Left
山鳥のはつおの鏡掛けねども見し面影に音は泣かれけり
yamadori no hatsuo no kagami kakenedomo mishi omokage ni ne wa nakarekeri |
A mountain pheasant’s Tail of hempen cord this mirror Does not suspend, yet The face I saw there once Makes me weep out loud… |
Kenshō
1053
Right (Win)
面影をほの三嶋野に尋ぬれば行衛知られぬ鵙の草ぐき
omokage o hono mishimano ni tazunureba yukue shirarenu mozu no kusaguki |
Her face I did but briefly see at Mishimano When I visited there; I know not where has gone The shrike hiding in the grasses. |
Lord Takanobu
1054
The Gentlemen of the Right state: the Left’s poem has no faults to mention. The Gentlemen of the Left state: we wonder about the appropriateness of combining ‘Mishima Plain’ (mishimano) with ‘the shrike hiding in the grasses (mozu no kusaguki). Is there a poem as a precedent for this? If not, is it suitable?
In judgement: both poems have the conception of love: of imagining the pheasant and his mirror, and weeping at the memory of a lover’s face; and thinking of the shrike hiding in the grasses, visiting Mishima Plain, and recalling the past. However, what should we do about the matter of whether there is a precedent poem for ‘the shrike hiding in the grasses’ on Mishima Plain? Surely, it could be any plain, so there is no reason not to use this. The configuration of ‘I know not where has gone’ (yukue shirarenu) sounds better than that of ‘makes me weep out loud’ (ne wa nakarekeri). The Right, again, must win, I think.