mizu no omo mo mina furu yuki ni uzumorete tachi’i ya nageku ike no niodori
The surface of the water Entirely by the falling snow Is buried— Do they sorrow for their diving, The grebes around the pond?
Cell of the Fragrant Elephant 49
Right (Win)
みよしのに雪ふりぬれば我がやどのならのかれ葉はいとどさびしも
miyoshino ni yuki furinureba wa ga yado no nara no kareba wa itodo sabishi mo
In fair Yoshino Snow has fallen, so At my house The withered oak leaves are All the more alone…
Cell of the Everlasting Truth 50
The poem of the Left’s ‘surface of the water entirely buried by snow’ is something that I have never heard before. ‘Grieving grebes’, too, are something I have yet to encounter. Really, what sort of poem is this? As for the poem of the Right, while ‘all the more alone’ and what precedes it fails to sound elegant, at the current time I feel it’s a little bit superior.
It’s extremely difficult to conceive of the surface of a body of what which hasn’t yet frozen being buried in snow. If snow fell extremely heavily, then, surely, the water would overflow, then freeze, and then get buried, wouldn’t it? I might be going a little too far here, though. As for the Right’s poem, is ‘my house’ in Yoshino? Or is it on an estate elsewhere? If it’s on an estate, is the poet looking at the falling snow and imagining Yoshino? It’s vague. Then again, as the poem doesn’t say explicitly that the oaks are buried by the snow, is it only imagining this? How might something be which has not been seen for sure? The oaks here, too, would be like that, as snow is something which doesn’t distinguish where it falls…
obotsukana izure izuchi no michi naramu shiori mo miezu fureru shirayuki
How strange! Which is which Path, I wonder? Even the laden branches go unseen In the falling snow, so white.
Retired from the World 47
Right
雪ふかみとなりのさともうづもれてけぶりのみこそしるしなりけれ
yuki fukami tonari no sato mo uzumorete keburi nomi koso shirushi narikere
So deep the snow, that The estate next door Is buried; Trails of smoke are the only Sign it’s there!
Senior Assistant Minister Past Lecturer
48
The poem of the Left’s ‘even the laden branches go unseen’ and what follows is both poetic and a familiar usage. As for the Right’s poem, how can ‘the estate next door be buried’ unless it’s the only place that snow is falling and nowhere else? Thus, I feel that the snow falling to conceal the broken branches has more feeling to it.
The Left’s ‘which path’ gives me the impression that there are many of them. This sense of multiplicity is something I can imagine—which is a good thing—and, I think, see me using myself. ‘Laden branches’ are something which occur on peaks deep in the mountains. It might be a bit remiss of me, but I wonder whether I can imagine snow drifting so high on a mountain peak?
As for the Right’s poem, we use ‘next door’ when there’s a fence of some sort between one estate and another, don’t we? As such, saying that the smoke is the sign is rather vague. Even if there’s been a quite extraordinary snowfall, there would be something other to notice as well as the smoke, so this is an error, isn’t it. It would be acceptable to refer to smoke if the estate were further away.
yuki fureba shirushi no sugi mo hana sakite miwa no yamabe mo ikaga tazunemu
When the snow has fallen, The symbolic cedars, too, Bloom with blossom— To Miwa’s mountainside How might I make my way?
Lord Saburō 45
Right (Win)
しらゆきにふるの山みちうづもれてたどるばかりになりもゆくかな
shirayuki ni furu no yamamichi uzumorete tadoru bakari ni nari mo yuku kana
In snow, so white, Furu’s ancient mountain paths Are buried, so Simply I must feel my way As I go along!
Ushigimi 46
The Left’s poem is an entirely transparent adaptation of an earlier work. This poem is:
ふる雪に印の杉もうづもれていづこなるらむ三輪の山本
furu yuki ni shirushi no sugi mo uzumorete izuko naruruamu miwa no yamamoto
In the falling snow, Even the symbolic cedars Are buried Where might be Miwa mountain’s foot?[i]
The Right’s poem has nothing of interest about it, nor does it have any faults to indicate. Thus, there are insufficient grounds for judgement.
The Left’s poem follows the conception of a poem which appeared in the Kaya Palace Poetry Match.[ii] Although this is an earlier work, truly, it’s not that good, and so this poem doesn’t seem that superlative. Why couldn’t one visit if blossom has simply bloomed? The former poem says it would be difficult to get there because it’s buried in snow. The Right’s poem isn’t that good, but it seems better than the Left, so it should win.
[ii] Snow. ふるゆきにすぎのあをばもうづもれてしるしも見えずみわのやまもと furu yuki ni / sugi no aoba mo / uzumorete / shirushi mo miezu / miwa no yamamoto ‘In the falling snow / The green cedar needles / Are buried, so / The symbol goes unseen, / Of Miwa mountain’s foot.’ Lady Settsu (Kaya no in shichiban uta’awase 55). This poetry match, Kaya no in shichiban uta’awase 高陽院七番歌合 (‘Seven Round Poetry Match held at the Kaya Palace’), was sponsored by Fujiwara no Morozane 藤原師実 (1042-1101) and held on the 19th day of the Eighth Month, Kahō 1 [1.10.1094]. The judge, Minamoto no Tsunenobu 源経信 (1016-1097), approved of this poem, saying it was ‘extremely charming’. It was later included in Kin’yōshū (IV: 285), with the headnote, ‘Composed on the conception of snow at the Poetry Match held at the Residence of the Former Uji Chancellor’.
