niwa no omo ni shigerinikerashi yaemugura towade ikuyo noaki kaenuran
All around my grounds How thickly seems to have grown Mugwort in layer after tangled layer; With no visits from him how many times Has autumn come round and round?
hototogisu hanatachibana ni yadoru to mo nanorazariseba ikade shiramashi
The cuckoo Among the orange blossom May make his lodging, but If he fails to announce himself How would one ever know?
Controller’s Graduate 23
Right
さよなかにみふねの山のほととぎすほのかになきてすぎぬなるかな
sayo naka ni mifune no yama no hototogisu honoka ni nakite suginu naru kana
In the midst of a night so brief Upon Mifune Mountain, A cuckoo, Faintly crying, Has passed his time!
Kerin’in Graduate 24
It is entirely impossible to decide between these two poems.
Neither of these poems is particularly bad. The Left flows smoothly and is elegant; the Right starts with ‘Mifune Mountain’ and then continues with ‘faintly’, which certainly does not lack skill. Thus, I would say that these should tie, although this will doubtless be a source of some dissatisfaction to the writer of the Right.
How deeply Moving might it be? For a cuckoo To have long awaited and He then comes to call…
Cell of Everlasting Truth 22
In regard to the Left’s poem, in the Poetry Match held in Engi 3, there was a compostion which went ‘Until in Kataoka / The plains of Ashita / Does resound / The mountain cuckoos / Are singing now!’[i] When this was recited, His Majesty laughed and so it was not read aloud all the way to the end. The expression ‘resound’ is poor. The diction of the Right’s poem is terribly stilted and really doesn’t trip off the tongue, but strictly speaking it has no particular faults. I make it the winner.
The Left’s poem seems move my heart to the greatest degree. However, it really is the case that ‘resounding with song’ is something which happens after hearing it—that’s when it would seem right to compose ‘come resound with song’. It’s extremely imprudent to guess and say that somewhere ‘might resound with song’ without hearing it. And yet, there is the conception of there being times, too, when the cuckoo doesn’t sing. In the Right’s poem ‘To have long awaited’ lacks harmony, and I would want there to be a break there, so I should say that the Left wins.
Written on the edge of a folding screen by a painting of geese flying in the clouds, when His Majesty ordered a celebration for the Junior Principal Handmaid.
白雲の中にまがひてゆく雁もこゑはかくれぬ物にざりける
shirakumo no naka ni magaite yuku kari mo koe wa kakurenu mono ni zarikeru
Within the clouds, so white, Entangled Goes a goose, Unable to conceal his cry With anything at all!
samidare ni nuru to mo yukamu hototogisu futakoe kinaku sato wa ari ya to
By the summer showers We will be drenched, yet let’s away! For the cuckoo Has come to sing and sing again At that estate, perchance…
Retired from the world 19
Right
さ月やみくらくはくらくほととぎすこゑはかくれぬ物にぞありける
satsuki yami kuraku wa kuraku hototogisu koe wa kakurenu mono ni zo arikeru
In the Fifth Month’s gloomy Darkness deep, The cuckoo Is unable to conceal his cry With anything at all!
Senior Assistant Minister Past Lecturer 20
Both Left and Right are workmanlike poems with little evidence of thought. With that being said, however, the conclusion of the Right’s poem is identical to that of a famous work by the Horikawa Minister. That poem is ‘The River Sao: / Mist rises, and from beyond / Come plover cries, / Their calls uninterrupted / By anything.’[1] And the Right here is, at the very least, extraordinarily redolent of it! Still, I feel the Left does linger in the heart.
The Left’s poem is not particularly remarkable, yet it has no faults worth mentioning. It doesn’t contain any distasteful expressions and resembles familiar compositions. The poem of the Right’s ‘darkness deep’ sounds like something said by a black-hearted scoundrel—I don’t feel it’s poetic diction at all! In addition, on the matter of the concluding ‘unable to conceal his cry’,[i] well, this appears in a range of earlier poems, as does ‘his cry uninterrupted’, so one should be hesitant about using it. I make the faultless Left the winner.
