Tag Archives: autumn evenings

Autumn III: 30

Left.

龍田姫今はの比の秋風に時雨をいそぐ人の袖かな

tatsuta hime
ima wa no koro no
aki kaze ni
shigure o isogu
hito no sode kana
Princess Tatsuta,
At this time, now,
With the autumn winds
Does hurry along the showers
Upon folks’ sleeves.

A Servant Girl.

479

Right.

あはれなる身のたぐひとも思来し秋も今はの夕暮の空

awarenaru
mi no tagui tomo
omoikoshi
aki mo ima wa no
yūgure no sora
How sad
Am I and so, too,
I’d thought was
Autumn, now ended
With the evening skies.

Nobusada.

480

The Right state that ‘hurry along the showers’ (shigure o isogu) is lacking in technique [jutsu nashi]. The Left merely say that the Right’s poem ‘isn’t bad.’

Shunzei’s judgement: Both poems use ‘now’ (ima wa) in their diction [kotoba], in conjunction with a powerful [sechinaru] conception [kokoro] of regretting autumn’s passing. Nevertheless, the Gentleman of the Left has said the Right’s poem ‘isn’t bad’ and the Gentleman of the Right has said that of the Left ‘lacks technique’. I feel, however, that the initial conception ‘Princess Tatsuta, at this time, now’ (tatsuta hime ima wa) does not refer only to autumn [but could be used for winter, too]. The Right’s ‘Autumn, now ended with the evening skies’ (aki mo ima wa no yūgure no sora) is also somewhat lacking in technique, is it not? Thus, the round lacks a clear winner, or loser.

Autumn III: 29

Left.

有明の名ばかり秋の月影に弱り果てたる蟲の聲かな

ariake no
na bakari aki no
tsukikage ni
yowarihatetaru
mushi no koe kana
Dawn it is in
Name alone; in autumn
The moonlight is
At its faintest
As are the insects’ songs…

Lord Sada’ie.

477

Right (Win).

暮れて行秋の名残も山の端に月と共にや有明の空

kureteyuku
aki no nagori mo
yama no ha ni
tsuki to tomo ni ya
ariake no sora
Turning to dusk,
Is there a memento of autumn, too,
Upon the mountains’ edge
Together with the moon in
The dawning skies?

Jakuren.

478

The Right question the Left’s use of ‘Dawn it is in name alone’ (ariake no na bakari). The Left find no fault with the Right’s poem.

Shunzei’s judgement: I do not feel there is anything particularly wrong with ‘name alone; in autumn’ (na bakari aki no), but the Right’s ‘Together with the moon in the dawning skies’ (tsuki to tomo ni ya ariake no sora) seems most fine [yoroshikuhaberubeshi]. Thus, the Right wins.

Autumn III: 28

Left (Win).

九月の有明の空を見て後ぞ秋のあはれの果ては知りぬる

nagatsuki no
ariake no sora o
mite nochi zo
aware no hate wa
shirinuru
In the Longest Month
At dawn, the skies
I’ve seen, and
That there is nothing more sad
Have I come to know.

Lord Kanemune.

475

Right.

暮れて行秋もそなたぞ恨めしき傾く月の影を見しより

kureteyuku
aki mo sonata zo
urameshiki
katabuku tsuki no
kage o mishi yori
Turning to dusk
Is autumn, too; that direction
I despise, with
The sinking moon’s
Light in my sight!

Ietaka.

476

As the previous round.

Shunzei’s judgement: The Left’s ‘At dawn, the skies I’ve seen’ (ariake no sora o mite nochi zo) and the Right’s ‘The sinking moon’s light in my sight!’ (katabuku tsuki no kage o mishi yori), in terms of configuration, have neither strengths nor faults [sugata shōretsu naki], but ‘that direction’ (sonata zo) sounts overly simplistic [kotozokite kikoe]. Thus, the Left must win.

Autumn III: 27

Left (Tie).

惜しみかね秋暮ぬとは小男鹿の音せで人に告るなりけり

oshimikane
aki kurenu to wa
saoshika no
oto sede hito ni
tuguru
narikeri
Unable to bear
The end of autumn
The stag
Falls silent, and to man
The end relates…

Kenshō.

473

Right.

