matsurabune akashi no shio ni kogitomeyo koyoi no tsuki wa koko nite o mimu
O, boat from Matsura, Upon the tides of Akashi, Halt your rowing! For tonight, the moon I would gaze upon from there…
Lord Tsunemori 51
Right
月影のさえゆくままにおく霜をおもひもあへず鐘やなるらん
tsukikage no saeyuku mama ni oku shimo o omoi mo aezu kane ya naruran
While the moonlight Is so chill, Is it of the falling frost Quite heedless that The bells are tolling?
Tōren 52
I wonder if the Right’s conception is that of the bells of Fengling? It appears to be said of them that they ‘rang of their own accord when frost fell’, or something like that. Hence, in the Cathay-style poem with the topic ‘the autumn moon seeming to be frost at night’ there is also the line ‘wouldn’t you have it make the Fengling bells ring out together?’ Here, our moonlight is being thought to be frost, and the bells are tolling in response to it. But, as bells are inanimate objects, it does not seem feasible to think that they would toll upon seeing frost. Thus, saying that they would view the moonlight as frost and heedlessly toll, is odd, I have to say. As for the Left, while there is no clear reason for the initial line, the remainder seems reasonable, and so I feel this should win.
Left and Right both have nothing particular to say.
In judgement: One would have no reason to force oneself from a ‘lonely bed’ (awanu toko) would one [shiite okubekarazu ya]? The Right’s ‘that they have rung’ (otozururu sae) sounds insufficient
[orokani kikoyu]. So, the round should tie.
Shunzei’s judgement: the Left, commencing with ‘night has fallen’ (fukenikeri) and continuing with ‘seven layers lie empty’ (nanafu sabishiki) is elegant [yū]. It should win.
The Gentlemen of the Right state: in the Left’s poem the use of ‘have I waited’ (matareshi) gives the impression that the wait has been very long, indeed! In addition, ‘thought to go to sleep, but a further chime’ (neyo to no kane) is unsatisfactory. ‘Sunset bell’ (iriai no oto) and ‘sleep, but a further chime’ (neyo to no kane) – both these expressions have the same meaning. The Gentlemen of the Left state: in the Right’s poem ‘painful’ (kurushiki ni) sounds weak.
Shunzei’s judgement: the statement by the Gentlemen of the Right concerning ‘sunset bell’ and ‘sleep, but a further chime’ is correct. As for the faults of the Right’s poem, using painful or ‘sorrowful’ (wabishi) forcefully certainly does not sound weak. Having said, ‘I hear, in passing, but’ (kikisugusu dani) makes it more painful. The final line sounds charming. Thus, the Right wins.
The Gentlemen of the Left and Right both state that they find no faults worth mentioning with the opposing poem.
Shunzei’s judgement: the style of both poems seems pleasant [fūtei wa yoroshiku miehaberu], but the conception contained in the Left’s poem is not fully expressed by its diction. The Right’s rotted sleeves should be ‘like the sacred grove’s boundary cord’ (mori no shimenawa no tameshi to ya), but the poet makes his own sleeves the focus. This reference to ‘sacred grove’s boundary cord’ also sounds somewhat impious. ‘The bell of Onoe’ should win.
The Gentlemen of the Right state: there is nothing worth mentioning in the Left’s poem. The Gentlemen of the Left state: using ne (‘braying’) and oto (‘sound’) in the same poem is a fault [yamai].
Shunzei’s judgement: Both poems are tasteful in form [utazama wa yū] , but the Right’s does contain a fault, as the Left have stated. Thus, the Left should win.
The Gentlemen of the Right state: why have the ‘bell’ (kane) here? The Gentlemen of the Left state: the Right’s poem has no faults.
Shunzei’s judgement: the Left’s poem, having the poet buried beneath his bedclothes, which alter the sound of the bell recollects a composition on the ‘bell at the Temple of Bequeathed Love’. Nevertheless, the Gentlemen of the Right have asked, ‘Why have the bell here?’, and they are right to do so. The Right’s poem, on how the feeling of cold on a chill, snowy night vanishes briefly, exactly conveys the ‘bedding’s effect’ (fusuma no shirushi). Thus, it is without fault. I must make the Right the winner.
