Monthly Archives: August 2025

Sumiyoshi-sha uta'awase kaō ni-nen

Sumiyoshi-sha uta’awase kaō ni-nen 20

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Left (Win)

たまがきにひかりさしそふゆふづくよかみにたむくるかげにやあるらむ

tamagaki ni
hikari sashisouru
yūzukuyo
kami ni tamukuru
kage ni ya aruramu		The jewelled fences,
Trailed with light,
On an early moonlit evening:
Is this to the Deity an offering
Of light, I wonder?

Lord Fujiwara no Kunisuke
Supernumerary Senior Secretary of the Empress Household Office
Exalted Junior Fifth Rank, Lower Grade
39

Right

くもはらふあらしのみがく月にまたひかりをそふるあけのたまがき

kumo harau
arashi no migaku
tsuki ni mata
hikari o souru
ake no tamagaki		Clouds swept away
By the storm wind, polish
The moon, so once more
Light trails across
The vermillion jewelled fences.

Horikawa, from the Residence of the Former Chancellor[1]
40

The Left’s poem is extremely charming with the solicitousness it displays in the sequence ‘On an early moonlit evening: / Is this to the Deity an offering’, but it is truly regrettable that it does not use the full moon or that at the dawn. The Right’s poem focusses on ‘light trailing’ and, as I get the impression that I have heard this a lot recently, the earlier instances have said all there is to say here, so once more the overall style of the Left is superior.

[1] Zen-dajō daijin no ie Horikawa 前太政大臣家堀川

Sumiyoshi-sha uta'awase kaō ni-nen

Sumiyoshi-sha uta’awase kaō ni-nen 19

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Left

さえわたる月のひかりやすみよしのまつのはしのぎふれるしらゆき

saewataru
tsuki no hikari ya
sumiyoshi no
matsu no ha shinogi
fureru shirayuki		So chill
The moon’s light, that
Sumiyoshi’s
Pines’ needles seem weighed down
With fallen snow.

Grand Dharma Master Yūsei[i]
37

Right (Win)

月のすむなにはのうらのけしきにはかみのこころもたえずやあるらむ

tsuki no sumu
naniwa no ura no
keshiki ni wa
kami no kokoro mo
taezu ya aruramu		The moon rising above
The bay of Naniwa—
At the scene
Even the Deity’s heart
Must be unable to endure…

Lord Fujiwara no Norimori
Junior Fifth Rank, Lower Grade
Without Office[ii]
38

The poem of the Left appears pleasant in configuration and sequencing, but it lacks any profundity of thought and simply seems to flow easily. The Right’s poem appears to have some conception, managing to follow ‘Having a sensitive heart: / To such a one would I show / The land of Tsu’[1] and also seems to sound as if it conveys the sense of the old poem about a man finding the bay of Naniwa unbearably fine[2]. With that being said, expanding this to the Deity’s heart as well is charming. Thus, the Right wins.

[1] Sent to someone’s residence, when he was in Tsu province around the beginning of the year. こころあらむ人にみせばやつのくにのなにはわたりのはるのけしきを kokoro aramu / hito ni miseba ya / tsu no kuni no / naniwa watari no / haru no keshiki o ‘I would to a sensitive / Soul show / The land of Tsu / Around Naniwa— / Truly, the scenery of spring!’ Dharma Master Dōin (GSIS I: 43)

[2] Composed as a spring poem, when he presented a hundred-poem sequence. 心なきわが身なれども津の国の難波の春にたへずも有るかな kokoro naki / wagami naredomo / tsu no kuni no / naniwa no haru ni / taezu mo aru kana ‘Insensitive / Is my sorry self, yet / In the land of Tsu / Naniwa in springtime is / Unbearably fine!’ Fujiwara no Suemichi (SZS II: 106/Kyūan hyakushu 413)

[i] Daihōshi Yūsei大法師祐盛

[ii] San’i jūgoige Fujiwara ason Norimori 散位従五位下藤原朝臣憲盛

Sumiyoshi-sha uta'awase kaō ni-nen

Sumiyoshi-sha uta’awase kaō ni-nen 18

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Left (Tie)

てる月もおのがひかりやたむくらむしらゆふかくるすみよしのまつ

teru tsuki mo
ono ga hikari ya
tamukuramu
shirayū kakuru
sumiyoshi no matsu		Does the shining moon
Of his own light
Make an offering?
Sacred white streamers hung
From the pines of Sumiyoshi.