明日よりや荻の葉あへず霜枯て秋をば夢と驚かすべき

asu yori ya
ogi no ha aezu
shimogarete
aki o ba yume to
odorokasubeki
From tomorrow
The fronds of silver-grass, unbearably,
Will be frost-burned;
That Autumn is but a dream
Will be clear to all.

The Provisional Master of the Empress Household Office.

474
Neither Left nor Right have any criticisms to make this round.

Shunzei’s judgement: Neither team has identified any faults with the other’s poem this round. However, the Left’s ‘The stag falls silent, and to man the end relates’ (oto sede hito ni tsuguru) is unclear, isn’t it? [obotsukanaku ya] The Right’s ‘fronds of silver-grass, unbearably’ (ogi no ha aezu) is also impossible to understand [ekokoroehaberanu]. Thus, the round must tie.

Autumn III: 26

Left (Win).

常よりも今年に秋のくれはどりあやしきまでに惜まるゝ哉

tsune yori mo
kotoshi ni aki no
kure hadori
ayashiki made ni
oshimaruru kana
More that ever
This year autumn’s
Ending –
So much it’s strange –
Fills me with regret.

Lord Suetsune.

471

Right.

かくばかり心にとまる秋の色のいづくの隙を漏りて行くらん

kaku bakari
kokoro ni tomaru
aki no iro no
izuku no hima o
moriteyukuran
So strong
They halt my heart
The hues of autumn
Through some space
Do seem to slip…

Lord Takanobu.

472

The Right have no criticisms to make of the Left’s poem. The Left query, ‘What is the space (hima) in in the Right’s poem. We also wonder whether hues can slip?’

Shunzei’s judgement: The comments made by each team are appropriate. Thus, the Left wins.

Autumn III: 25

Left (Win).

長月の月も在明になりぬれば秋暮れ果つる夕暗の空

nagatsuki no
tsuki mo ariake ni
narinureba
aki kurehatsuru
yūyami no sora
When the Longest Month
Comes close
To daybreak,
Autumn is in twilight
In the darkened evening skies…

Lord Ari’ie.

469

Right.

立ちかへる空なく秋や思ふらん野邊の草葉に露ぞ茂れる

tachikaeru
sora naku aki ya
omouran
nobe no kusaba ni
tsuyu zo shigereru
There will be no return
To these skies, does the Autumn
Feel?
All the plants upon the plain are
Drenched with dew…

Lord Tsune’ie.

470

The Right wonder, ‘Why the Left has “Autumn in twilight” (aki kurehatsuru) at daybreak?’ The Left respond, ‘This is simply to convey the feeling that autumn has reached its end with the evening darkness. In the Right’s poem, “no [return] to these skies” (sora naku) does not fit with the conception [kokoro yukite kikoezu]. We also wonder at the usage of “drenched with dew” (tsuyu shigeru).’

Shunzei’s judgement: The Left’s poem is better.

Autumn II: 12

Left (Win).

秋よたゞ眺め捨ても出なまし此里のみの夕と思はば

aki yo tada
nagamesutetemo
idenamashi
kono sato nomi no
yūbe to omowaba
O, Autumn!
Could I escape you
I would leave
This dwelling, were it alone
Enveloped in evening..

Lord Sada’ie.

383

Right.

眺めつる軒端の萩の音信て松風になる夕暮の空

nagametsuru
nokiba no hagi no
otozurete
matsukaze ni naru
yūgure no sora
Gazing
At the bush clover ‘neath my eaves,
A visitor’s step
Awaiting, carried by the pine-brushed wind,
From the evening skies…

Jakuren.

384

Neither team has any criticisms of the other’s poem.

Shunzei’s judgement: There is no distinction to make between the diction or emotional import of either poem. There is, of course, no reason to expect the wind not to blow through the pine trees, when it brushes the bush clover. I feel that the sentiment of this poem’s ‘pine-brushed wind’ (matsukaze ni naru) resembles that of Round One Hundred and Ninety’s ‘Insects sing from the cogon grasses in my garden’ (mushi no ne ni naru niwa no asajū), but is somewhat inferior. The Left, though, truly captures the feeling.

Autumn II: 11

Left (Tie).

