戸無瀬河岩間に立たむ筏師や浪に濡れても暮を待つらん
| tonasegawa iwama ni tatamu ikadashi ya nami ni nuretemo kure o matsuran |
At the river Tonase Bursting from between the rocks The raftsman If he would be wet with waves Should surely wait for evening? |
Fujiwara no Toshinari
From ‘The Hundred Poem Sequence Composed at the House of the Minister of the Right’ (1172)
Left (Win).
山吹の花のさかりになりぬとや折知りがほに蛙鳴くらん
| yamabuki no hana no sakari ni narinu to ya ori shirigao ni kawazu nakuran |
Golden kerria Blooms their peak Have reached, so Seeming to know the season Do the frogs sing on. |
157
Right.
谷水の岩もる音はうづもれてすだく河づの聲のみぞする
| tanimizu no iwa moru oto wa uzumorete sudaku kawazu no koe nomi zo suru |
Waters in the valley Soak the rocks – the sound Swallowed by Swarming frogs’ Singular songs. |
158
Both teams say that they consider the other’s poem to be ‘trite’ [kyūbutsu] this round.
Shunzei’s judgement: The Left’s poem certainly certainly has a conception [kokoro] which one is well-accustomed to hearing, but I am unable to recall exactly where. In form it is well-constructed [utazama yoroshikuhaberubeshi]. The Right’s initial “Waters in the valley soak the rocks – the sound swallowed” (tanimizu no iwa moru oto wa uzumorete) is excellent [yū], but the latter part is definitely old-fashioned [furite]. Thus, the Left must win.
Left.
山川の氷のくさびうちとけて石にくだくる水の白波
| yamakawa no kōri no kusabi uchitokete ishi ni kudakuru mizu no shiranami |
The mountain stream’s Icy wedges Are melting; Broken on the rocks In white-capped waves of water. |
33
Right (Win).
春風に下ゆく浪の數見えて殘ともなき薄氷かな
| harukaze ni shita yuku nami no kazu miete nokoru tomonaki usukōri kana |
With the breath of spring, Flowing beneath, waves In numbers can be seen; Hardly any remains – just A coating of ice. |
34
Neither team have any comments to make about the other’s poem.
Shunzei remarks that the opening of the Left’s poem seems ‘old-fashioned’ (and hence is cliched). The conclusion is splendid, but would have been improve by the substitution of ‘crags’ (iwa) for ‘rocks’ (ishi). The Right’s poem, in the spirit of clarifying the numbers of waves of water flowing under a thin sheet of ice, ‘seems exceptional’, and so the latter poem is ‘slightly superior.’