Tag Archives: ama

Sumiyoshi-sha uta’awase kaō ni-nen 13

Round Thirteen

Left

すみよしのあまくだりますまつのうへにそらよりかくる月のしらゆふ

sumiyoshi no
amakudarimasu
matsu no ue ni
sora yori kakuru
tsuki no shirayū
At Sumiyoshi
Did the Deity position heaven’s
Pines—upon them
From the skies are hung
The moon’s sacred streamers.

Kamo no Agatanushi Masahira
Kataoka Junior Assistant Priest
25

Right (Win)

しめのうちにしらゆふかけぬひまぞなき月もたむけのこころありけり

shime no uchi ni
shirayū kakenu
hima zo naki
tsuki mo tamuke no
kokoro arikeri
Within the holy precints
Sacred streamers fail to hang
In not a single spot—
The moon to make an offering
Is of a mind.

Lord Fujiwara no Chikashige
Junior Fifth Rank, Upper Grade,
Without Office
26

While the poem of the Left’s ‘From the skies are hung’ and so forth seems charming, I do wonder about the idea of the ‘Deity positioning Heaven’s / Pines’—it’s vague. The poem of the Right’s conception and configuration of ‘The moon to make an offering’ appears pleasant, and thus it wins.

Kinkai wakashū 222

Dew upon the plains.

久かたの空とぶかりのなみだかもおほあらきののささのうへのつゆ

hisakata no
ama tobu kari no
namida kamo
ōarakino no
sasa no ue no tsuyu
Eternal
Heaven-flying goose
Tears, perhaps?
Upon Ōaraki Plain,
Dew upon the dwarf-bamboo…[1]

[1] An allusive variation on: Topic unknown. なきわたるかりの涙やおちつらむ物思ふやどの萩のうへのつゆ nakiwataru / kari no namida ya / ochitsuran / mono’omou yado no / hagi no ue no tsuyu ‘Calling across / Did the geese let tears / Fall? / My dwelling, lost in thought, / Has dew upon the bush clover.’ Anonymous (KKS IV:221); and: 如是為而也 尚哉将老 三雪零 大荒木野之 小竹尓不有九二 kakushite ya / nao ya oinuramu / miyuki furu / ōarakino no / shino ni aranaku ni  ‘Is this how it is to be? / Have I yet grown old / Though covered with fair snow / On Ōaraki Plain / An arrow-bamboo I am not…’ Anonymous (MYS VII: 1349).

Daikōtaigōgū no suke taira no tsunemori-ason ke uta’awase 31

Round Seven

Left (Tie)

あまつほしありともみえぬ秋のよの月はすずしき光なりけり

ama tsu hoshi
ari tomo mienu
aki no yo no
tsuki wa suzushiki
hikari narikeri
Stars in the heavens
Appear there to be none on
An autumn night when
The moon a cool
Light sheds.

Kojijū
61

Right

さ夜ふくる空にきえゆく浮雲の名残もみえぬ秋のよの月

sayo fukuru
sora ni kieyuku
ukigumo no
nagori mo mienu
aki no yo no tsuki
As brief night wears on
Vanishing from the skies are
The drifting clouds,
Leaving no keepsake for
The moon this autumn night.

Moromitsu
62

The Left, in addition to suffering from the Tree-Bank fault,[1] compounds this by adding a further line so all the first three lines begin with the same sound. This has been noted as a fault in earlier poetry matches. The Right, too, mentions ‘night’ twice and this is a significant fault, but I am unable to grasp the sense of the Left’s poem, so it’s difficult to make a judgement between them.


[1] Ganjubyō 岸樹病 (‘Tree-Bank fault’): this was one of the four poetic faults identified in the poetic treatise Waka sakushiki 倭歌作式 (‘Code of Creation of Japanese Poetry’), attributed to Kisen 喜撰 (fl. 810-824), hence the treatise’s alternative title of Kisenshiki 喜撰式 (‘Kisen’s Selected Codes’). This attribution is widely believed to be spurious, however, and that the work was probably written in the mid-Heian period. Ganjubyō refers to beginning the first and second ‘lines’ of a waka with the same syllable, in this case ‘a’.