Early Evening (晩立)
故郷をたづぬる道にかきくらしむら雲さわぐ夕立のそら
| furusato o tazunuru michi ni kakikurashi muragumo sawagu yūdachi no sora | My ancient home Is visited by paths Dragged into darkness by The crowding clouds In a sky of evening showers. |
Higo
Tag Archives: Evening Showers
Eikyū hyakushu 222
Eikyū hyakushu 220
Eikyū hyakushu 219
Kokin rokujō I: 510
Fubokushō IX: 3544
Summer II: 24
Left.
鳴神は猶村雲にとゞろきて入日に晴るゝ夕立の空
| narukami wa nao murakumo ni todorokite irihi ni haruru yūdachi no sora |
Thunder Among the crowding clouds yet Sounds, and The setting sun shines from a clearing Sky of evening showers. |
287
Right (Win).
これもやと人里遠き片山に夕立すぐる杉の村立
| kore mo ya to hito sato tōki katayama ni yūdachi suguru sugi no muradachi |
Could that be it? Far from human dwellings In the distant mountains Passed o’er by evening showers: A grove of cedar trees… |
288
The Right wonder whether, ‘it is not overly similar to have both “thunder” (naru) and “sound” (todoroku) in a single poem?’ The Left have no comments to make.
Shunzei states, ‘The Left’s poem does seem to have some sort of style about it, but the Right’s “Could that be it?” (kore mo ya) contains many possible meanings, and the phrasing is also pleasant, as is “a grove of cedar trees” (sugi no muradachi), and thus, it must win.’
Summer II: 23
Left.
夕立はなごりも見えず晴にけりいづら小河の音ばかりして
| yūdachi wa nagori mo miezu harenikeri izura ogawa no oto bakarishite |
The evening shower Leaving no trace Has cleared; Where is the stream? Amidst the sound of trickling water… |
285
Right (Win).
初瀬山入日はさせど菅原や伏見の里は夕立の空
| hatsuseyama irihi wa sasedo sugawara ya fushimi no sato wa yūdachi no sora |
From Hatsuse Mountain The setting sun does shine, yet Above Sugawara and The estate of Fushimi Evening showers fill the sky. |
The Provisional Master of the Empress’ Household Office.
286
Neither Left nor Right has anything to say this round.
Shunzei simply says, ‘The Right’s “The estate of Fushimi evening showers fill the sky” is particularly fine. The Right must win.’
Summer II: 22
Left (Win).
夕立の雲の水脈より伝ひきて軒端に落つる瀧の白玉
| yūdachi no kumo no mio yori tsutaikite nokiba ni otsuru taki no shiratama |
An evening shower: The clouds form channels Trailing onto My eaves’ edge and dropping A cataract of silver droplets. |
283
Right.
鳴神の空かきくらす夕立にかゝらぬ里もありとこそ聞け
| narukami no sora kakikurasu yūdachi ni kakaranu sato mo ari to koso kike |
Thunder Darkens the sky; This evening shower: A dwelling where it falls not There is, I’ve heard… |
284
The Right have no criticisms to make of the Left’s poem, while the Left merely wonder, ‘Where is the dwelling where the shower “falls not”?’
Shunzei: ‘“The eaves’ edge and dropping a cataract of silver droplets” is particularly well-formed. It must win.’
Summer II: 21
Left (Win).
あづまやの軒にしづくをとゞめをきて程なく晴れぬ夕立の空
| azumaya no noki ni shizuku o todomeokite hodo naku harenu yūdachi no sora |
On all four sides From the eaves droplets Yet hang; Quickly clearing is The evening shower from the sky. |
281
Right.
夕立のほどこそしばしとまりつれなごりも涼しみ山木の陰
| yūdachi no hodo koso shibashi tomaritsure nagori mo suzushi miyamagi no kage |
The evening shower’s Span, but briefly Would I rest here; Coolness, a memento In the shade of mountain trees. |
282
The Right query, ‘The use of “from the eaves droplets” (noki ni shizuku). Surely it should be “on the eaves droplets” (noki no shizuku)?’ The Left respond, ‘These are identical in meaning and have no real difference.’ They then wonder, ‘Whether the Right’s poem has not changed in topic to tree shade?’
Shunzei says simply, ‘Both Left’s latter section, and the Right’s initial section are particularly pedestrian in expression, but the Left’s “From the eaves droplets” is slightly superior.’