荒雄らは妻子の業をば思はずろ年の八年を待てど来まさず
| arawora wa meko ga nari woba omopazuro tosi no yatose wo matedo komasazu |
Arao Of his wife’s life Thought not; On down the years She waits, but he returns not! |
Tag Archives: years
Love V: 5
Left (Tie).
言はぬ間は思ふも心九十九髪さは僞りの夢や見てまし
| iwanu ma wa omou mo kokoro tukumogami sa wa itsuwari no yume ya mitemashi |
While he’s said not a word, If love in his heart Arrived for my white hair, Then a false dream Would I see in truth? |
Lord Kanemune.
849
Right.
戀初めし心の色に積む年は我黒髪に現れにけり
| koi someshi kokoro no iro ni tsumu toshi wa wa ga kurogami ni arawarenikeri |
Since I first awoke to love The hues of passion in my heart by The drifting years Upon my raven tresses Are made clear. |
Nobusada.
850
The Right state: is this a reference to the recent poem ‘seeing a dream with white hair’ (yume o miru to mo tsukumogami)? The Left state: ‘drifting years’ (tsumu toshi) is grating on the ear.
In judgement: both poems refer to hair, and the Gentlemen of the Right have asked whether the Left are referring to a ‘recent poem’, and I wonder when this poem might have been composed? It is impossible to entirely avoid referring to poems which are not included in the anthologies. Needless to say, though, it is normal for one’s poems not to resemble others to a great extent. In addition, I do not feel that ‘drifting years’ is that grating on the ear. However, simply saying ‘Upon my raven tresses are made clear’ (wa ga kurogami ni arawarenikeri) does not convey a strong sense of gray hair, I think. Finally, the configuration of the Left’s ‘then a false dream’ (sa wa itsuwari no) is particularly unacceptable, I think. So, a tie.
Mitsune-shū 87
Love V: 2
Left (Tie).
逢見ても身にやは年の積るべき我老いらくになしと答ふな
| aimite mo mi ni ya wa toshi no tsumorubeki wa ga oiraku ni nashi to kotauna |
Even should you meet me Upon you the years Would the years pile up? So to this old man I would not have you say no… |
Lord Ari’ie.
843
Right.
包めども老蘇の森の薄紅葉たへでも色に出でにける哉
| tsutsumedomo oiso no mori no usumomiji taedemo iro ni idenikeru kana |
Although they may be hidden in The sacred grove of Oiso, The pale scarlet leaves’ Hues may not endure, but Still have appeared… |
The Provisional Master of the Empress Household Office.
844
The Right state: the Left’s poem’s conception is vague. The Left state: the Right’s poem has no faults to indicate.
In judgement: the Left is unclear in style, but the configuration of ‘upon you the years’ (mi ni ya wa toshi no) is pleasant. Although one wonders why ‘pale scarlet leaves’ (usumomiji) is used, the following ‘hues may not endure’ (taedemo iro ni) is elegant. The round should tie.
KKS XV: 826
KKS XV: 825
MYS IV: 587
[One of] twenty-four poems sent by Lady Kasa to Lord Ōtomo no Yakamochi.
わが形見見つつ偲はせあらたまの年の緒長くわれも思はむ
| wa ga katami mitutu sinopase aratama no tosi no wo nagaku ware mo omopamu |
On a keepsake of me Gaze and think of me; Fresh-jewelled as The years’ long thread Will my thoughts follow you. |
Love III: 28
Left.
いかなりし世世の報ひのつらさにてこの年月に弱らざるらん
| ika narishi yoyo no mukui no tsurasa nite kono toshitsuki ni yowarazaruran |
How many are My lives blessed with Pain alone, that Through these passing years and months It shows no sign of weakening? |
Lord Sada’ie
775
Right.
年経にしつらきに堪へてながらふと聞かれんさへぞ今は悲しき
| toshi henishi tsuraki ni taete nagarau to kikaren sae zo ima wa kanashiki |
The years have passed In nothing but pain On and on; All you would hear from me, though, Is that, now, I am sad. |
Lord Takanobu
776
The Right state: ‘It shows no sign of weakening’ [yowarazaruran] seems unsatisfactory in its placement in this poem. The Left state: there are no faults to inidicate.
In judgement: the Left’s second section seems fine, but the initial section’s ‘pain alone’ (tsurasa) sounds overly forceful. However, in the Right’s poem ‘All you would hear from me, though, is that, now, I am sad’ (kikaren sae zo ima wa kanashiki) in the final section seems both overly explicit and somewhat weak. I cannot award a win this round.