shimogare ni utsuroinokoru muragiku wa miru asa goto ni mezurashiki kana
Burned by frost, Faded and lingering A cluster of chrysanthemums When I see them every morn Strikes me afresh!
Lord Toshitaka 47
Right (Both Judges – Win)
置くしものなからましかば菊のはな移ふ色をけふみましやは
oku shimo no nakaramashikaba kiku no hana utsurou iro o kyō mimashi ya wa
Fallen frost Were there none, then Chrysanthemum blooms Faded hues I would not see today…
Lord Tamezane 48
Toshiyori states: the first poem has nothing remarkable about it, apart from the undesirable use of ‘clustered chrysanthemums’. The second poem’s sense could be that when the frost has fallen, the chrysanthemum won’t display faded hues, but it is a mistake to link frost fall and being able to see them. However, if we interpret is as meaning it has fallen, so we can then view them for a long time, well, I can understand that, and will make it the winner.
Mototoshi states: this poem has no faults, but it does not appear to be a poem suited to a poetry match—it’s just rather dull. The poem of the Right, too, lacks anything worth pointing out and just says that the poet wants to gaze upon faded hues today—this seems a bit cliched, but I’d say it’s superior.
ueshi sono kokoro mo okanu shiragiku wa adanaru shimo ni utsuroinikeri
I planted them, yet Unconcerned are The white chrysanthemums, For with the faithless frost Have they faded.
Lord Munekuni 43
Right (Both Judges – Win)
菊のはな夜のまに色やかはれると霜を払ひて今朝みつるかな
kiku no hana yo no ma ni iro ya kawareru to shimo o haraite kesa mitsuru kana
The chrysanthemum blooms Within the space of but one night their hue Will change, I thought, so Brushing away the frost Will I gaze on them this morn!
Lord Kanemasa
44
Toshiyori states: the first poem uses ‘unconcerned’, doesn’t it. The second poem’s sequencing is undesirable, yet ‘brushing away the frost’ sounds like that really is the case. It seems superior.
Mototoshi states: one has to ask what on earth a chrysanthemum might be concerned about! As for the Right, ‘Within the space of but one night their hue’ is vague, I think, but ‘brushing away the frost and gazing’ is certainly charming—it is still lodged within my aged heart.
fuyugare ni utsuroi nokoru shiragiku wa uwaba ni okeru shimo ka to zo miru
Sere in winter, Faded and lingering A white chrysanthemum as, Fallen upon its upper leaves, Frost does appear, perhaps?
Lord Morikata 39
Right
露じもの暁置きのあさごとに移ひまさるしらぎくの花
tsuyujimo no akatsuki oki no asa goto ni utsuroi masaru shiragiku no hana
Frosty dewdrops With the dawn fall—arising Every morning Fading fairer become The white chrysanthemum blooms.
Lord Michitsune 40
Toshiyori states: I have the feeling that I have never heard the expression ‘sere in winter’, and I certainly have no recollection of it being in the Collection of a Myriad Leaves. The poem of the Right is smooth and extremely charming; I’m very familiar with the expression ‘dew fallen in the morning when I arise’, and here there seems to be some reason for it, doesn’t there! Still, the first poem is better.
Mototoshi states: the expression ‘faded and lingering’ is difficult to distinguish. In addition, saying ‘Fallen upon [the flower’s] upper leaves, / Frost’ is a severe misjudgment. The poem of the Right has the tautology ‘with the dawn fall’ and then ‘every morning’. Clearly neither of these appears to win or lose, so I make this a tie.
aki hatete shimogarenuredo kiku no hana nokoreru iro wa fukaku miekeri
With the end of autumn Burned by frost they are, yet The chrysanthemum blooms’ Lingering hues Appear all the deeper.
Lady Shinano 33
Right
白ぎくも移ひにけりうき人のこころばかりとなにおもひけむ
shiragiku mo utsuroinikeri ukibito no kokoro bakari to nani omoikemu
This white chrysanthemum, too Has faded; ‘tis simply as My cruel lady’s Heart— I wonder why would I think so?
A Court Lady 34
Toshiyori states: the first poem has ‘With the end of autumn / Burned by frost they are’ and this gives the impression that there is nothing remaining. But saying that autumn has ended, yet one can still see the chrysanthemums, so, in the end, ‘hues appear all the deeper’ means there is a mismatch between the beginning and end of the poem. As for the second poem, it’s a commonplace style of composition to say that you despise someone who has forgotten you, but this is certainly a love poem, and it does not resemble a chrysanthemum one. Nevertheless, there’s nothing particular to point out in this poem and it has some vague parts, so I say this is a tie.
Mototoshi states: the phrase ‘Lingering hues / Appears all the deeper’ doesn’t say what these look like or how they appear. In addition, the poem’s style is not that superlative, and its diction seems halting. With that being said, however, the poem of the Right does not resemble one regretting the chrysanthemums in the slightest. It expresses the feelings of despite between a man and woman who have parted and become distant from each other using the metaphor of the chrysanthemum, and thus the conception of the topic lacks depth, so again the Left has to win.
shirotae no shimo yo ni okite mitsuredomo utsurou kiku wa magawazarikeri
White as mulberry cloth. Frost has fallen tonight I see, and yet The faded chrysanthemums I can clearly tell apart.
Lord Masakane 31
Right (T – Win)
八重菊の花の袂をあかずとや霜のうはぎを猶かさぬらん
yaegiku no hana no tamoto o akazu to ya shimo no uwagi o nao kasanuran
Of eightfold chrysanthemum Bloomed sleeves I cannot get my fill, but Is a frosty jacket Yet laid upon them?
