恋ひつつも居らむとすれど遊布麻山隠れし君を思ひかねつも
kopitutu mo woramu to suredo yupuma yama kakuresi kimi wo omopikanetu mo |
Ever in love I would that you were here, yet Yūma Moutain Has hidden you, and My longing has no effect. |
Left (Win).
ゆふま山松のは風にうちそへて蝉の鳴く音も峰渡るなり
yūma yama matsu no ha kaze ni uchisoete semi no naku ne mo mine wataru nari |
Upon Yūma Mountain The wind passing o’er the pine needles: Just so Do the cicadas’ cries Pass between the peaks. |
295
Right.
深山邊のふかみどりなる夏木立蝉の聲とてしげからぬかは
miyamabe no fukamidorinaru natsu kodachi semi no koe tote shigekaranu ka wa |
In the mountains’ heart Of deepest green Are the trees in summer, yet The cicadas’ songs Surpass them in profusion. |
296
The Right state that, ‘the expression ha kaze is usually used in reference to birds.’ (Ha here used to mean ‘leaf’, was also the word for ‘wing’.) The Left query, ‘the use of tote,’ which is a particle not usually used in poetry. In addition, they say, ‘“Trees in summer” (natsu kodachi) is should only be used in poems on the topic of “Summer Greenery”.’
Shunzei states, ‘The expression “wind passing o’er the pine needles” (matsu no ha kaze) is not that common, however, it is certainly not the case that ha kaze can only be used in reference to birds. Are not “wind passing o’er the bamboo leaves” (take no ha kaze) or “wind passing o’er the silver grass fronds” (ogi no ha kaze) everyday expressions? However, would it not have been better to say “the wind, blowing ‘gainst the pines: just so” (matsu fuku kaze ni uchisoete)? The Right’s “trees in summer” (natsu kodachi) and “surpass them in profusion” are interesting but, still, “pass between the peaks” (mine wataru nari) and “Yūma Mountain” (yūma yama) are better, I think.’