Tag Archives: setting sun

Love VI: 7

Left.
入日さす豊旗雲も何ならず月なき戀の闇し晴れねば

irihi sasu
toyohatagumo mo
nani narazu
tsuki naki koi no
yamishi hareneba
The setting sun shines
On fluttering cloudy pennants, but
Comes to nothing;
With no moon, my love
From darkness will never escape…

Kenshō.
913

Right (Win).
いかなれば心も空に浮雲のかゝる戀する身となりにけ

ika nareba
kokoro mo sora ni
ukigumo no
kakaru koisuru
mi no nariniken
For some reason
My heart, as with the skies
Drifting clouds
Does hang; such a lover
Have I become…

Lord Tsune’ie.
914

The Right state: ‘with no moon, my love’ (tsuki naki koi) sounds poor. The Left state: there is nothing remarkable about this.

In judgement: the Left’s ‘fluttering cloudy pennants’ (toyohatagumo) sounds as if it is introducing something significant, but the conclusion‘from darkness will never escape’ (yamishi hareneba), is restricted. Whilethe Right’s poem, indeed, has nothing remarkable about it, it is elegant. It should win.

Love IV: 21

Left (Win).
あらましに心は盡きぬ今夜とて待たばと思ふ夕暮の空

aramashi ni
kokoro wa tsukinu
koyoi tote
mataba to omou
yūgure no sora
Wondering if it will it be
Has been the sole focus of my thoughts;
Tonight, he said –
‘If only you could wait,’ so thinks
The evening sky…

Lord Ari’ie.
821

Right.
心さへかきくらすかなつくづくと思ひ入り日の空を眺めて

kokoro sae
kakikurasu kana
tsukuzuku to
omoi irihi no
sora o nagamete
My very heart
Is sunk in darkness;
On and on,
Go my thoughts with the setting sun,
Gazing at the sky…

Lord Tsune’ie.
822

The Right state: we find no faults. The Left state: saying ‘on and on’ (tsukuzuku) seems somewhat weak.

In judgement: the final line of the Left’s poem sounds elegant. Again, I make the Left the winner.

Summer II: 24

Left.

鳴神は猶村雲にとゞろきて入日に晴るゝ夕立の空

narukami wa
nao murakumo ni
todorokite
irihi ni haruru
yūdachi no sora
Thunder
Among the crowding clouds yet
Sounds, and
The setting sun shines from a clearing
Sky of evening showers.

Kenshō.

287

Right (Win).

これもやと人里遠き片山に夕立すぐる杉の村立

kore mo ya to
hito sato tōki
katayama ni
yūdachi suguru
sugi no muradachi
Could that be it?
Far from human dwellings
In the distant mountains
Passed o’er by evening showers:
A grove of cedar trees…

Nobusada.

288

The Right wonder whether, ‘it is not overly similar to have both “thunder” (naru) and “sound” (todoroku) in a single poem?’ The Left have no comments to make.

Shunzei states, ‘The Left’s poem does seem to have some sort of style about it, but the Right’s “Could that be it?” (kore mo ya) contains many possible meanings, and the phrasing is also pleasant, as is “a grove of cedar trees” (sugi no muradachi), and thus, it must win.’

Summer II: 23

Left.

夕立はなごりも見えず晴にけりいづら小河の音ばかりして

yūdachi wa
nagori mo miezu
harenikeri
izura ogawa no
oto bakarishite
The evening shower
Leaving no trace
Has cleared;
Where is the stream?
Amidst the sound of trickling water…

Lord Kanemune.

285

Right (Win).

初瀬山入日はさせど菅原や伏見の里は夕立の空

hatsuseyama
irihi wa sasedo
sugawara ya
fushimi no sato wa
yūdachi no sora
From Hatsuse Mountain
The setting sun does shine, yet
Above Sugawara and
The estate of Fushimi
Evening showers fill the sky.

The Provisional Master of the Empress’ Household Office.

286

Neither Left nor Right has anything to say this round.

Shunzei simply says, ‘The Right’s “The estate of Fushimi evening showers fill the sky” is particularly fine. The Right must win.’