The poem of the Left is entirely lacking in any interest. Isn’t this a sage’s jewelled tree? It really leaves me grief-stricken. The poem of the Right contains two faults in a single work. First, this is not the right time of year to be referring to a ‘verdant mountain’. Second, ‘vanishes from sight’ refers to disappearing in water. In the Collection of a Myriad Leaves ‘vanishing from sight’ is written as ‘hidden in the water’. Thus we have lines such as, ‘swarming frogs hiding in the weeds beneath the waves’. There are no prior poems mentioning ‘mountains vanishing from sight’ in either ancient or modern times.
On the matter of the ‘tree of gems’, I heard a long time ago that this might have appeared in an important source, but as this is something I know little about, even if this is a fault, it’s difficult for me to say anything about it. Well, in any case, it doesn’t sound bad. Would someone who knows all about this compose poorly? The Right’s poem lacks elegance, but it doesn’t sound like it has any other faults. It’s inferior to the Left only in ornamentation.
[i] Some sources identify Mototoshi as the composer of this poem.
[ii] This poem is included in Toshiyori’s personal collection, Sanboku kikashū (670), with the headnote, ‘Composed in place of someone for a poetry match in Nara’,
shiranami no tatsuta no kawa ni shikiru kana yama no sakura wa chirinikerashi mo
Whitecaps On Tatsuta River Constant are! Upon it the mountain cherries Have scattered it seems…
Lady Kazusa 13
Right
花ざかりゆきとぞ見ゆるとしをへてよしのの山はふゆはふたたび
hanazakari yuki to zo miyuru toshi o hete yoshino no yama wa fuyu wa futatabi
The profusion of blossom Seems like snow, so Passing through the year To Mount Yoshino Winter comes twice!
Lady Shikibu 14
The poem of the Left’s ‘Whitecaps / On Tatsuta River / Constant are!’ is an expression I have not heard before. I have reviewed a large number of collections, and it has not been previously used. The Right’s poem is one from the Poetry Match held by the Sage of Ungo Temple.[i] Thus, it is difficult to determine a winner or loser.
The Left poem’s central line ‘constant are!’ sounds a bit distant. In addition, looking at the flowing of water is not part of the essential meaning of the topic. If one views the treetops, then one should say something like ‘Hidden in the mountains’ depths / These blossoms – would any wish to see them?’[1] –that’s an appropriate expression to be directed toward such blossoms. This poem is lacking in the sentiments required for a poetry match. The poem of the Right, stating that blossoms resemble snow, is something that has been used frequently and so sounds very well-worn, indeed. The final ‘Winter comes twice!’ also lacks elegance and, in addition, seems insufficient. I would think these should tie?
[1] A poem from a poetry competition held by Her Majesty, the Empress, during the Kanpyō period. 吹風と谷の水としなかりせば深山がくれの花を見ましや fuku kaze to / tani no mizu to shi / nakariseba / miyama gakure no / hana o mimashi ya ‘The gusting wind and / The valley’s waters / Were there none, then / Hidden in the mountains’ depths / These blossoms – would there be any chance to see them?’ Tsurayuki (KKS II: 118)
[i] It is unclear which poetry match Mototoshi is referring to here. The Sage of Ungo Temple (Ungoji no hijiri 雲居寺聖) was a sobriquet given to Senzai瞻西 (?-1127), after he reconstructed the temple in Higashiyama to the east of the capital after a long period of abeyance. There are surviving records of three poetry matches held at the temple in which Senzai took part: the ‘Poetry Match at the Ungo Temple’ (Ungoji uta’awase 雲居寺歌合); the ‘Poetry Match held at the Celebration after Sutra-copying at the Ungo Temple’ (Ungoji kechiengyō goen uta’awase 雲居寺結縁経後宴歌合); and the ‘Later Match Contest held at the Ungo Temple’ (Ungoji goban uta’awase 雲居寺後番歌合). All of these took place in Eikyū 4 (1116), but the first and last are fragmentary and only identifiable from the headnote to poems included in other collections. Ungoji kechiengyō goen uta’awase, however, is extant and was judged by Mototoshi, so we can definitively say that he was present. This match, though, took place in the Eighth Month, and so was devoted to autumn topics; Shikibu is also not listed among the participants, although a number of other court ladies well-known as poets do take part. The other two matches took place in the summer, or later in the autumn, and so it seems unlikely that a spring topic, such as cherry blossom, would have been assigned. The likelihood, therefore, is that either Mototoshi is referring to another match held at the temple in the spring, no record of which has survived, or that he has misremember the occasion on which he encountered Shikibu’s poem. A slight variant of this poem does occur in the anthology Konsen wakashū 今撰和歌集 (‘Anthology of Current Poetry’) (27), a private collection believed to have been put together by Kenshō in 1165-66, but the headnote there references this match, and there appear to be no records of this poem elsewhere in the canon.
