Tag Archives: face

Love V: 29

Left (Tie).
象潟や妹戀ひしらにさ寢る夜の磯の寢覺に月傾きぬ

kisakata ya
koishirani
sanuru yo no
iso no nezame ni
tsuki katabukinu
In Kisakata and
In love;
I sleep the night away, and
Awaking on the rocky shore
Behold the moon descending.

Kenshō
897

Right.
清見潟岩敷く袖の浪の上に思ふもわびし君が面影

kiyomigata
iwa shiku sode no
nami no ue ni
omou mo wabishi
kimi ga omokage
At Kiyomigata
Sleeves spread atop the rocks,
Waves breaking atop them;
Heart filled with pain
At the memory of your face…

Jakuren
898

Left and Right both state that the opposing poem is pretentious.

In judgement: the Left’s poem seems well-constructed in its initial and final sections. However, as in Mototoshi’s poem long ago, ‘breaking a stem of miscanthus on the beach at Ise’, this seems to be a case of poetic allusion. The Right’s ‘Sleeves spread atop the rocks, waves breaking atop them’ (iwa shiku sode no nami no ue) seems to have been newly composed and seems elegant, but the final section is somewhat inferior. The Left has beginning and end matching. The Right has a superior initial section, but an inferior final one. Thus, the round ties.

 

Love V: 28

Left (Win).
旅寢する我をば床の主にて枕に宿る小夜の面影

tabinesuru
ware oba toko no
aruji nite
makura ni yadoru
sayo no omokage
When sleeping on my travels
I of my bedding
Am master!
Lodging by my pillow is
A face from a night too brief…

Lord Ari’ie
895

Right.
まどろまぬその夜な夜なを數ふれば夢路も遠き草枕哉

madoromanu
sono yona yona o
kazoureba
yumeji mo tōki
kusamakura kana
Unable to even doze
Night after night
I count them up, and
The path of dreams gets more
Distant from my grassy pillow.

Lord Takanobu
896

The Right state: the Left’s poem seems fine. The Left state: we find no faults to mention.

In judgement: the Right’s ‘the path of dreams gets more distant’ (yumeji mo tōki) sounds elegant, but the Left’s poem has already been assessed as ‘fine’ in the comments by the gentlemen of the Right. This round I will leave the judgement in their hands and make the Left the winner.

 

SZS XVIII: 1166

Composed in the conception of travel, when he presented a hundred poem sequence.

東路の野島が埼の浜風に我が紐ゆひし妹がかほのみ面影に見ゆ

azumadi no
nozima ga saki no
Famakaze ni
wa ga Fimo yuFisi
imo ga kaFo nomi
omokage ni miyu
On Eastern roads
At Nojima Point
In the breeze from off the beach:
My belt was tied
By my darling, her face,
A vision, appears before me…

Master of the Left Capital Office, Akisuke
左京大夫顕輔

Love V: 3

Left.
いひわたる我年波を初瀬川映れる影もみつわさしつゝ

iiwataru
wa ga toshinami o
hatsusegawa
utsureru kage mo
mitsuwashitsutsu
Many times I have proposed,
As the years come on me in waves
By the River Hatsuse,
But the reflection of my face
Shows signs of stiffness…

Kenshō.
845

Right.
姿こそ雪降りにたる身なれども袖は涙に色めきにけり

sugata koso
yuki furinitaru
mi naredomo
sode wa namida ni
iromekinikeri
My very form,
Has snow drifts
Upon me, but
My sleeves with tears
Have been strongly stained…

Lord Tsune’ie.
846

Both Left and Right state together that they are unable to find any words of praise.

In judgement: ‘River Hatsuse’ (hatsusegawa) and ‘many times I have proposed’ (iiwataru) are the only expressions with some conception of love, but they seem somewhat lacking, do they not? A form with ‘snow drifts’ (yuki furinitaru), having ‘sleeves strongly stained with tears’ (sode no namida wa iromeku) has a profound conception of love.

Love IV: 6

Left (Win).
月やそれほのみし人の面影を偲びかへせば有明の空

tsuki ya sore
honomishi hito no
omokage o
shinobikaeseba
ariake no sora
Was the moon her?
So briefly glimpsed, her
Face
I bring to mind, but simply see
The dawning sky…

A Servant Girl.
791

Right.
夜もすがら苦しき戀に晴れやらぬ心迷いや明暗の空

yomosugara
kurushiki koi ni
hareyaranu
kokoro mayoi ya
akegure no sora
All night long
From the pains of love
Have I had no relief;
Does the tumult in my heart reflect
The shading of the dawning sky?

Lord Tsune’ie.
792

The Right state: we find no faults in the Left’s poem. The Left state: the initial section of the Right’s poem sounds a little clumsy.

In judgement: both the Left’s ‘dawning sky’ (ariake no sora) and the Right’s ‘shading of the dawning sky’ (akegure no sora) sound pleasant, but the Left’s conception of commencing with ‘Was the moon her?’ (tsuki ya sore) and following it with ‘I bring to mind, but simply see the dawning sky’ (shinobikaeseba ariake no sora) appears particularly profoundly appropriate for the topic. Thus, the Left must win.

Love IV: 5

Left.
面影も別れに變る鐘の音にならひ悲しき東雲の空

omokage mo
wakare ni kawaru
kane no oto ni
narai kanashiki
shinonome no sora
That your face
Is transformed to parting
By the bell’s toll:
How sad this custom
From the eastern skies!

Lord Sada’ie.
789

Right (Win).
暁の涙やせめてたぐふらん袖に落ち來る鐘の音かな

akatsuki no
namida ya semete
tagūran
sode ni ochikuru
kane no oto kana
At dawn, are
My tears, forced to be
Like them?
Falling on my sleeves:
The tolls of the bell!

Nobusada.
790

The Right state: the sense of the Left’s poem is difficult to grasp on hearing. The Left state: the expression ‘forced to be’ (semete) seems out of place in the context of the Right’s poem.

In judgement: The Left’s poem, just as was said of Kisen’s poetry – that it was ‘obscure of diction and indefinite from beginning to end’  – seems to be in just such a style. The Right’s poem, while it does not, in fact, sound like a suitable context for ‘forced to be’ (semete), provides a profound conception in ‘falling on my sleeves’ (sode ni ochikuru). The Right should win.