Left (Win)
さらぬだに身にしむ夜はの笛の音を憂き人ゆへに聞き明かしつる
saranu dani
mi ni shimu yowa no
fue no ne o
ukibito yue ni
kiki akashitsuru |
Even were I not so in love,
On a night that chills the soul
The strains of a flute
For that cruel one
Drift to me ‘til the dawn… |
Lord Kanemune
1085
Right
我ゆへに思はぬ夜はの笛の音も藻に棲む虫と袖は濡れけり
ware yue ni
omowanu yowa no
fue no ne mo
mo ni sumu mushi to
sode wa nurekeri |
For my sake
I did not think this night
The flute’s strains –
A shrimp among the seaweed –
Soak the sleeves. |
Jakuren
1086
The Right state: the Left’s poem is overly lacking in thought. The Left state: no faults.
In judgement: the Left has ‘for that cruel one’ (ukibito yue ni) – does this mean perhaps that one is unable to sleep as a result of someone’s cruelty? The reference to ‘a shrimp among the seaweed’ (mo ni sumu mushi) in the Right’s latter section feels overly abrupt and sounds lacking in connection to anything else in the poem. ‘That cruel one’ sounds somewhat insufficient, but it certainly has no faults. Thus, the Left wins.
Composed on the conception of Love, when he held a poetry contest at his residence while he was a Middle Captain.
我が恋は海女の刈る藻に乱れつつかわく時なき浪の下草
wa ga koFi Fa
ama no karu mo ni
midaretutu
kaFaku toki naki
nami no sitagusa |
My love is
As seaweed reaped by fisher-girls,
Ever tangled, and
Not a moment dry
Have the weeds beneath the waves… |
Supernumerary Middle Councillor [Fujiwara no] Toshitada
権中納言俊忠
朝戸出の君が足結を濡らす露原早く起き出でつつ我れも裳裾濡らさな
asa tode no
kimi ga ayupi wo
nurasu tuyu para
payaku oki
idetutu ware mo
mosuso nurasana |
In the morning, opening the door
Bound up, your belt
Will be drenched by the dewy fields;
Swiftly rising
I, too, shall venture out and
Soak my skirt-hem… |
Kakinomoto no Hitomaro Collection
柿本人麻呂歌集
藻刈り舟沖漕ぎ来らし妹が島形見の浦に鶴翔る見ゆ
mo kari pune
oki kogi kurasi
imogasima
katami no ura ni
tadu kakeru miyu |
Seeking seaweed, the boats
Have rowed into the offing, it seems;
Between Imogashima and
Katami shore
I can see the cranes a’flying. |
難波江の藻に埋るる玉柏あらはれてだに人を恋はや
naniFae no
mo ni udumoruru
tamakasiFa
araFarete dani
Fito wo koFi Fa ya |
By the bay of Naniwa
Buried in the weeds
A gemmed oak
Appears – just so
Does my love for her? |
Minamoto no Toshiyori
源俊頼
松浦川川の瀬光り鮎釣ると立たせる妹が裳の裾濡れぬ
maturagapa
kap no se pikari
ayu turu to
tataseru imo ga
mo no suso nurenu |
“At Matsura River
From the rushing waters shining
Sweetfish I will catch,”
So says my darling, standing there
Her dress-hem drenched! |
Ōtomo no Tabito
ますらをが藻ふしつか鮒ふし漬けしかひやが下も氷りしにけり
masurao ga
mofushitsukabuna
fushizukeshi
kaiya ga shita mo
kōrishinikeri |
Where brawny man
Finger carp
Did trap,
Even beneath the keeping-hut
Is thick with ice. |
Fujiwara no Kinzane
藤原公実
'Simply moving and elegant'