Left.
鳴神は猶村雲にとゞろきて入日に晴るゝ夕立の空
narukami wa nao murakumo ni todorokite irihi ni haruru yūdachi no sora |
Thunder Among the crowding clouds yet Sounds, and The setting sun shines from a clearing Sky of evening showers. |
287
Right (Win).
これもやと人里遠き片山に夕立すぐる杉の村立
kore mo ya to hito sato tōki katayama ni yūdachi suguru sugi no muradachi |
Could that be it? Far from human dwellings In the distant mountains Passed o’er by evening showers: A grove of cedar trees… |
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The Right wonder whether, ‘it is not overly similar to have both “thunder” (naru) and “sound” (todoroku) in a single poem?’ The Left have no comments to make.
Shunzei states, ‘The Left’s poem does seem to have some sort of style about it, but the Right’s “Could that be it?” (kore mo ya) contains many possible meanings, and the phrasing is also pleasant, as is “a grove of cedar trees” (sugi no muradachi), and thus, it must win.’