Tag Archives: kyō

Love IV: 24

Left (Win).
戀詫びて我と眺めし夕暮も馴るれば人の形見がほなる

koiwabite
ware to nagameshi
yūgure mo
narureba hito no
katamigao naru
Suffering with love
I have gazed
Upon the evening dark,
So used to it that it
Has become your keepsake!

Lord Sada’ie.
827

Right.
明ぼののあはればかりは忍ぶれど今日をば出でず春の夕暮

akebono no
aware bakari wa
shinoburedo
kyō oba idezu
haru no yūgure
The dawn’s
Sadness, I do just
Bear, but, oh,
Today, it will never come –
The evening in springtime!

Nobusada.
828

The Right state: when one understands the purport of the Left’s poem, it comes as a revelation. The Left state: in the Right’s poem we are unable to grasp the sense of ‘it will never come’ (idezu). In addition, the conception of Love seems lacking.

In judgement: both poems ‘evenings’ are support by little diction, yet the conception of Love is profound, indeed, such that my own shallow knowledge finds it difficult to grasp. However, the Right’s ‘Today, it will never come’ (kyō oba idezu) certainly does seem difficult to comprehend. I would have to say that the Left’s ‘So used to it that it’ (narureba hito no) is marginally superior.

Love IV: 19

Left (Win).
つれなくて今日も過ぬと思には暮るゝ空さへ恨めしき哉

tsurenakute
kyō mo suginu to
omou ni wa
kururu sora sae
urameshiki kana
Heartlessly
Has she spent today,
I think, and
Evening the darkening sky
Do I despise!

Lord Suetsune.
817

Right.
あやにくに物ぞ悲しき待ちし日は曇る空さへ嬉しかりしを

ayaniku ni
mono zo kanashiki
machishi hi wa
kumoru sora sae
ureshikarishi o
Unexpectedly,
All is sadness;
All day I waited, and
The very clouding of the sky
Was a joy, but…

Lord Takanobu.
818

The Right: we find no faults to mention. The Left state: ‘The very clouding’ (kumoru sae koso) does not sound like a reference to the evening.

In judgement: in the Right’s poem, as it begins with  ‘unexpectedly’ (ayaniku ni), it then becomes unnecessary to mention clouding. The Left’s poem is pleasant. It should win.