Lord Tadafusa 32
Toshiyori states: the assemble company have stated about the first poem that in the absence of the moon or the stars it would difficult to distinguish chrysanthemums from the frost, and it certainly sounds like this would be the case. In the latter poem, we need to think of who it is that is feeling that they cannot get their fill of bloomed sleeves—the person wearing them should be included, or if the chrysanthemums are, perhaps, the subject, then ‘eightfold chrysanthemum’ is an error. Even so, the style of the poem seems elevated.
Mototoshi states: the poem stating ‘White as mulberry cloth. / Frost has fallen tonight’ is a bit hackneyed, and it then continues ‘The faded chrysanthemums / I can clearly tell apart’—I question whether one would really mistake faded chrysanthemums and frost. As for the Right’s poem, which says ‘Bloomed sleeves / I cannot get my fill’, well, this really is difficult to grasp. I spent quite a bit of time going back and forth agonizing over whether these were a person’s sleeves or those of the chrysanthemum! I feel that the diction in both poems is skillful, but there’s a lack of necessary information, so it’s impossible to decide a winner or loser here.
In the Twelfth Month of Kempō 5 [January 1218], I stayed at a monk’s cell at the Eifukuji on account of a directional taboo. When I returned home the following morning, I left behind a jacket
春まちてかすみの袖にかさねよと霜のころものおきてこそゆけ
haru machite kasumi no sode ni kasaneyo to shimo no koromo no okite koso yuke
Awaiting the springtime, Sleeves of haze, O, layer up! A frosty robe I leave you as I go!
yorozuyo no aki no katami ni nasu mono wa kimi ga yowai o noburu shiragiku
Of ten thousand ages’ Autumns a keepsake I will make: My Lord’s age Extended by a white chrysanthemum!
Lord Akinaka 29
Right
今朝みればさながら霜をいただきて翁さびゆくしら菊の花
kesa mireba sanagara shimo o itadakite okina sabiyuku shiragiku no hana
When this morn I look That’s how it is: with frost Bestowed A lonesome ancient seems This white chrysanthemum bloom!
Lord Mototoshi 30
Toshiyori states: this first poem is strongly characterized by felicitation, and that’s about all the fault I can mention. As for the second poem, ‘a lonesome ancient seems’ is certainly an expression I don’t know. Still, if I think of examples from prior poems, ‘lone ancient’ could be interpreted as deriving from ‘dotaged ancient’, but then the conception seems different here, so this is most likely wrong. I can only give a decision once I am certain.
Mototoshi states: ‘Of ten thousand ages’ / Autumns a keepsake / Will make’ resembles Kanemori’s famous work,[1] which has often been alluded to in composition, I think. This poem is charming. ‘Will make’ is an extremely abbreviated expression, and so the final ‘age / Extended by a white chrysanthemum’ appears to have little connection to it. There is Tomonori’ s ‘Dew-dappled / Let us pluck and wear’[2], and also responses sent on the 9th day of the Ninth Month to the residences of Tadamine and Tsurayuki like ‘Bearing droplets / Age is extended by / Chrysanthemums’, aren’t there. Given that’s the case there would be many such keepsakes of extended age. As for the Right’s ‘That’s how it is: with frost / Bestowed / A lonesome ancient seems, well, it seems that just how I composed a poem about lingering chrysanthemums—have I done something wrong?
masodemote asa oku shimo o harau kana aezu utsurou kiku no oshisa ni
From both my sleeves The morning frost fall I will brush away! Reluctant to face the fading Chrysanthemum’s burden of regret…
Lord Akikuni 27
Right (Both Judges – Win)
露結ぶしも夜の数をかさぬればたへでや菊のうつろひぬらん
tsuyu musubu shimo yo no kazu o kasanureba taede ya kiku no utsuroinuran
Dewdrops bound with Frost—when such nights in number Mount up, Might it be unbearable that the chrysanthemums Do fade away?
Lord Morotoshi 28
Toshiyori states: the first poem is extremely charming. Nevertheless, I must question the use of ‘reluctant to face the fading’ as I feel this is something I have not heard before. I can grasp the sense of diction such as ‘unable to do anything about’ or ‘without taking on autumn hues’, but did the poet mean to use the diction ‘unbearable’, perhaps? Even though this is somewhat archaic phrasing, it is used in composition. This poem’s expressions, though, I feel are somewhat unfamiliar. The conception and diction of the second poem are both extremely charming. However, this poem, too, is vague. What is going on with the initial ‘dewdrops bound’? Does it mean that the dewdrops get turned into frost? If so, then, from what is known of the calendar, this is something which only occurs on a single night, and from the following night there is only frost. It sounds as if the conception of this poem, though, is that night after night dew turns to frost, and this would be a fault. Despite this vagueness, however, its tone is elegant, so it seems superior.
Mototoshi states: the poem of the Left has a poetic configuration, but I strongly feel that it would have been preferable not to use the diction ‘both my sleeves’. It does seem as if this was used in the ancient Collection of a Myriad Leaves, but even given that was the case, in the preface to the Ancient and Modern, I recall it saying, ‘On examining the poems of ancient times, we find they use many archaic expressions. These were there not just to please the ear, but simply for moral instruction’. It appears that there are no instances of this piece of diction being used in poetry matches from the period of the Ancient and Modern, Later Selection and Gleanings, and these were all conducted for entertainment. Even in a poetry match conducted in Engi 12 [912], when the term ‘sleeve’ was used, I get the feeling that it was such a source of amusement that the poem was not recited. While the quality of the Right’s poem is not superb, the tone of ‘Dewdrops bound with / Frost—when such nights in number’ is not bad, so I feel the dew can still remain bound!
