Love IV: 16

Left.
月を見てしばし思も忘られき晝間ぞ戀の慰めはなき

tsuki o mite
shibashi omoi mo
wasurareki
hiruma zo koi no
nagusame wa naki
Gazing at the moon
Briefly my sadness
I did forget; but
In the daylight, love is
No consolation, at all.

Lord Suetsune.
811

Right (Win).
傾かぬ妹が心に日影かな中空にのみ物思ひし

katabukanu
imo ga kokoro ni
hikage kana
nakazora ni nomi
mono’omoi shite
Not inclining is
My darling’s heart,
Just like this sunshine;
Upon the height of the heavens
Dwell my gloomy thoughts…

Nobusada.
812

The Right state: the Left’s poem has only ‘daylight’ (hiruma) and no other associated images, which makes it unpleasant on the ear. The Left state: we wonder about ‘Not inclining is my darling’ (katabukanu imo).

In judgement: in addition to the lack of associated images with ‘daylight’, the content of the initial line seems insufficient. Although the Right’s ‘not inclining is my darling’ is a little unclear, it seems as if her feelings are unmoved in any way. This is certainly seems like the conception of the sun being fixed overhead at noon, so the Right should win.

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