Tag Archives: hikari

Autumn I: 13

Left (Win).

影宿す程なき袖の露の上に馴れても疎き宵の稲妻

kage yadosu
hodo naki sode no
tsuyu no ue ni
naretemo utoki
yoi no inazuma
The light dwells
But for an instant on my sleeves
Where dewdrops rest;
Accustomed to it though I am, how distant is
Lightning in the evening.

Lord Sada’ie.

325

Right.

むば玉の闇をあらはす稲妻も光の程ははかなかりけり

mubatama no
yami o arawasu
inazuma mo
hikari no hodo wa
hakanakarikeri
Lily-seed
Dark, broken by
Lightning;
The flash,
So brief.

Lord Takanobu.

326

Neither team can find fault with the other’s poem this round.

Shunzei feels, ‘The spirit of “an instant on my sleeves” (hodo naki sode) is particularly fine, is it not? Prefacing “dark, broken by” (yami o arawasu) with “lily-seed” (mubatama no), seems somewhat overblown, and then concluding with “so brief” (hakanakarikeri) contradicts the initial statement. “Lightning in the evening” (yoi no inazuma) should win.’

Spring II: 23

Left (Win).

面影に千里をかけて見するかな春のひかりに遊ぶいとゆふ

omokage ni
chisato o kakete
misuru kana
haru no hikari ni
asobu itoyū
A vision from
Across a thousand leagues
Appears,
In the spring sunlight
Wavering ‘midst the haze.

A Servant Girl.

105

Right.

見わたせばあるかなきかに亂れつゝ心ぼそくも遊ぶいとゆふ

miwataseba
aru ka naki ka ni
midaretsutsu
kokorobosoku mo
asobu itoyū
When I look out
Is it there, or not?
Disordered and
Forlorn,
Wavering haze.

The Provisional Master of the Empress’ Household Office.

106

The Right say they have nothing particular to remark upon about the Left’s poem, but the Left wonder whether ‘forlorn’ (kokorobosoku mo) forms an appropriate linkage with the final line. (The point they are making is that in the original poem the final line starts asobu, which literally means ‘enjoy oneself’ or ‘play’, and thus ‘forlorn’ seems an incongruous prequel to it. In all the ‘Heat Haze’ poems I’ve translated asobu as ‘wavering’, as it’s use in this context is not for its sense, but as an addition piece of orthographic wordplay, as ‘heat haze’ (itoyū), is written with the characters for ‘threads’ (ito 糸) and ‘play’ ( 遊).)

Shunzei’s judgement is: ‘One has to wonder about the suitability of the final line of the Right’s poem, as is the gist of the Left’s remarks; by contrast, the ending of the Left’s poems seems particularly good. It has to be the winner.’