Left (Win)
住みなれし人はこずゑに絶えはてて琴の音にのみ通ふ松風
suminareshi
hito wa kozue ni
taehatete
koto no ne ni nomi
kayou matsukaze |
Accustomed to his being here,
Now, he comes not and from the treetops
All that endures
Are my zither’s strains,
Blending with the pines. |
Lord Ari’ie
1103
Right
聞かじただつれなき人の琴の音にいとはず通ふ松の風をば
kikaji tada
tsurenaki hito no
koto no ne ni
itowazu kayou
matsu no kaze o ba |
I will listen no more!
To that cruel man’s
Zither strains
Heedlessly blending
With the wind from off the pines… |
Nobusada
1104
The Right state: it sounds as if the man is enduring on the treetops. The Left state: ‘I will listen no more!’ (kikaji tada) is extremely coarse.
In judgement: while it may sound as if the man is enduring on the treetops in the Left’s poem, this is no more than a standard use of metaphorical expression, and the configuration of ‘accustomed to his being here, now, he comes not and from the treetops’ (suminareshi hito wa kozue ni) sounds fine, with the latter part of the poem also being elegant. The initial line of the Right’s poem has a conception of closing up the ears to block one’s auditory sense, which seems excessive. Clearly, the Left’s ‘my zither’s strains’ (koto no ne ni nomi) must win.
Left (Tie)
君ゆへもかなしき琴の音は立てつ子を思ふ鶴に通ふのみかは
kimi yue mo
kanashiki koto no
ne wa tatetsu
ko o omou tsuru ni
kayou nomi ka wa |
For you
In sadness has my zither
Put forth strains, so
Can a crane calling for her chick
Be the only one to cry? |
A Servant Girl
1101
Right
よそになる人だにつらき琴の音に子を思ふ鶴も心知られて
yoso ni naru
hito dani tsuraki
koto no ne ni
ko o omou tsuru mo
kokoro shirarete |
Strangers to me –
Even they the pain
Within my zither’s strains,
As a crane calling for her chick,
Feel in their hearts! |
Ietaka
1102
Left and Right together: no faults to mention.
In judgement: both Left and Right mention ‘a crane calling for her chick’ (ko o omou tsuru). This would appear to be after the conception of the pentachord in Bai’s Works: ‘The third and fourth strings are chill, and at night a crane, loving her chick, calls from her cage.’ This is not the usual zither with seven strings, but it is certainly also a kind of zither. In the topic ‘On Zithers’ there is certainly no issue with alluding to Japanese zithers or Chinese ones, is there? In any case, neither poem seems greatly inferior or superior, so the round ties.
Left (Win)
あはれとて聞き知る人はなけれども恋しき琴の音こそ絶えせね
aware tote
kikishiru hito wa
nakeredomo
koishiki koto no
ne koso taesene |
To be moved
By hearing is there
No one, yet
My beloved zither’s
Strains sound on and on… |
Kenshō
1099
Right
なをざりにはかなくすさむ琴の音もまつには通ふ物とこそ聞け
naozari ni
hakanaku susamu
koto no ne mo
matsu ni wa kayou
mono to koso kike |
Carelessly and
Wildly plucked
My zither’s strains
Blend with the pines
I had heard… |
Lord Takanobu
1100
The Right state: the Left’s poem has no faults to mention. The Left state: the Right’s poem is not bad.
In judgement: both Gentlemen’s ‘zithers’ (koto) appear to be equally elegant, and the Right has a fine final section. The Left seems pleasant in both the initial and latter sections. So, the Left wins.
Left
恋妻はあらぬしらべしらべの琴の緒かあふことかたき音のみ絶えせぬ
koizuma wa
aranu shirabe no
koto no o ka
au koto kataki
ne nomi taesenu |
My beloved wife:
Is it that untuned are
Our zithers’ strings?
