駿河なる打津の山べのうつゝにも夢にも人にあはぬなりけり
suruganaru utu no yamabe no ututu ni mo yume ni mo Fito ni aFanu narikeri |
In Suruga By Utsu Mount In reality And in my dreams, my love I meet no more… |
Left.
宇津の山夕越え來れば霙降り袖ほしかねつ哀この旅
utsu no yama yū koekureba mizore furi sode hoshikanetsu aware kono tabi |
Gloomy in the Utsu Mountains, Crossing them at dusk In a fall of sleet; I cannot dry my sleeves, On this lonely journey. |
527
Right.
今日も又交野の御野に霙してかはく間もなき狩衣かな
kyō mo mata katano no mino ni mizore shite kawaku ma mo naki karigoromo kana |
Today once more On the royal hunting grounds at Katano Sleet falls; No time at all to dry My hunter’s garb… |
528
The Right find no faults with the Left’s poem. The Left merely say that the Right’s poem sounds old-fashioned [furumekashi].
Shunzei’s judgement: ‘The Left’s ‘I cannot dry my sleeves, on this lonely journey’ (sode hoshikanetsu aware kono tabi) has a strong sound of loneliness about it [sabite wa kikoehaberu], but there is a lack of anything connected to utsu no yama in this poem. In The Tales of Ise where it says ‘By Utsu Mount in reality‘ (utsu no yamabe no utsutsu ni mo), it does not seem that sleet was falling. If there is no reason for including utsu no yama to express the sense of sleet falling, there are many other places which could have been used to express a lonely journey. As there is no reason for including it, formally [sama de] there is a lack of connection to it. The Right’s katano no mino, too, as in the poem ‘To lend lodging to keep me dry, is there no one‘ is about hail, though hawking does take place there, so the poem does sounds slightly charming [sukoshi okashiku kikoyu]. Both Left and Right use utsu no yama and katano no mino, respectively, unnecessarily – anywhere would have done as well. Both poems are equal for this reason.’
Left (Win).
宇津の山越えし昔の跡古りて蔦の枯れ葉に秋風ぞ吹く
utsu no yama koeshi mukashi no ato furite tsuta no kareba ni akikaze zo fuku |
Utsu Mountain, Crossed in times of old by Ruins, ageing; on The withered ivy leaves The winds of autumn are a’blowing… |
431
Right.
淺茅たつ庭の色だにあるものを軒端の蔦はうち時雨つゝ
asaji tatsu niwa no iro dani aru mono o nokiba no tsuta wa uchishiguretsutsu |
The cogon-grass grows In my garden, but the only hint of colour Is in The ivy by my eaves, Wet with constant showers… |
432
As the previous round.
Shunzei’s judgement: Both Left and Right seem superb in form and diction [sugata kotoba wa yoroshiku miehaberu], but the Right’s ‘cogon-grass grows’ (asaji tatsu) is pretentious [yauyaushiku], and I wonder what to make [ikaga to oboehaberu] of the final ‘wet with constant showers’ (uchishiguretsutsu), but the conception [kokoro] of the Left’s ‘Utsu Mountain’, with its ‘ancient ruins’ brought back to memory by ‘on the withered ivy leaves the winds of autumn a’blowing’, is particularly tasteful [en]. Thus, the Left certainly wins.
Left (Tie).
さぞなげく戀をするがの字津の山うつゝの夢のまたしみえねば
sazo nageku koi o suruga no utsu no yama utsutsu no yume no mata shi mieneba |
Grieving as he In love by Suruga’s Utsu Mountain, When reality is but a dream I never will see more. |
145
Right (Tie).
はまゆふやかさなる山の幾重ともいさしら雲のそこの面影
hamayū ya kasanaru yama no ikue tomo isa shirakumo no soko no omokage |
How many lily leaves of Overlapping mountain Folds I have crossed I know not, yet on the distant clouds’ Surface do I still see her face. |
146
While at Utsu Mountain in Suruga, he thought of someone he had been meeting and sent this to the capital.
するがなるうつの山邊のうつゝにも夢にも人にあはぬなりけり
suruga naru utsu no yamabe no utsutsu ni mo yume ni mo hito ni awanu narikeri |
In Suruga At the Utsu mountains In truth and In my dreams she Is nowhere to be seen… |
Ariwara no Narihira
在原業平