night
And gazing at the moon…

Nobusada.
910

The Right state: we cannot grasp the sense of the Left’s poem. The Left state: we are unable to understand the reason for the Right’s use of ‘heedlessly’ (oroka ni mo).

In judgement: while both poems do appear to have some conception, the Gentlemen of both Left and Right appear to have stated that they are unable to grasp it. Far be it from me to provide an interpretation in the light of this, so I shall follow the Gentlemen’s remarks and make this round a tie.

Love V: 30

Left (Tie).
故郷を出でしにまさる涙かな嵐の枕夢に別れて

furusato ni
ideshi ni masaru
namida kana
arashi no makura
yume ni wakarete
My home
I left in floods
Of tears;
The wild wind round my pillow
Breaks us apart in dreams…

Lord Sada’ie
899

Right.
東路の夜半の眺めを語らなん都の山にかゝる月影

azumaji no
yowa no nagame o
kataranan
miyako no yama ni
kakaru tsukikage
Upon the eastern roads
All night I turn my gaze –
Tell him that,
O moonlight, sinking
Toward the mountains round the capital!

Nobusada
900

Both Left and Right say they find no faults.

In judgement: the Left starts with ‘My home I left in floods’ (furusato ni ideshi ni masaru) and concludes with ‘the wild wind round my pillow breaks us apart in dreams’ (arashi no makura yume ni wakarete) – this is a form of words the quality of which I am entirely unable to convey with my own clumsy expressions, but the Right’s ‘O moonlight, sinking toward the mountains round the capital’ (miyako no yama ni kakaru tsukikage) is awash with a sense of tears, so it is most unclear which should win or lose. Both truly seem to reflect the conception of this topic ‘Love and Travel’ well. The poems have been so good every round that my brush is drenched with this old man’s tears, and I can find no other way to express it.

 

Love V: 27

Left (Tie).
思ひをく人ある身にはやがてこの旅の道こそ戀路なりけれ

omoi’oku
hito aru mi ni wa
yagate kono
tabi no michi koso
koiji narikere
Leaving behind one
In my thoughts, for me
All these
Roads I tread are but
The paths of love…

Lord Kanemune
893

Right.
變り行く涙の色ぞあはれなる草の枕の日數知られて

kawariyuku
namida no iro zo
awarenaru
kusa no makura no
hikazu shirarete
The shifting
Teardrops’ shades
Touch me deeply;
Pillowed on the grasses
And thinking on the days away…

Ietaka
894

Both Left and Right say together:   we can see no  faults to mention.

In judgement: the Left’s poem is charming in style. The conception of the Right’s  ‘teardrops’ shades’ (namida no iro) shifting is elegant, but  both poems seem to be simply lamenting that one has gone on a journey, and there is little conception of love in them. They are equivalent and the round should tie.

Love V: 25

Left (Win).
枕にも跡にも露の玉散りてひとり起きゐる小夜の中山

makura ni mo
ato ni mo tsuyu no
tama chirite
hitori oki’iru
sayo no naka yama
Upon my pillow and
My foot prints both, dew
Drops have fallen
Awakening alone in
Sayo-no-Nakayama.

A Servant Girl
889

Right.
草枕ひとりあかしの浦風にいとゞ涙ぞ落ちまさりける

kusamakura
hitori akashi no
ura kaze ni
itodo namida zo
ochimasarikeru
Pillowed on the grass,
Alone at dawn in Akashi,
The breeze from the bay
Makes even more tears
Fall.

Lord Tsune’ie.
890

The Right state they have no criticisms of the Left’s poem. The Left merely say that the Right’s poem is ‘old-fashioned’.

Shunzei’s judgement: The Left’s ‘dew drops’ (tsuyu no tama) falling so widely at Sayo-no-Nakayama one can surmise to be deeply expressive of the concept of travel. The Right’s Akashi Bay is a place strongly associated with the sad sound of the wind and the waves, but the final ‘makes even more fall’ (ochimasarikeru) is insufficient. Thus, the Left should win.