Lord Fujiwara no Koretsuna
Junior Fifth Rank, Lower Grade
Without Office[i]
35

Right

かたそぎのゆきあはぬまよりもる月はしもにしもをやおきかさぬらむ

katasogi no
yukiawanu ma yori
moru tsuki wa
shimo ni shimo o ya
okikasanuramu		The ridge poles
Fail to meet and from the gaps
Drips moonlight—
Is it frost atop of frost
A’falling?

Lord Fujiwara no Suesada
Junior Fifth Rank, Lower Grade
Without Office[ii]
36

The Left appears elegant, but I do not feel that ‘his own’ is particularly appropriate here. The Right’s configuration of ‘Is it frost atop of frost’ seems charming. However, there is also the point that I sincerely feel that there is no good reason in the current composition to shoehorn in ‘The ridge poles / Fail to meet and from the gaps’, and thus these tie again.

[i] San’i jūgoige Fujiwara ason Koretsuna散位従五位下藤原朝臣伊綱

[ii] San’i jūgoige Fujiwara ason Suesada 散位従五位下藤原朝臣季定

Sumiyoshi-sha uta'awase kaō ni-nen

Sumiyoshi-sha uta’awase kaō ni-nen 17

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Left (Tie)

月さゆるつもりのうらのみづがきはふりしくゆきにいろもかはらず

tsuki sayuru
tsumori no ura no
mizukaki wa
furishiku yuki ni
iro wa kawarazu		The moon, so chill, shines
Upon the Bay of Tsumori,
Where the honored sacred grounds,
Spread with fallen snow
Remain unchanged in hue.

Taifu, in service to the Former Ise Virgin[i]
33

Right

あらしふくまつのこずゑにきりはれてかみもこころやすみのえの月

arashi fuku
matsu no kozue ni
kiri harete
kami mo kokoro ya
suminoe no tsuki		The storm wind blows
Across the treetops of the pines,
Clearing the mists away—
I wonder, is the Deity’s heart at
Suminoe beneath the moon?

Lord Fujiwara no Sadanaga
Junior Assistant Minister of Central Affairs
Exalted Fifth Rank, Lower Grade[ii]
34

The Left’s poem appears to be about chill fallen snow spread upon Tsumori Bay, so in saying that the waters bounding the sacred grounds cannot conceal the hue, it appears to be saying that the moon’s light is white, but I wonder if the diction is a bit insufficient to convey this? It seems to me that it simply says that although snow has fallen on the waters bounding the sacred grounds, their hue has not changed—doesn’t it? As for the Right’s poem, I can say that its conception and configuration are pleasant, but it begins with ‘the storm wind blows’ and one cannot say ‘storm wind’ along with ‘beach pines’. One can understand this based on the poem ‘Yes, the mountain wind / Is aptly named “Storm”‘. Still, the poem’s configuration does appear pleasant. Again, I make this a tie.

[i] Zen-saigū no Taifu 前斎宮大輔

[ii] Jūgoige-gyō nakatsukasa no shō Fujiwara ason Sadanaga 従五位下行中務少輔藤原朝臣定長

Sumiyoshi-sha uta'awase kaō ni-nen

Sumiyoshi-sha uta’awase kaō ni-nen 16

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Left (Tie)

すみよしのまつのこずゑにふるゆきのつもりまさるとみゆる月かげ

sumiyoshi no
matsu no kozue ni
furu yuki no
tsumorimasaru to
miyuru tsukikage		Sumiyoshi’s
Pines’ treetops have
Fallen snow upon them,
Piled even higher,
It seems in the moonlight.

Lord Taira no Hiromori
Senior Assistant Minister of Justice
Meagre Junior Fifth Rank, Lower Grade[i]
31

Right

すみよしのはままつがえをこすなみに月のしらゆふかけそへてけり

sumiyoshi no
hamamatsu ga e o
kosu nami ni
tsuki no shirayū
kakesoetekeri		At Sumiyoshi
The pine trees on the beach are
Washed by waves, with
The moon’s sacred streamers
Hung, trailing, upon them.