So there is no harmony, and
Only my sobs are ceaseless… |
Lord Suetsune
1095
Right (Win)
松風に通ふと聞きし琴の音も物思ふ時は身にぞしみける
matsukaze ni
kayou to kikishi
koto no ne mo
mono’omou toki wa
mi ni zo shimikeru |
The wind in the pines
Resembles, I had heard,
A zither’s strains that, too,
When sunk in gloomy thought
Dye one so deeply… |
Jakuren
1096
The Right state: saying ‘our zithers’ strings?’ (koto no o ka) is unsatisfactory. The Left state: if one is not depressed, would one not be deeply affected?
In judgement: the Left certainly sounds as if something is out of tune! The Right’s poem says that on hearing the wind pass through the pine trees, one would be affected. It sounds by no means distant from the topic. Thus, the Right wins.
Left (Tie)
うらやましわがりこちくと笛の音を頼むる中の人は聞くらん
urayamashi
wagari kochiku to
fue no ne o
tanomuru naka no
hito wa kikuran |
O, how I envious I am!
To my house comes, a bamboo
Flute’s strains – from
A trustworthy, loving
Man, it sounds… |
Lord Suetsune
1087
Right
より竹の君によりけんことぞ憂き一夜のふしに音のみ泣かれて
yoritake no
kimi ni yoriken
koto zo uki
hitoyo no fushi ni
ne nomi nakarete |
Bamboo flotsam –
That you should draw near
Is cruel, indeed, for
A single night together, brings
Only the sound of weeping… |
Lord Tsune’ie
1088
‘Flotsam of bamboo’ (yoritake) and ‘comes, a bamboo’ (kochiku) are equally unsatisfying.
In judgement: ‘Flotsam of bamboo’ and ‘comes, a bamboo’ are of equal quality.
Left (Win)
さらぬだに身にしむ夜はの笛の音を憂き人ゆへに聞き明かしつる
saranu dani
mi ni shimu yowa no
fue no ne o
ukibito yue ni
kiki akashitsuru |
Even were I not so in love,
On a night that chills the soul
The strains of a flute
For that cruel one
Drift to me ‘til the dawn… |
Lord Kanemune
1085
Right
我ゆへに思はぬ夜はの笛の音も藻に棲む虫と袖は濡れけり
ware yue ni
omowanu yowa no
fue no ne mo
mo ni sumu mushi to
sode wa nurekeri |
For my sake
I did not think this night
The flute’s strains –
A shrimp among the seaweed –
Soak the sleeves. |
Jakuren
1086
The Right state: the Left’s poem is overly lacking in thought. The Left state: no faults.
In judgement: the Left has ‘for that cruel one’ (ukibito yue ni) – does this mean perhaps that one is unable to sleep as a result of someone’s cruelty? The reference to ‘a shrimp among the seaweed’ (mo ni sumu mushi) in the Right’s latter section feels overly abrupt and sounds lacking in connection to anything else in the poem. ‘That cruel one’ sounds somewhat insufficient, but it certainly has no faults. Thus, the Left wins.
Left (Tie)
よそにのみ隣の笛を聞き来しに我身の上に音こそ絶えせね
yoso ni nomi
tonari no fue o
kikikoshi ni
wa ga mi no ue ni
ne koso taesene |
Simply a stranger to me is
The flute from next door
Drifting to my ear, but
Upon me fall
Nothing but endless cries. |
Lord Ari’ie
1083
Right
夜もすがらよそに聞きつる笛の音の片敷く袖に移りぬる哉
yomosugara
yoso ni kikitsuru
fue no ne no
katashiku sode ni
utsurinuru kana |
All through the night
I heard a strange
Flute’s strains;
On a single spread sleeve
Have they come to rest… |
Nobusada
1084
The Right state: the Left’s poem has no faults to mention. The Left state: we wonder about the appropriateness of the sound of a flute coming to rest on sleeves?
In judgement: both poems are about the ‘sounds of a flute’, with the Left having them ‘upon me fall’ (wa ga mi no ue ni) endlessly, and the Right resting ‘on a single spread sleeve’ (katashiku sode ni). Neither has a conception of love which is greater or lesser than the other. I must make this round a tie.
'Simply moving and elegant'