物思はでかゝる露やは袖に置く眺めてけりな秋の夕暮

mono’omoi wa de
kakaru tsuyu ya wa
sode ni oku
nagametekerina
aki no yūgure
Without deep thought
Would such dewdrops
Fall upon my sleeves?
No, my gaze has, indeed, been lost
Upon this autumn evening…

A Servant Girl.

381

Right (Tie).

さてもさはいかにかすべき身の憂さを思果つれば秋の夕暮

sate mo sa wa
ika ni kasubeki
mi no usa o
omoihatsureba
aki no yūgure
And so
How should I escape
From my misery?
I thought t’was done and yet
Am faced with a lonely autumn evening…

Nobusada.

382

Both teams feel the other’s poem is ‘most fine’.

Shunzei’s judgement: Both poems take the topic of ‘Autumn evenings’ and present one type of emotional import before reversing it, making it difficult to judge between them. It would seem arbitrary to assign a winner and loser between such phrases as the Left’s initial section ‘Would such dewdrops fall upon my sleeves?’ (kakaru tsuyu ya wa sode ni oku) and the Right’s final section ‘I thought t’was done and yet am faced with a lonely autumn evening…’ (omoihatsureba aki no yūgure). Thus, the round ties.

Autumn II: 10

Left (Win).

夕さればそゝや下葉も安からで露は袂に荻の上風

yūsareba
soso ya shitaba mo
yasukarade
tsuyu wa tamoto ni
ogi no uwakaze
When the evening comes,
Rustling underleaves
Are restless;
Dewdrops on the sleeves:
Wind o’er the silver-grass.

Lord Ari’ie.

379

Right.

暮行けば野邊も一つに露滿ちて蟲の音になる庭の淺茅生

kureyukeba
nobe mo hitotsu ni
tsuyu michite
mushi no ne ni naru
niwa no asajū
When evening falls
The plains, too, are completely
Dew-drenched;
Insects sing from
The cogon grasses in my garden.

Ietaka.

380

The Right remark that ‘it is not clear what the “underleaves” (shitaba) belong to until the end of the poem’. The Left have a number of criticisms: ‘In the Right’s poem, it sounds as if the “cogon grass” (asaji) becomes “insects”. In addition, the topic of this poem is not “Garden Huts”. Furthermore, the poem lacks any expression conveying the emotional overtones of the topic – particularly with “the plains, too, are completely” (nobe mo hitotsu ni).’

Shunzei’s judgement: It is standard expression to begin a poem with ‘underleaves’, when concluding with ‘silver-grass’ as in the Left’s case. However, ‘rustling’ (sosoya) seems unnecessary in this poem. It seems a rather forced interpretation to think the cogon grass is turning into insects, seeing as this is not something that happens in nature. That this is a poem more suited to the topic of ‘Garden Huts’, though, is an unavoidable fault. So, while I cannot be satisfied with the inclusion of ‘rustling’, the final section of this poem is fine. It wins.

Autumn II: 9

Left.

秋といへばさらでも物の悲しきに夕風立ちぬ高円の宮

aki to ieba
sarademo mono no
kanashiki ni
yūkaze tachinu
takamato no miya
Speaking of the autumn,
Or even if we’re not, true
Sadness is in
The evening breeze
At the palace of Takamato.

Kenshō.

377

Right.

物ごとに秋はあはれを分ねども猶限りなき夕間暮かな

monogoto ni
aki wa aware o
wakanedomo
nao kagirinaki
yūmagure kana
Everything
About the autumn is moving
Without exception, but
Most of all, it is
The early evening.

The Provisional Master of the Empress Household Office.

378

The Right complain that ‘there is no specific linking expression in the poem with the palace at Takamato’; while the Left criticise the Right’s poem for ‘mentioning “everything” at the beginning, but then simply concluding with “early evening”.’

Shunzei’s judgement: while it is true that there is no specific link with ‘the palace at Takamato’ in the Left’s poem, is it not the case that it is a location redolent with sadness? The Right’s poem recalls ‘Everything/Is sadness/In the scarlet leaves’, and thus does not need to say more than this. However, we need to consider the concluding section ‘early evening’ (yūmagure kana). Just like ‘the palace at Takamato’, it lacks connection. The round must tie.