Left (Win).
洩らすなよ雲ゐる嶺の初時雨木の葉は下に色變るとも
| morasunayo kumoiru mine no hatsu shigure ko no ha wa shita ni iro kawarutomo |
O, let it not leak out! Though the cloud-capped peaks’ First shower of rain, On the leaves’ underside Has left a change of hue… |
613
Right.
閨のうちは涙の雨に朽ち果てゝしのぶは茂る妻にぞ有ける
| neya no uchi wa namida no ame ni kuchihatete shinobu wa shigeru tsuma ni zo arikeru |
Within my bedchamber A rain of tears Has rotted all, so The weeping ferns secretly grow thick Around the edges… |
The Provisional Master of the Empress’ Household Office.
614
The Gentlemen of the Right state: the Left’s poem has no defects worth criticising. The Gentlemen of the Left state: the initial and final sections of the Right’s poem lack connection with each other. Does the poem have a conception of hiddenness?
Shunzei’s judgement: The conception and configuration of the Left’s ‘cloud-capped peaks’ first shower of rain’ (kumoiru mine no hatsu shigure) seems charming [kokoro sugata okashiku mie]. On that basis, it should win.
Left.
引きかくる閨の衾の隔てにも響きは變る鐘の音かな
| hikikakuru neya no fusuma no hedate ni mo hibiki wa kawaru kane no oto kana |
Drawn up beneath The covers in my bedchamber, and With them between The echo is somehow different When the bells chime… |
587
Right (Win).
雪の夜の思ふばかりも冴えぬこそ閨の衾のしるしなりけれ
| yuki no yo no omou bakari mo saenu koso neya no fusuma no shirushi narikere |
It is a snowy night I know, yet There is no chill: The covers in my bedchamber Have that effect! |
588
The Gentlemen of the Right state: why have the ‘bell’ (kane) here? The Gentlemen of the Left state: the Right’s poem has no faults.
Shunzei’s judgement: the Left’s poem, having the poet buried beneath his bedclothes, which alter the sound of the bell recollects a composition on the ‘bell at the Temple of Bequeathed Love’. Nevertheless, the Gentlemen of the Right have asked, ‘Why have the bell here?’, and they are right to do so. The Right’s poem, on how the feeling of cold on a chill, snowy night vanishes briefly, exactly conveys the ‘bedding’s effect’ (fusuma no shirushi). Thus, it is without fault. I must make the Right the winner.
Left (Win).
冴ゆる夜に鴛鴦の衾を方敷きて袖の氷を拂ひかねつゝ
| sayuru yo ni oshi no fusuma o katashikite sode no kōri o haraikanetsutu |
On a freezing night Beneath my duck-down bedding I lie alone; The ice upon my sleeve I can never brush away… |
577
Right.
木の葉をや鳥の上毛に殘すらん閨の衾も冴ゆる霜夜に
| ko no ha o ya tori no uwage ni nokosuran neya no fusuma mo sayuru shimo yo ni |
Are there any leaves Left by the birds For extra feathers? The bedding in my chamber Is frozen with frost tonight… |
578
Neither Left nor Right have anything in particular to say.
Shunzei’s judgement: I wonder about accepting the Left’s ‘Beneath my duck-down bedding I lie alone’ (oshi no fusuma o katashikite). The strengths and weaknesses are plain, and so there is not much more to say than that. The Left wins.
Left (Tie).
明方に夜はなりぬとや菅原や伏見の田居に鴫ぞ立ちける
| akekata ni yo wa narinu to ya sugawara ya fushimi no tai ni shigi zo tachikeru |
Is it that dawn Has come to break the night, That from the sedge-lined Fields of Fushimi The snipe have started? |
403
Right.
明ぬるか鴫の羽がき閨過ぎて袖に月もる深草の里
| akenuru ka shigi no hanegaki neya sugite sode ni tsuki moru fukakusa no sato |
Has dawn come? The snipe’s wingbeats Cross my bedchamber, Sleeves lit by lonely moonlight In the overgrown depths of Fukakusa… |
404
The Right state, ‘There is no precedent for the addition of “fields” (tai) to “sedge-lined Fushimi” (sugawara ya fushimi). In addition, using ya at the end of both the second and third lines is grating on the ear.’ The Left merely remark, ‘“Fukakusa” is now, perhaps more commonly associated with quail.”
Shunzei’s judgement: ‘In regard to the Right’s poem, although one would really like there to be a precedent, and there are doubtless rice fields in “sedge-lined Fushimi”, I do still feel that “fields” here is a little outre, is it not? While the Left’s “sleeved lit by lonely moonlight” (sode ni tsuki moru) is superlative, I would prefer “quail” to be associated with “Fukakusa”. If snipe call for a place name, it is not Fukakusa, but Yamada, I would think. Both poems are excellent, but with faults, and for this reason the round ties.’