Left
はるのよのあかぬわかれのあかつきはちへのにしきをたつにざりける
| haru no yo no akanu wakare no akatsuki wa chie no nishiki o tatsu ni zarikeru | After a spring night, Unsatisfied, parting at The dawn, Sewn a thousandfold, the brocade Through which I go! |
26
Right
あけぬてふこゑもなみだももろともにうちいづるからにそでぞぬれける
| akenu chō koe mo namida mo morotomo ni uchi’izuru kara ni sode zo nurekeru | ‘Tis dawn, say Birdsongs and tears Both, Bursting out, so My sleeves are soaked! |
27
Round Ten
Left
秋はぎの下葉の露にあらねども消えぬばかりぞ人は恋しき
| akihagi no shitaba no tsuyu ni aranedomo kienu bakari zo hito wa koishiki | Upon the autumn bush clover’s Underleaves a dewdrop I am not, yet Simply will I fade away So much do I love him! |
Taiyu no Suke
19
Right
わすられて年ふる里の浅茅生に誰がためしける萩の錦ぞ
| wasurarete toshi furu sato no asajū ni ta ga tame shikeru hagi no nishiki zo | All forgotten Through the passing years, at my home Among the tangled mugwort, For whose sake is spread The bush clover’s brocade? |
The Daughter of His Excellency, the Head
20
I feel that the poem of the Left is conspicuously poetic, saying ‘Simply will I fade away / So much do I love him!’ while the poem of the Right’s ‘Through the passing years, at my home / Among the tangled mugwort, / For whose sake is spread / The bush clover’s brocade?’ makes me want to ask the bush clover the same question! The pull my heart in more than one direction, so here, too, I feel it’s not possible to decide on a winner or loser.
Showers at one’s lodgings on a journey
Round One
Left
しぐれするもみぢのにしきゆかしきにあけてをたたむふたむらのやま
| shiguresuru momiji no nishiki yukashiki ni akete o tatamu futamura no yama | Under the showers The scarlet leaves’ brocade I long to see, so With the dawn let’s set forth To Mount Futamura! |
Jakunen
51
Right (Win)
みやこにもおもひやすらむくさまくらうちしぐれたるよはのねざめを
| miyako ni mo omoiyasuramu kusamakura uchishiguretaru yowa no nezame o | Even in the capital Might you think of me? On a grassy pillow With a shower Awoken at midnight… |
Suke
52
The Left poem’s ‘With the dawn let’s set forth / To Mount Futamura’ sounds charming, but as we can see from Lord Kanesuke’s poem ‘Futami Bay / Let’s see with the dawn’, it is quite pedestrian. Then there is the expression ‘long to see’—this really isn’t appropriate diction for poetry. I will admit that it appears from time to time in imperial anthologies, and so it is certainly permissible depending upon the style of the poem, though. There’s also the term ‘long to know’—one really shouldn’t use diction in a poetry match which doesn’t express the poet’s true feelings. As for the Right’s poem, it’s also quite pedestrian to say that showers fall on one’s way on a journey, but don’t necessarily fall in the capital, but saying that folk there might think of you waking on your journey, well, why wouldn’t they do that? The conception of the poem is pleasant, and I make it the winner.
Round Eleven
Left
おぼつかないづれうらごの山ならんみなくれなゐにみゆる紅葉ば
| obotsukana izure urago no yama naran mina kurenai ni miyuru momijiba | How strange it is— Where is Urago Mountain, I wonder? When all the same scarlet Seem the autumn leaves… |
Kiyosuke
93
Right (Win)
大ゐ河きしのもみぢのちるをりは浪にたたするにしきとぞみる
| ōigawa kishi no momiji no chiru ori wa nami ni tatasuru nishiki to zo miru | At the River Ōi, When the scarlet leaves upon the bank Come to fall, Cut out by the waves, Does their brocade appear! |
Mikawa
94
When I listen to the Left I wonder what on earth it’s actually about—the end seems redolent of love. The Right doesn’t seem to have any particular faults, so it should win.
Round Six
Left (Win)
山姫はもみぢのにしきおりてけりたちなやつしそ嶺の朝霧
| yamahime wa momiji no nishiki oritekeri tachi na yatsushi so mine no asagiri | The mountain’s princess, Of scarlet leaves brocade Has woven; In your rising don’t despoil it, O, morning mists upon the peak! |
Lord Kinshige
83
Right
しぐれには紅葉の色ぞまさりける又かきくもる空はいとはじ
| shigure ni wa momiji no iro zo masarikeri mata kakikumoru sora wa itowaji | A shower makes The scarlet leaves’ hues Most fine; So, the swiftly clouding Sky I could not dislike. |
Lord Masahira
84
The Right sounds as if the poet has just come to the revelation that, even though a showery sky is charming, can one possibly dislike it, given that it improves the hues of the scarlet leaves. The Left isn’t bad, but it does have two identical sounds ending lines, and this has been called the same-sounding rhyme fault, I believe. With that being said, in the Tentoku Poetry Match, there were some poems with this feature which were criticized, and some which were not, so I wonder if this is not something to particularly worry about. In this poem it doesn’t sound like a defect and, taking this together with the fact that the Right’s poem is poor, the Left should win.
