Love IV: 29

Left.
寢覺まで猶苦しき行歸り足も休めぬ夢の通ひ路

nezame made
nao kurushiki
yukikaeri
ashi mo yasumenu
yume no kayoiji
Until I awaken
It is ever painful
Going back and forth
My feet not resting once
Upon the path of dreams.

Lord Ari’ie.
837

Right.
忘らるゝ身をば思はで龍田山心にかゝる沖つ白波

wasuraruru
mi o ba omowade
tatsuta yama
kokoro ni kakaru
oki tsu shiranami
Forgotten
I think not on myself, but
On Mount Tatsuta
Dwells my heart
Whipped by whitecaps…

Jakuren.
838

The Gentlemen of the Right: no faults to mention. The Gentlemen of the Left state: the Right’s poem does not have anything to say beyond what is contained in its origin poem.

In judgement: the Left’s poem takes the conception of Komachi’s poem ‘my feet don’t rest, constantly trailing to you, yet’ (ashi mo yasumezu kayoedomo) and skilfully adds ‘Until I awaken it is ever painful’ (nezame made nao kurushiki). The Right’s poem is based upon the poem ‘where, through night’s depths, my Lord’ (yowa ni ya kimi ga), but then says ‘Dwells my heart whipped by whitecaps’ (kokoro ni kakaru oki tsu shiranami), which sounds pleasant, too. They are comparable and should tie.

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