Left (Win).
年も經ぬ祈る契りは初瀬山尾上の鐘のよその夕暮れ
| toshi mo henu inoru chigiri wa hatsuseyama onoe no kane no yoso no yūgure |
Years have gone by, Praying that our bond should be, but On Mount Hatsuse The bell of Onoe Tolls only distant dusk… |
Right.
朽果つる袖のためしとなりねとや人を浮田の杜のしめ縄
| kuchihatsuru sode no tameshi to narine to ya hito o ukita no mori no shimenawa |
‘All rotted through Your sleeves Should be,’ is that your word? She is heartless as Ukita’s Sacred grove’s boundary cords… |
670
The Gentlemen of the Left and Right both state that they find no faults worth mentioning with the opposing poem.
Shunzei’s judgement: the style of both poems seems pleasant [fūtei wa yoroshiku miehaberu], but the conception contained in the Left’s poem is not fully expressed by its diction. The Right’s rotted sleeves should be ‘like the sacred grove’s boundary cord’ (mori no shimenawa no tameshi to ya), but the poet makes his own sleeves the focus. This reference to ‘sacred grove’s boundary cord’ also sounds somewhat impious. ‘The bell of Onoe’ should win.