Tag Archives: Spring Dawn

Spring II: 30

Left (Tie).


aki no mo masare
aware kana
tsuki kage kasumu
ariake no sora
The clarity of
Autumn, too, is splendid and
Moving, indeed, I feel in
The hazy moonlight from
The daybreak sky.

Lord Ari’ie.


Right (Tie).


ima wa tote
tanomu no kari mo
oborozukiyo no
akebono no sora
‘Now we must return,’
The field resting geese
Lament, under the
Misty moonlit
Dawning sky.



The Right team once again rate the Left’s poem as ‘satisfying’, while the Left say the Right’s is ‘especially satisfying. ’

Shunzei’s judgement is that ‘the Left’s “hazy moonlight from the daybreak sky” (tsuki kage kasumu ariake no sora) and the Right’s “Misty moonlit dawning sky” (oborozukiyo no akebono no sora) are both splendid. It is difficult, indeed, to decide between them. Another excellent tie.’

Spring II: 29

Left (Tie).


minu yo made
nagame yori
mukashi ni kasumu
haru no akebono
Invisible, in the past
There is nothing to regret,
Long ago upon the hazy
Springtime dawn.

A Servant Girl.


Right (Tie).


onaji nagame ni
kaeru made
kokoro ni nokore
haru no akebono
Were I to think back,
Until this selfsame sight
Should return,
Let it in my heart remain:
This springtime dawn.



Both teams praise the other’s poems this round, saying they are ‘satisifying.’

Shunzei says, ‘Both poems are on ‘spring dawn’, the Left ‘long ago hazed’ (mukashi ni kasumu) and the Right ‘remaining in the heart’ (kokoro ni nokore): both are equally charming in form and sense. This is a good tie.’

Spring II: 28



kasumi ka wa
hana uguisu ni
haru ni komoreru
yado no akebono
Is this haze?
No, in blossom and warbler song
Am I sealed;
Shut in by springtime
Is my home this dawn.

Lord Sada’ie


Right (Win).


kasumi tatsu
sue no matsuyama
honobono to
nami ni hanaruru
yokogumo no sora
The hazes rise
Around the pine-clad peak of Sué;
Departing from the waves,
Narrow clouds trail across the sky.



The Right team have no particular remarks to make about the Left’s poem this round, but the Left state that the Right’s poem is ‘most satisfying.’

Shunzei’s judgement is: ‘The Left’s “Is this haze?” (kasumi ka wa) seems like it wants to be “Is this just haze?” (kasumi nomi ka wa). “In blossom and warbler song am I sealed” (hana uguisu ni tojirarete) and “my home this dawn” (yado no akebono) remind one of “the lofty palace of Shinsei stands behind warblers and blossom” and this is excellent. As for the Right’s poem, this is particularly moving, with its depiction of the scene “departing from the waves, narrow clouds trail across the sky” (nami ni hanaruru yokogumo no sora), recalling “the pine-clad peak of Sué” (sue no matsuyama). The poem does start with “hazes rise” (kasumi tatsu) and having “haze” (kasumi), “wave” (nami) and “cloud” (kumo) means the poem is somewhat overburdened with similar imagery. “Narrow clouds trail across the sky”, though, does make a particularly strong impression, and the Left’s poem is merely satisfying, as has been said. Thus, “my home this dawn” must lose, I think.’