First Snow 初雪
都人まづこはみせん山ざとの庭のこけぢにふれるはつ雪
| miyakobito mazu ko wa misen yamazato no niwa no kokeji ni fureru hatsuyuki | To folk from the capital First of all would I show My mountain home’s Mossy garden paths, where The first snow has fallen. |
Nakazane
Tag Archives: niwa
Love VIII: 12
Left (Tie)
思ひかねうち寢る宵もありなまし吹だにすさめ庭の松風
| omoikane uchineru yoi mo arinamashi fuki dani susame niwa no matsukaze |
Unable to bear the pains of love, and Dozing through the night – That happens sometimes; O, just blow gently, Breeze through the garden pines! |
A Servant Girl
1043
Right
思ひかねながむれば又夕日さす軒端の岡の松もうらめし
| omoikane nagamureba mata yūhi sasu nokiba no oka no matsu mo urameshi |
Unable to bear the pains of love, When I gaze out, once more The evening sun shines Past my eaves, where on the hillside Even the pines seem resentful… |
Ietaka
1044
Same as the previous round.
In judgement: here we have ‘O, just blow gently’ (fuki dani susame), and the Right has ‘Past my eaves, where on the hillside’ (nokiba no oka no): these recollect the poems ‘in the depths of sleep I tread to you’ (uchinuru naka ni yukikayou) and ‘the beams strike the hillside through the pine needles’ (sasu ya okabe no matsu no ha); both sound elegant. I make this round a tie.
Love VIII: 5
Left
人待ちし庭の淺茅生茂りあひて心にならす道芝の露
| hito machishi niwa no asajū shigeriaite kokoro ni narasu michishiba no tsuyu |
Awaiting him, The cogon-grass in my garden Has grown lush, indeed; And I have taken to my heart The dew that falls upon my lawn! |
A Servant Girl
1029
Right (Win)
秋風になびく淺茅の色よりもかはるは人の心なりけり
| akikaze ni nabiku asaji no iro yori mo kawaru wa hito no kokoro narikeri |
With the autumn wind Waves the cogon grass, Colours Changing less than her Heart’s passions… |
Ietaka
1030
The Gentlemen of the Right state: the Left’s poem has no faults to mention. The Gentlemen of the Left state: the intial part of the Right’s poem is derived from an old poem, and so does the end!
In judgement: I wonder whether the cogon-grass (asajū), mentioned initially, is as clearly conceived as the ‘lawn’ (michishiba) mentioned at the end? The Right’s poem refers to ‘So full are my thoughts, what am I to do? With the autumn wind’, but reverses the beginning and end of that poem; it is extremely old-fashioned in style, but pleasant as it is plainly intended to be understood as a variant of its model. Thus, the Right wins over the combination of ‘cogon-grass’ and ‘lawn’.
Dairi no kiku awase 13
今はとて車かけてし庭なれば匂ふ草葉も生ひしけりけり
| ima Fa tote kuruma kaketesi niFa nareba nioFu kusaba mo oFi sigerikeri |
Now, it is, they say, that Carriages having traversed The grounds, that Fragrant grassy leaves Grow in great profusion. |
13
Kokin rokujo V: 3331
庭に立つ麻布小衾今宵だに妻よしこせぬ麻ち小衾
| niFa ni tatu asade kobusuma koyoFi dani tuma yosikosenu asati kobusuma |
Standing in the grounds, Hemp, turned meagre bedding, but Even on this night My wife will not draw near My hempen bedding! |
Eikyū hyakushu 343
Sleet
あめのしたふるとはすれどはかなきは庭にたまらぬみぞれなりけり
| ame no shita furu to wa suredo hakanaki wa niwa ni tamaranu mizore narikeri | Beneath the rain, It falls, yet Even briefly Upon the grounds settles not – The sleet. |
Daishin
Eikyū hyakushu 359
Falling Leaves
紅葉ばを夜半の嵐のしく庭は物わすれせで朝きよめすな
| momijiba o yowa no arashi no shiku niwa wa monowasuresede asa kiyomesu na | Scarlet leaves By the midnight storm Are spread around the grounds: O, keep them in your mind, and Clear them not this morning! |
Minamoto no Nakazane
源仲実
Love VI: 17
Left.
いつも聞く物とや人の思らむ來ぬ夕暮れの秋風の聲
| itsumo kiku mono to ya hito no omouramu konu yūgure no akikaze no koe |
Always do I hear The same, is that what He thinks? This evening, when he has not come Whispers the autumn wind. |
A Servant Girl.
933
Right (Win).
心あらば吹かずもあらなん宵宵に人待つ宿の庭の松風
| kokoro araba fukazu mo aranan yoiyoi ni hito matsu yado no niwa no matsukaze |
If you have any pity, Then I would not have you blow Night after night While I wait for him, through my home’s Garden pines, o, wind! |
Nobusada.
934
Both Left and Right state: we can grasp the sense of the opposing poem.
In judgement: I am unable to tell what it is that ‘does not come one evening’ (konu yūgure). ‘Whispers the autumn wind’ (akikaze no koe) is also perhaps rather novel. The Right’s ‘Garden pines, o, wind!’ (niwa no matsukaze) sounds pleasant. It should win.
Eikyū Hyakushu 147
Summer Grasses (夏草)
ふる里のしづけき庭はなつ草の所えがほにしげるなりけり
| furusato no shizukeki niwa ni natsu kusa no tokoroegao ni shigeru narikeri | In the ancient estate’s Quiet garden The summer grasses, So self-satisfied, Have grown thickly. |
Daishin
Winter II: 3
Left (Win).
訪へかしな庭の白雪跡絶えてあはれも深き冬の朝を
| toekashi na niwa no shirayuki ato taete aware mo fukaki fuyu no ashita o |
I would go a’calling; In my garden the white snowfall Has covered all the tracks; How deep is my sorrow, On this winter morning! |
545
Right.
軒のうち雀の聲は馴るれども人こそ知らぬ今朝の白雪
| noki no uchi ni suzume no koe wa naruredomo hito koso shiranu kesa no shirayuki |
From underneath the eaves To the sparrows’ chirps Have I grown accustomed, yet No one noticed This morning’s fall of snow so white… |
545
The Right state that the Left’s initial line makes their poemsound like a reply. In addition, the final line is ‘overly forceful’ [itau tsuyoku]. The Left merely comment that the Right’s use of ‘sparrow’ (suzume) is ‘inappropriate’.
Shunzei’s judgement: Even though the Left’s poem is not a reply, starting with ‘I would go a’calling’ (toekashi na) is common in the reply style [zōtōtei]. In addition, ‘Winter Mornings’ is not a topic which one needs to approach obliquely. There are only the good and bad points of the poetry. ‘From underneath the eaves to the sparrows’ chirps have I grown accustomed’ (noki no uchi ni suzume no koe wa naruru) is not an expression much used about morning snow. However, the final section of the poem appears fine. ‘Sparrows’ chirps’ (suzume no koe) is, perhaps, somewhat colloquial [zoku no chikaku]. Despite the comment by the gentlemen of the Right that the final section of the Left’s poem is ‘overly forceful’, it is a better ‘Winter Morning’ poem.