Grand Dharma Master Chikyō[ii]
32

Both Left and Right lack any particular defects and sound elegant—they tie.

[i] Jūgoige-shu gyōbu taifu Taira ason Hiromori 従五位下守刑部大輔平朝臣広盛

[ii] Daihōshi Chikyō大法師智経

Sumiyoshi-sha uta'awase kaō ni-nen

Sumiyoshi-sha uta’awase kaō ni-nen 15

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Left (Win)

すみよしのまつにとはばやおいがよにこよひばかりの月はみきやと

sumiyoshi no
matsu ni towaba ya
oi ga yo ni
koyoi bakari no
tsuki wa miki ya to		To Sumiyoshi’s
Pines I would ask,
Through all the ancient ages of your lives,
Is tonight, simply,
The finest moon you’ve seen?

Kyō, in service to the Regent’s Household[i]
29

Right

すみよしのうらさえわたる月みればまつのこかげぞくもりなりける

sumiyoshi no
ura saewataru
tsuki mireba
matsu no kokage zo
kumori narikeru		When across Sumiyoshi’s
Bay, so chill crossing
The moon I see,
The shadows from the pines are
The only clouds.

Lord Minamoto no Suehiro
Junior Fifth Rank, Upper Grade
Without Office[ii]
30

While the Left’s poem has no remarkable elements, I must say that the configuration of ‘tonight, simply’ is pleasant. As for the Right’s poem, in addition to it being quite commonplace, when composing about the brightness of the moon, to say that something is the only cloud, if you say that ‘the shadows from the pines are / The only clouds’ it certainly sounds as if that’s what they are at the very least [and thus imply that Sumiyoshi is cloudy, when the topic is the brightness of the moon], so I make the Left the winner.

[i] Sessho no ie no Kyō摂政家卿

[ii] San’i jūgoijō Minamoto ason Suehiro 散位従五位上源朝臣季広

Sumiyoshi-sha uta'awase kaō ni-nen

Sumiyoshi-sha uta’awase kaō-ni nen 14

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Left (Tie)

ゆきもあはぬちぎのかたそぎもる月をしもとやかみのおもひますらむ

yuki mo awanu
chigi no katasogi
moru tsuki o
shimo to ya kami no
omoimasuramu		Fail to entwine do
The chiliad of trees, while from the ridge poles
Drips the moon—
‘Tis frost, perhaps, does the Deity
Deign to wonder?

Lord Taira no Tsunemasa
Supernumerary Director of the Bureau of Horses, Left Division
Governor of Awaji
Exalted Fifth Rank, Lower Grade[i]
27

Right

しろたへのゆきかとみればかぜさえて月ぞしづるるすみよしのまつ

shirotae no
yuki ka to mireba
kaze saete
tsuki zo shizururu
sumiyoshi no matsu		White as mulberry cloth,
I wonder, if ‘tis snow, I see—
In the chill wind
The moon slips from
The pines of Sumiyoshi…

Lord Minamoto no Nakatsuna
Governor of Oki
Junior Fifth Rank, Lower Grade[ii]
28

The configuration of the Left appears elegant, but the expression ‘chiliad of trees’ was said to be impermissible by Lord Mototoshi in his judgement on a poetry competition held in a certain place. The final section, too, seems to require a bit more thought [because it’s insulting to the deity]. As for the Right, the conception of wondering if the moon’s light shining through the trees is snow slipping off them is charming, but I do wonder about the sound of ‘the moon slips’ as a piece of diction. The initial ‘white as mulberry cloth’, too, sounds like it needs further thought [because this is not used to modify ‘snow’], so these should tie.

[i] Shōgoige-gyō sauma gon-kami ken awaji no kami Taira ason Tsunemasa正五位下行左馬権頭兼淡路守平朝臣経正

[ii] Jūgoige-gyō oki no kami Minamoto ason Nakatsuna 従五位下行隠岐守源朝臣仲綱