mizu no omo mo mina furu yuki ni uzumorete tachi’i ya nageku ike no niodori
The surface of the water Entirely by the falling snow Is buried— Do they sorrow for their diving, The grebes around the pond?
Cell of the Fragrant Elephant 49
Right (Win)
みよしのに雪ふりぬれば我がやどのならのかれ葉はいとどさびしも
miyoshino ni yuki furinureba wa ga yado no nara no kareba wa itodo sabishi mo
In fair Yoshino Snow has fallen, so At my house The withered oak leaves are All the more alone…
Cell of the Everlasting Truth 50
The poem of the Left’s ‘surface of the water entirely buried by snow’ is something that I have never heard before. ‘Grieving grebes’, too, are something I have yet to encounter. Really, what sort of poem is this? As for the poem of the Right, while ‘all the more alone’ and what precedes it fails to sound elegant, at the current time I feel it’s a little bit superior.
It’s extremely difficult to conceive of the surface of a body of what which hasn’t yet frozen being buried in snow. If snow fell extremely heavily, then, surely, the water would overflow, then freeze, and then get buried, wouldn’t it? I might be going a little too far here, though. As for the Right’s poem, is ‘my house’ in Yoshino? Or is it on an estate elsewhere? If it’s on an estate, is the poet looking at the falling snow and imagining Yoshino? It’s vague. Then again, as the poem doesn’t say explicitly that the oaks are buried by the snow, is it only imagining this? How might something be which has not been seen for sure? The oaks here, too, would be like that, as snow is something which doesn’t distinguish where it falls…
shiranami no tatsuta no kawa ni shikiru kana yama no sakura wa chirinikerashi mo
Whitecaps On Tatsuta River Constant are! Upon it the mountain cherries Have scattered it seems…
Lady Kazusa 13
Right
花ざかりゆきとぞ見ゆるとしをへてよしのの山はふゆはふたたび
hanazakari yuki to zo miyuru toshi o hete yoshino no yama wa fuyu wa futatabi
The profusion of blossom Seems like snow, so Passing through the year To Mount Yoshino Winter comes twice!
Lady Shikibu 14
The poem of the Left’s ‘Whitecaps / On Tatsuta River / Constant are!’ is an expression I have not heard before. I have reviewed a large number of collections, and it has not been previously used. The Right’s poem is one from the Poetry Match held by the Sage of Ungo Temple.[i] Thus, it is difficult to determine a winner or loser.
The Left poem’s central line ‘constant are!’ sounds a bit distant. In addition, looking at the flowing of water is not part of the essential meaning of the topic. If one views the treetops, then one should say something like ‘Hidden in the mountains’ depths / These blossoms – would any wish to see them?’[1] –that’s an appropriate expression to be directed toward such blossoms. This poem is lacking in the sentiments required for a poetry match. The poem of the Right, stating that blossoms resemble snow, is something that has been used frequently and so sounds very well-worn, indeed. The final ‘Winter comes twice!’ also lacks elegance and, in addition, seems insufficient. I would think these should tie?
[1] A poem from a poetry competition held by Her Majesty, the Empress, during the Kanpyō period. 吹風と谷の水としなかりせば深山がくれの花を見ましや fuku kaze to / tani no mizu to shi / nakariseba / miyama gakure no / hana o mimashi ya ‘The gusting wind and / The valley’s waters / Were there none, then / Hidden in the mountains’ depths / These blossoms – would there be any chance to see them?’ Tsurayuki (KKS II: 118)
[i] It is unclear which poetry match Mototoshi is referring to here. The Sage of Ungo Temple (Ungoji no hijiri 雲居寺聖) was a sobriquet given to Senzai瞻西 (?-1127), after he reconstructed the temple in Higashiyama to the east of the capital after a long period of abeyance. There are surviving records of three poetry matches held at the temple in which Senzai took part: the ‘Poetry Match at the Ungo Temple’ (Ungoji uta’awase 雲居寺歌合); the ‘Poetry Match held at the Celebration after Sutra-copying at the Ungo Temple’ (Ungoji kechiengyō goen uta’awase 雲居寺結縁経後宴歌合); and the ‘Later Match Contest held at the Ungo Temple’ (Ungoji goban uta’awase 雲居寺後番歌合). All of these took place in Eikyū 4 (1116), but the first and last are fragmentary and only identifiable from the headnote to poems included in other collections. Ungoji kechiengyō goen uta’awase, however, is extant and was judged by Mototoshi, so we can definitively say that he was present. This match, though, took place in the Eighth Month, and so was devoted to autumn topics; Shikibu is also not listed among the participants, although a number of other court ladies well-known as poets do take part. The other two matches took place in the summer, or later in the autumn, and so it seems unlikely that a spring topic, such as cherry blossom, would have been assigned. The likelihood, therefore, is that either Mototoshi is referring to another match held at the temple in the spring, no record of which has survived, or that he has misremember the occasion on which he encountered Shikibu’s poem. A slight variant of this poem does occur in the anthology Konsen wakashū 今撰和歌集 (‘Anthology of Current Poetry’) (27), a private collection believed to have been put together by Kenshō in 1165-66, but the headnote there references this match, and there appear to be no records of this poem elsewhere in the canon.
kusakare no fushido sabishiku nariyukeba shika koso tsuma mo koishikarurame
Among the withered grasses He lies down, yet into lonely sadness Does he sink, so The stag his mate Seems to long for all the more…
Suketaka 35
Right (Win)
さをしかの声しきるなりみよしののいさかた山に妻やこもれる
saoshika no koe shikiru nari miyoshino no isakatayama ni tsuma ya komoreru
The stag’s Bell rends my heart— In fair Yoshino On Mount Isakata Is his mate secluded.
Tōren 36
I don’t believe I have heard a prior instance of the Right’s ‘Isakata Mountain’, have I? In addition, there doesn’t seem to be any reason for its use here. In general, it’s preferable to compose using terms which are familiar. As for the Left’s poem, it sounds as if the stag only cares for his mate when the grasses are withered, but implying that grass only withers in the Ninth and Tenth Months is at variance with the actual period when it happens, isn’t it? Moreover, it is dubious to compose pivoting around the topic—and doing this has been stated to be undesirable in poetry matches. Indeed, I recall that in the Poetry Match at the Palace in the Fields, when someone composed pivoting on ‘maidenflower’, the judge criticized it, saying, ‘it is mangling the words of our land to compose in this manner.’ Thus, although the poem does have a freshness about it, the Right must win, I think.
