au koto wa katano no nobe no fujibakama tare kitemiyo to tsuyu no okuran
Our meeting, so hard: In the hillside meadows grow Violet asters— Who should to come to see them Amongst the fallen dew?
Nakafusa, Former Governor of Awaji 33
Right
色もかもよそへてぞみる蘭ねずりの衣馴れしかたみに
iro mo ka mo yosoete zo miru fujibakama nezuri no koromo nareshi katami ni
Both scent and hue Do I imagine seeing Among the violet asters, Of his patterned robe, So familiar, a reminder they are…
Hyōenokami 34
These poems, both Left and Right, appear to be of about the same quality, but while I am familiar with robes patterned with purple gromwell, I do wonder what it is that is patterning the robes here. Is the poet composing on asters imagining them to be gromwell? Even if that’s the case, the conception is not particularly apparent, so I have to say that the Left is better.
yorozuyo no aki no katami ni nasu mono wa kimi ga yowai o noburu shiragiku
Of ten thousand ages’ Autumns a keepsake I will make: My Lord’s age Extended by a white chrysanthemum!
Lord Akinaka 29
Right
今朝みればさながら霜をいただきて翁さびゆくしら菊の花
kesa mireba sanagara shimo o itadakite okina sabiyuku shiragiku no hana
When this morn I look That’s how it is: with frost Bestowed A lonesome ancient seems This white chrysanthemum bloom!
Lord Mototoshi 30
Toshiyori states: this first poem is strongly characterized by felicitation, and that’s about all the fault I can mention. As for the second poem, ‘a lonesome ancient seems’ is certainly an expression I don’t know. Still, if I think of examples from prior poems, ‘lone ancient’ could be interpreted as deriving from ‘dotaged ancient’, but then the conception seems different here, so this is most likely wrong. I can only give a decision once I am certain.
Mototoshi states: ‘Of ten thousand ages’ / Autumns a keepsake / Will make’ resembles Kanemori’s famous work,[1] which has often been alluded to in composition, I think. This poem is charming. ‘Will make’ is an extremely abbreviated expression, and so the final ‘age / Extended by a white chrysanthemum’ appears to have little connection to it. There is Tomonori’ s ‘Dew-dappled / Let us pluck and wear’[2], and also responses sent on the 9th day of the Ninth Month to the residences of Tadamine and Tsurayuki like ‘Bearing droplets / Age is extended by / Chrysanthemums’, aren’t there. Given that’s the case there would be many such keepsakes of extended age. As for the Right’s ‘That’s how it is: with frost / Bestowed / A lonesome ancient seems, well, it seems that just how I composed a poem about lingering chrysanthemums—have I done something wrong?