New Year’s Day
冬の夜を旅の空にてあかしてや都に春の今朝は来るらむ
fuyu no yo o tabi no sora nite akashite ya miyako ni haru no kesa wa kururamu | A winter’s night Spent under the skies a’travelling; With breaking dawn To the capital has spring Come this morning, I wonder? |
Kanemasa
東路や今朝たちくれば蟬の声高篠山にいまぞ鳴くなる
azumaji ya
kesa tachikureba
semi no koe
takashino yama ni
ima zo nakunaru |
Upon the Eastern roads
This morning I do set my foot, so
Cicadas’ songs
Around Takashino Mountain
Now are sung! |
Fujiwara no Nakazane
桜にも枝さしかはす桃なれば空さへ今朝はさかやもひせり
sakura ni mo
eda sashikawasu
momo nareba
sora sae kesa wa
saka yamo hiseri |
When even the cherry
Branches exchanges
With the peach
The very skies this morning
Have reproached them for it! |
Minamoto no Shunrai
誰も皆今朝は桜をうちすてて桃をたづねて過ぐすなりけり
tare mo mina
kesa wa sakura o
uchiisutete
momo o tazunete
sugusu narikeri |
Every single one
This morning does cherry
Abandon and
In search of peach
Spend their time! |
Minamoto no Shunrai
Left.
歸りつる今朝こそあらめいかにこは干る間も知らぬ袖の氣色ぞ
kaeritsuru
kesa koso arame
ika ni ko wa
hiru ma mo shiranu
sode no keshiki zo |
Having come home
This morning, I am certain,
Why is it that
A daytime dry moment is a stranger
To my sleeves? |
Lord Kanemune.
809
Right.
をのづから暮れ行く空を待つ程も頼むことゝは夢路成けり
onozukara
kureyuku sora o
matsu hodo mo
tanomu koto to wa
yumeji narikeri |
While I
For darkening skies
Do wait,
The only thing in which I can place my trust
Is the path of dreams. |
Jakuren.
810
The Right state: we find no particular faults to mention. The Left state: we wonder about the appropriateness of placing one’s trust in dreams during the daytime. Was he having a nap?
In judgement: the conception of the Left’s poem is well developed from beginning to end. The Right’s poem has an elegant configuration, but it is unacceptable to have the speaker napping. However, the Left’s ‘Why is it that’ (ika ni ko wa) is unsatisfactory style. I have to say the poems are equal and tie.
'Simply moving and elegant'