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Daikōtaigōgū daijin kiyosuke-ason ke uta’awase 21

Round Twenty-One

Left (Win)

小倉山木木のもみぢのくれなゐはみねの嵐のおろすなりけり

ogurayama
kigi no momiji no
kurenai wa
mine no arashi no
orosu narikeri
On gloomy Mount Ogura
The leaves upon the trees,
So scarlet,
By the storm wind from the peak
Are tossed down.

Lord Kiyosuke
41

Right

ふかくあさきもみぢばながるあすか河ふちせは色にあらはれにけり

fukaku asaki
momijiba nagaru
asukagawa
fuchise wa iro ni
arawarenikeri
Across both depths and shallows
Flow the scarlet leaves
On the Asuka river,
Among the rapids and the pools
Have they appeared.

Shun’e
42

Neither of these is bad. The Right violates the five syllable pattern; the Left has no faults.

Daikōtaigōgū daijin kiyosuke-ason ke uta’awase 08

Round Eight

Left (Tie)

うき世をば又なににかはなぐさめん花にさきだついのちともがな

ukiyo oba
mata nani ni ka wa
nagusamen
hana ni sakidatsu
inochi to mogana
In this cruel world
Is there yet anything else
To console me?
Before the blossoms’ departure
I would my life do the same…

Court Lady Taifu
15

Right

桜さく春の山風みねこせば雪ふりつもる谷のほそみち

sakura saku
haru no yamakaze
mine koseba
yuki furitsumoru
tani no hosomichi
When in cherry-blooming
Spring, the mountain breezes
Cross the peaks
Snow falls and piles high
Upon the narrow valley paths.

Moromitsu
16

Both poems are smooth, and on that basis, I would say that the Right is superior, but it has an archaic element, while the Left lacks anything unusual about it, so this is a tie of quality.

Entō ōn’uta’awase 14

Round Fourteen

Left (Win)

ちりちらず花より外の色ぞなきかさなる山の嶺の春風

chiri chirazu
hana yori hoka no
iro zo naki
kasanaru yama no
mine no harukaze
Scattered, or not,
Other than the blossoms’
Hues are there none
Layered upon the mountain
Peaks by the breeze in springtime.[1]

Shō
27

Right

かづらきやたかまの山はうづもれて空に棚引く春のしら雲

kazuragi ya
takama no yama wa
uzumorete
sora ni tanabiku
haru no shirakumo
In Kazuragi
Takama Mountain
Is buried by
Trailing across the skies
Clouds of white in springtime.

Nagatsuna
28

The Left’s poem appears fine. The Right’s poem, having ‘Takama Mountain is buried’ is both pretentious and does not link to anything. The Left must win.


[1] An allusive variation on: On a folding screen for the Kamo Virgin, for the place showing people going along a mountain path. ちりちらずきかまほしきをふるさとの花見て帰る人もあはなん chiri chirazu / kikamahoshiki o / furusato no / hana mitekaeru / hito mo awanan ‘Are they scattered, or not, is / What I would ask, but / The ancient estate’s / Blossom having seen and returned— / Those folk I would have you meet.’ Ise (SIS I: 49)

Entō ōn’uta’awase 11

Round Eleven

Left

しら雲の朝たつ山のからにしき枝に一むら春風ぞ吹く

shirakumo no
asa tatsu yama no
karanishiki
eda ni hito mura
harukaze zo fuku
Clouds of white
Arising with the morning on the mountain:
Cathay brocade
In a single bunch upon the branch
Blown by the breeze of spring! [1]

Supernumerary Major Counsellor Moto’ie
21

Right (Win)

かづらきや嶺の桜のさきしより心の空にかかるしら雲

kazuragi ya
mine no sakura no
sakishi yori
kokoro no sora ni
kakaru shirakumo
Upon Kazuragi
Peak, the cherries
Have bloomed and ever since
The heavens of my heart are
Draped with clouds of white.

Lord Nobunari
22

The Left’s poem has ‘Arising with the morning on the mountain: Cathay brocade in a single bunch upon the branch’ and, while it mentions spring breezes in its final section and does not fail to reflect the surface appearance of its source poem, conveys a feeling of scarlet leaves without mentioning blossom or cherry, which I have to say is something of a fault. The Right’s poem does not seem poor and lacks any faults worth mentioning, so it should win.


[1] An allusive variation on SIS IV: 220.

Entō ōn’uta’awase 10

Round Ten

Left (Win)

数ならぬ深山がくれを尋ねてぞ心の末の花も見るべき

kazu naranu
miyamagakure o
tazunete zo
kokoro no sue no
hana mo mirubeki
Not for many, but
Hidden deep within the mountains,
I go seeking for
My heart’s final desire:
Catching sight of a blossom.

The Former Minister of the Centre
19

Right

まがひこし雲をばよそに吹きなして峰の桜ににほふ春風

magaikoshi
kumo o ba yoso ni
fukinashite
mine no sakura ni
niou harukaze
I had mistaken
The clouds far away
A’blowing, for
Cherries on the peaks
Scenting the breeze of spring.

Kozaishō
20

Both Left and Right sound elegant, yet still the hue of ‘my heart’s final desire: blossom’ is something I can visualise—thus, it wins.

KYS I: 57

Composed on blossom fallen on the water.

はなさそふあらしやみねをわたるらんさくらなみよるたにがはのみづ

Fana sasoFu
arasi ya mine wo
wataruran
sakuranami yoru
tanigaFa no midu
Enticing the blossom
Is it the storm wind upon the peak
That passes o’er
The cherry waves breaking
In the waters of a valley stream?

Lord Minamoto no Masakane

A kuzushiji version of the poem's text.
Created with Soan.