[1] Composed on plovers for a poetry competition in Eishō 4 [1050]. 佐保川の霧のあなたに鳴く千鳥聲は隔てぬ物にぞ有ける saogawa no / kiri no anata ni / naku chidori / koe wa hedatenu / mono ni zo arikeru ‘The River Sao: / Mist rises, and from beyond / Come plover cries, / Their calls uninterrupted / By anything.’ The Horikawa Minister of the Right [Fujiwara no Yorimune] (GSIS VI: 388)
[i] The only surviving example of this usage pre-dating this match is: Written on the edge of a folding screen by a painting of geese flying in the clouds, when His Majesty ordered a celebration for the Junior Principal Handmaid. 白雲の中にまがひてゆく雁もこゑはかくれぬ物にざりける shirakumo no / naka ni magaite / yuku kari mo / koe wa kakurenu / mono ni zarikeru ‘Within the clouds, so white, / Entangled / Goes a goose, / Unable to conceal his cry / With anything at all!’ Fujiwara no Kanesuke (Kanesuke-shū 48). There is also one further example in later poetry: Composed and sent when he heard that Inspector Kinmichi had had a number of people compose poems on the bush warbler at his residence. 春霞たちへだつれど鶯の声はかくれぬものとしらずや harugasumi / tachihedatsuredo / uguisu no / koe wa kakurenu / mono to shirazu ya ‘The haze of spring / Arising, interferes, yet / The warbler / Is unable to conceal his cry— / I wonder if he know it?’ Former Consultant Tsunemori (GYS I: 50)
ochikata ya kumoi no yama no hototogisu ama tsu yoso ni mo nakiwataru kana
From the distant Mount within the clouds A cuckoo In yonder heavens Sings his song!
Lord Saburō 17
Right
ほととぎすしのだのもりのしのびねをたづねざりせばいかできかまし
hototogisu shinoda no mori no shinobine o tazunezariseba ikade kikamashi
A cuckoo In Shinoda’s sacred grove Lets out a hushed cry; Had I not come to visit here, How might I have heard it?
Ushigimi 18
In regards the poem of the Left’s ‘from the distant’ and what follows, extremely recently and colloquially, at the Nakatomi purification ceremony it seems there was a composition, ‘in the distance, below the trees so lush’. This diction is contrary to the expected style of waka and something which occurs only extremely rarely. Truly, one does not compose using such diction in a poetry match. The poem of the Right has nothing of interest about it, yet it also lack faults to mention, so it wins.
This round, neither poem appears bad. The Left has a novel style, while the Right seems cliched, but its expression is smooth. I wonder if we could see these as a tie.
hototogisu maki no to bakari machitsuredo nakade akenuru natsu no shinonome
O, cuckoo, Briefly by my door of cedar wood Did I await you, yet No song, at all, brightened This summer edge of dawn.
Lord Dainagon 15
Right (Win)
ほととぎすなくうれしさをつつめどもそらにはこゑもとまらざりけり
hototogisu naku ureshisa o tsutsumedomo sora ni wa koe mo tomarazarikeri
At the cuckoo’s Song, my joy To hold fast did I try, yet In the skies, his cry Lingered not.
Lord Chūnagon 16
The Left’s poem, after careful consideration, has a graceful style. The diction of the Right’s poem is superb, and there is an excess of conception. Reading and reciting these leaves my aged heart at a loss. Thus, they tie.
In the Left’s poem, ‘briefly’ is an expression which means ‘just for a short time’, I think, and thus the sentiments are lacking. Saying ‘brightened…edge of dawn’ sounds as if the poet has only begun waiting at daybreak. One does see, apparently, a number of poems in prior matches where the poet has not heard the cuckoo. Nevertheless, I do wonder about whether this is appropriate, given that poems where the cuckoo has been heard are faultless. The Right’s poem is not that good, but it is poetic. Thus, it has to win.