Round Two
Left (Win)
秋霧のたえまにみゆる紅葉ばやたちのこしたる錦なるらん
| akigiri no taema ni miyuru momijiba ya tachinokoshitaru nishiki naruran | The autumn mists have Gaps revealing Scarlet leaves— Remaining offcuts of Brocade, perhaps? |
Lord Tsunemori
75
Right
もみぢちる立田の山はえぞこえぬ錦をふまむ道をしらねば
| momiji chiru tatsuta no yama wa e zo koenu nishiki o fumamu michi o shiraneba | Scattered with scarlet leaves Tatsuta Mountain I cannot cross, for To tread upon a brocade Path I know not how… |
Lord Yorimasa
76
The Right is a poem on fallen leaves and blossom—something about which many people have composed in the recent past and modern times, too. The Left sounds as if it truly depicts things as they are. Its overall construction is lovely, too, so it should win.
Scarlet Leaves
Round One
Left (Win)
山姫やきてふる郷へ帰るらんにしきとみゆる衣手の杜
| yamahime ya kite furusato e kaeruran nishiki to miyuru koromode no mori | Does the mountain princess Wear it, when to her ancient home Returning? As brocade does seem The sacred grove at Koromode… |
Lord Shige’ie
73
Right
色色の木木のにしきを立田川ひとつはたにもおりながすかな
| iroiro no kigi no nishiki o tatsutagawa hitotsu hata ni mo orinagasu kana | Many hued is The trees brocade that The Tatsuta River’s Loom into one Does weave and float along! |
Shun’e
74
The Left’s ‘mountain princess’ is normally used, but where is the ‘ancient estate’? As for the Right, when the trees’ brocade is scattered, only then, indeed, can it be woven and made to flow along by a river. A long time ago there was a poem composed which, indeed, began, ‘The scarlet leaves in such confusion / Drift’ and then continued, ‘Were I to ford across, this brocade / Would be split in two, I’d say…’[1] Furthermore, what are we to make of ‘Tatsuta River’s / Loom into one’? There should be reference to a location which has some connection with looms, but to simply shoehorn in ‘Tatsuta River’s / Loom into one’ smacks of pleasing oneself. There is the earlier poem ‘Without a loom / Are brocade’,[2] too. The way in which this poem is constructed is charming, but these features are difficult to ignore, so thus the Left should win, I think.
[1] The poem is Kokinshū V: 283, with the headnote, ‘Topic unknown’. It is officially anonymous, but is accompanied by an endnote stating ‘It is said by some that this poem was composed by the Nara Emperor.’
[2] Topic unknown. から衣たつたの山のもみぢばははた物もなき錦なりけり karakoromo / Tatsuta no yama no / momijiba wa / hatamono mo naki / nishiki narikeri ‘A Cathay robe— / Tatsuta Mountain’s / Scarlet leaves, / Without a loom / Are brocade.’ Anonymous (GSS VII: 386)
Round Seven
Left (Win)
萩がはな分けゆく程は古郷へかへらぬ人もにしきをぞきる
| hagi ga hana wakeyuku hodo wa furusato e kaeranu hito mo nishiki o zo kiru | When through the bush-clover blooms He forges his way, To his ancient home Never to return—that man, too, Wears a fine brocade! |
Minamoto no Arifusa, Minor Captain in the Inner Palace Guards, Right Division
13
Right
声たてて鳴くむしよりも女郎花いはぬ色こそ身にはしみけれ
| koe tatete naku mushi yori mo ominaeshi iwanu iro koso mi ni wa shimikere | They lift their songs in Plaintive cries, but far more than the insects ‘Tis the maidenflower’s Wordless hue that truly Pierce my soul! |
Junior Assistant Minister of Central Affairs Sadanaga
14
The Left is well-composed, but what is the Right’s ‘wordless hue’? Are we supposed to imagine that the expression means ‘silent yellow’? This is difficult to grasp, isn’t it. Whatever way you look at it, the Left seems to win.
Round Five
Left
あきののは花の色色おほかれど萩のにしきにしく物ぞなき
| aki no no wa hana no iroiro ōkaredo hagi no nishiki ni shiku mono zo naki | In the autumn meadows The blooms have hues Aplenty, yet To the bush-clover’s brocade There’s nothing to compare. |
Lord Fujiwara no Yorisuke, Assistant Master of the Empress Dowager’s Household Office
9
Right (Win)
ほりはてぬ花こそあらめ秋ののに心をさへものこしつるかな
| horihatenu hana koso arame aki no no ni kokoro o sae mo nokoshitsuru kana | As yet undug Flowers, indeed, may there be In the autumn meadows, for Even my heart Does linger there! |
Lord Minamoto no Yorimasa, Former Director of the Bureau of Military Storehouses
10
The Left seems a bit cliched, yet it’s not bad. As for the Right, the image of having dug up all the flowers is unsatisfying, yet it’s not worth drawing attention to when the whole sentiment is so charming, and thus the Right should win.
