Left.
朝まだき庭も籬も野分して露をきあがる草の葉もなし
asa madaki niwa mo magaki mo nowakishite tsuyu okiagaru kusa no ha mo nashi |
At the cusp of dawn My garden and my fence, too, After the gales, Are drenched in dew Flattened blades of grass – every one. |
359
Right.
夕間暮むら雲迷ひ吹風に枕定めぬ花の色いろ
yūmagure muragumo mayoi fuku kaze ni makura sadamenu hana no iroiro |
In the dim dusk light Crowding clouds confusedly Blown by the breeze Unable to rest are all The many blooms. |
360
The Right state that ‘linking “gales” with “drenched” is a poor expression’, while the Left feel that they have no criticisms of the Right’s poem.
Shunzei, again, broadly agrees: ‘What are we to make of the Left’s poem with a fence left standing in a garden after a gale? The Right’s “crowding clouds confusedly” is fine, indeed. Although the term “pillow” is unsuitable in this context, the Left’s “drenched in dew” cannot possibly be right here, either, and so the Right wins.”